The Night Before
by Sapphonic
Summary: Set at end of Season 11. with Susan, Carter, Jake & Neela. Jabby : Carby crossover with Suby & Neeby friendships ::Completed::
1. Criked

**"The Night Before…"**

**Summary:** Set at end of Season 11 (Some spoiler referrals), Abby is seeing Jake. She goes out for a drink with Carter who is down in the dumps in need of a friend… after a few drinks one leads to another… Jabby – Carby Crossover with Suby friendship.

**Characters mainly used:** Susan, Carter, Jake, Neela and hint of everyone…

This is my very first fan fic, ok so I'm no Michael Crichton or J K Rowling so please be gentle with me! R&R!

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters I wish! Sigh! nor make any money from stories written, happy to write for free with pleasure! ER belongs to Michael Crichton and John Wells.

**A/N: Warning – **Rated for Sexual Content in Chapters 3, 8, 25 & 45. Little strong language mentioned throughout the story.

I know its long but take some time to have a read for the surprises….

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* * *

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Chapter One - Criked

Ambulance bay doors crashed open, EMT's Dumar and Olbes rush in with a young man on a gurney.

"23 year old male, Gun Shot Wounds to chest and abs, stats 160/100 pulse ox 96. O neg. No intubation…" Olbes said giving the stats, "Throat's too bloody, messy and swollen"

"Ok put him in Trauma 2, Get a CBC, Chem. 7, crit, O neg blood type." Kovac said in his thick Croatian accent. Abby and Susan assist. Luka filled in the details to them.

"No intubation? Upper airway obstruction, I'll crike him," Abby said. "Haleh, get a 6.5 and a crike" The nurse handed over the crike tray so Abby can perform the procedure

"Too damn right it's bloody and swollen, Haleh can you suction the throat?" She asked the nurse who probed the suction tool around the victim's airway, to clear it.

"Quickly Abby his vitals are dropping" Kovac listening through his stethoscope looking up at the brunette.

"I've got it!" she yelled, blowing away a loose strand of her hair. "Epi, one to 10,000, two cc's. IV Push" Susan looked on with an impressive smile and nodded.

"Does anyone know his name?" Susan asked.

By coincidence Jerry pops his head through the door and said "Cops are on the way, they'll have details on the Vic"

She nodded. "Thanks Jerry"

"In need of assistance here?" Dark haired handsome Med Student Jake Scanlon doctor asked, putting his stethoscope over his head.

"Sam, call the OR, GSW patient's has severe internal bleeding, needs surgery ASAP" Luka ordered his request.

The heart monitor started bleeping erratically "We're losing him Luka! He's losing too much blood," Abby shouted

"They're paging Dr hair, he's out and about" Sam smirked as she was referring to Dubenko.

"Sam, order more O neg, in order to do blood transfusion, and page Dubenko again, double quick!" the Croatian Doctor shouted

The doors flew open and a man in late 30's with wild curly hair and frameless glasses in blue scrubs bursts in, it was Dubenko. "Ok I'll take over, my patient now, fill me in on the details, oh hi Abby" She knew the fact, he has a soft spot for her, and Abby forced a smile back.

"Was he looking at you?" Jake asked rather loud, when they left the room

"God, not so loud...we're supposed to keep this quiet remember?" she answered

"Err… okay...and where were you last night... I kept calling and calling, but no answer"

"Sorry, went for a drink with Carter" she said and left Jake standing in the middle of the hall.

For a drink with Carter, she must have been mad. He had some troubles with Kem and she still cared about him, so they went for a drink... multiple drinks. They both were drunk and the next thing she knows is waking up next to him, naked and ashamed. She left in a hurry and was sooo hoping not to see him today. This should be kept secret, like her current thing with Jake.

"God, I'm a mess," she mumbles to herself. She smokes a cigarette outside and the moment she turns around to go back inside, Carter is coming towards her with a cup of coffee.

"Hey, I...it..." they both say at the same time. They laugh. Silence. They decide not to talk about it anymore, it just happened.

Suddenly, an ambulance is coming into the bay with victims and they both have other work to do that to chat around...


	2. The Night Before

**Chapter Two – The Night Before**

_The night before…_

Abby sat at the admit desk, doing paper work, she looked up and sees an unhappy Carter walking towards the board.

"Hey! You ok?" Abby asked reaching over to put file in a tray.

"Yeah so-so" Carter replied, rubbing his name off and turn to her "erm… are you doing anything after work?"

"Not really, why?

"I was wondering if you like to grab a drink on the way home," Carter smiled nervously hoping that she says yes.

"Yeah why not, maybe we can catch up on stuff, haven't seen much of you lately"

"Yeah well I've been trying to sort things out in my life" Carter shrugged and gave a forced smile "and I erm… just needed someone to talk to"

Abby busily filling in a discharge form, looked up, raised her brows and pursed her lips "You know that I'm always here for you John, ok?" and walked away in to a treatment room.

It was the end of the shift, Abby just getting her coat from her locker. Carter walked in.

He asked "You ready?"

"Yes I am" Abby answered, untying her hair, letting it down and gave him a smile.

They leave the ER together, walking out to the Ambulance bay; the cold Chicago air hits them.

"God! It's freezing" Abby commented, wrapping the scarf round herself. Carter laughed, shivering. They enter the main street and stood outside the bar next door Ike Ryan's.

"You want to go here?" Carter asked.

Abby gave that look clenching her teeth trying to fight the cold "Err… no, maybe we should go to that bar nearer you? I've not been in there a while"

"Ok" Carter nodded in reply.

Abby knew that fact Jake would be there with other med students. It would make things awkward especially no one knows the fact she's sleeping with him! They both climbed the stairs up to the EL. One just pulled up in time for them to step on. They spent the journey in silence; Abby spent most of it looking out of the window while Carter looks at her in admiration thinking _Damn! Why did I break up with her? _

The EL arrives at Carter's stop, they both step off, walk down the steps to a busy street and headed to the nearby bar. Carter opened the door for Abby and they go in.

* * *

The bar was half empty, music playing, not too loud, and perfect. Makes a change as the place is normally packed out like if it were on a weekend night, they wouldn't be able hear each other talk.

"I'll get the drinks, what do you want?" Carter asked.

"A beer please" Abby replied, Carter shook his head in refusal.

"A beer Carter! If you're not gonna get me one, I'll get it myself" Abby frowned and bit her bottom lip. "What's your problem, John? You asked me if I like to join you for a drink and you refuse to get me one" she put her hands on her hips and nodded "Oh I get it! You are worried I'd go into relapse…"

She walked off "I'll go get us a table"

Abby found a table. She sat down and crossed her legs. She started tapping her foot on the table leg mumbling to herself "Uh! You really piss me off… who does he think he is?" She knows that he is very protective but sometimes he acts as he really thinks that he owns her…

Abby puts her hand in her coat pocket, to remove her cigarettes, pulled one out, placed the packet on the table and lights up. She then puts her hand in to the other pocket and pulled out her cell phone, flipped it open. She took a long draw of her cigarette as she looked at it.

'12 missed calls & 1 text message' – they were all from Jake, Text message reads _"Abby, where are you? I've called by your home, you're not there, call me, Jake xx" _

"Here…" Carter said, seated in front of Abby and placed the drinks on the table. Abby shoved her phone back in her pocket. Carter smiled at Abby but she doesn't smile back. "Look, I'm sorry I've shouldn't have done that"

"No you shouldn't have…" Abby snapped and her eyes scanned around the bar "This place hasn't changed one bit" She looked at him again and started smirking at him. "So what's eating you Carter?" she asked picking up the bottle to take a sip.

"Oh this and that" He replied.

They chat about work, their family members, funny memories, Kem leaving him, losing the baby and rebounding with Wendall… Their drinks were flowing like their conversations...

Few hours later… 

"You want to come back to my place for coffee? Well it is nearby," Carter asked.

"Err. Sure I'll have a quick one" Abby rose up and loses her balance touching her head "Whoa… one too many!" They grabbed their coats and left the premises.

"Thanks Abs" Carter smiled as they both walk across the road to another street.

"What for?" Abby replied looking puzzled

"For listening and a good night"

"S-s-sure no worries"

During the walk to his place, they never spoke a word, only thing was Abby can see in the corner of her eye is Carter kept looking at her on numerous occasions. She kept giggling about it; it's the drink that made her feel silly. They arrived at his home. Carter gets his keys out, unlocks the door and they entered the building.

"Hmm I'm surprised you haven't got you self a big mansion instead of here, _rich boy_?" Abby commented shedding her coat and started to giggle.

Carter chuckled at her "Why would I want one now? I'll get one when I marry the women I love and have six kids with her!" Nowwho would be that woman - Kem, Wendall or Abby?Abby winced at the thought of six children!

Abby made her way to the lounge and looked around. Carter goes in the kitchen and makes the coffee. She walked in to the kitchen and commented about the newly done décor.

"About time you got this damn place a makeover" Taking the mug from Carter.

"I wanted to make Kem feel at home," Carter answered with an embarrassed smile because of his relationship with her had failed. "But she didn't feel that way since that day we arrived in Chicago"

They both walk in to the lounge…


	3. Intoxicated

**Chapter 3 – Intoxicated (Rated M)**

"I better get going, it's late" Abby said, getting up from the couch, feeling woozy from the drinks "I'm on early tomorrow, thanks for the coffee"

"Stay…I can put you up for the night and give you a lift in the morning" Carter offered.

"Thanks but no thank you" Abby walked in to the hallway and Carter grabbed her hand before she reaches for her coat. She stumbled with drunkenness and turned to him with a frown.

"Abby, I don't know what I want?" Carter said, focusing on her beautiful eyes.

"I don't know John, tell me?" Abby slurred and shook her head "I know you have problems with Kem but I thought everything was going just fine with Wendall?"

Carter shrugged "We broke up"

"Oh? I'm sorry"

"We're better as friends"

"Yep, like me and you"

Carter almost answered but stopped with his mouth slight open, the disappointment has just hit him…

They focused at each other. Abby raised a brow waiting for him to say something.

"Why can't we give it another go?"

"What?"

"I know we still have feelings for each other"

"Do we?" Her thoughts were _Damn right still have feelings for you, but you dumped me while in Africa, you only been there 5 mins and got some one pregnant! Huh! You hurt me and… anyway I'm with Jake!_

Abby looked away and sighed"Carter, look, we've both had a lot to drink tonight, don't waste your breath"

"Abby, I have never stopped loving you, I know I made a big mistake breaking it off with you, at the time was right because we were together at the wrong time, with your family problems"

Abby's mouth opened in disbelief.

"My family problems? M-m-y family problems! What about you? You had problems too with your parents splitting" she protested, stuttering due to intoxication "and I-I-I had kept your sanity together when Gamma died!"

"Yes, ok yes I got your point" Carter rolled his eyes "but I think this time…it feels right"

"Night night John!" Abby waved, she turned away heading to the door. Carter once again grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him and planted a kiss on her lips "For god sakes Carter. Mmmfft!" Abby pushed herself away from him. She stared at him feeling shocked from the unexpected kiss.

"I want you Abby" Giving her that sexy look. Abby stared at him for a few more seconds. She sighed and pulled her body into Carter and kissed him. This time Abby gives him a full deep passionate kiss, she forced her tongue into his. She thought _oh what the hell!_ He ran his hand down to her back and grasped her pert bottom. She lets out a pleasurable moan. He knew damn well she wanted him as much as her wanted her, she loves to play hard to get, she can be an awkward and stubborn at times.

Abby pulled away from him again and made contact by focusing into each other eyes for a moment… Their lips meet again… He's got the message… She wants him… They made their way into his bedroom...

* * *

He pulled her black top over her head, while she unbuttoned his shirt. Carter looked at her lacy black bra in admiration and slid his hand down her stomach then into her panties, massages her while he nuzzles her cleavage. 

"Oh!" Abby moaned.

He took a mouthful of her areola, sucking it gently while she ran her fingers through his hair. She gripped the hair on the back of his head and pulled him up to her eye level. Abby licked his top lip teasing him and nibbled the bottom lip. Carter was shuddering with excitement. He knew how delicious she was when he leaned forward to explore his tongue inside her mouth. They both gasped out for air, especially Abby she was panting, desperate for him to be inside her.

He started kissing her stomach. Grasps hold of her matching lacy underwear and pulled them down to her ankles. He slipped off his boxers too. He lowered to kiss the inside of her thigh, and then probed his tongue into her core. Abby gripped the pillows round her head groaning trying to cope with the euphoria of him sucking her throbbing clit.

They lay on the bed embraced in kissing and naked. Carter paused to reach over to his bedside drawer. He pulled out a little foil-like packet – Protection.

"I'll put it on," Abby whispered, taking the condom and she lowers herself down to his groin region. She slipped Carter's growing arousal into her mouth. Sucking it, sliding up and down. She flicked her tongue around his bell-end. She is surprised that he has managed to _keep it up_ after the amount of drinks he had earlier.

"Oh! Abby" Carter groaned, gripping on the bed sheet, enjoying the pleasure.

She rolled on the rubber then straddled on top of him. She started to do back and forth rhythm with her hips, with him holding her breasts, massaging them. He groaned at the odd hard thrust she makes.

"I want you to take me from behind," Abby begged.

Carter entered her from behind

"Uh!" Abby cried. She forgotten how deep and tight that position was. He grabbed handful of her hair, other hand gripping her hip and started riding her. Giving it her like as if it was his last. Listening to her continued moaning out made him thrust faster and harder.

Carter turned Abby on to her back, deep kissing. He moulded his body against her by forcing her legs apart then he slipped inside her again.

"Oh!" Abby moaned with orgasmic pleasure from Carter pumping circular thrusts into her. Hearing her moaning, her core contracting around his arousal had made him too excited that his orgasm was building up. He gave her one last hard thrust then groaned out and collapsed on to her.

Carter tried to catch his breath; he lifted his head up to look down at Abby making eye contact, then he leaned down to kiss.

He whispered in her ear. "I love you, Abby…"


	4. The Morning After

**Chapter 4 – The Morning After**

_The morning after…_

Abby opened her eyes and tried to focus at the time alarm clock, read 06.26. She closed them tight realising her head was thumping.

"Oh god" She moaned groggily rubbing her forehead. She turned to the body next to her "morning J-j…" she managed to stop herself saying Jake and gasped "Carter!"

She sat up looking around the room in a dazed with her eyes widen, knowing the fact she has just woken up, naked next to John Carter. He was still asleep; he didn't hear her morning greeting. Abby wiggled out of bed quickly, started picking up the trail of her clothes scattered around the bedroom floor and the hallway. She quickly puts her clothes on, grabbed her coat and headed out the door. The slam of the front door woke Carter up.

Outside, Abby grabbed hold of the railing. A wave of nausea from hangover had just hit her. She tried to catch her breath, as she felt suffocated by the shock of waking up next to him. Abby loved Carter but she is so ashamed that she cheated on Jake. Even though they're not serious, it's not Abby's nature to sleep with someone else. She knows how that's feels, her ex-husband Richard slept around. Abby started to walk quickly down the street heading home, plenty of time to shower and get changed ready for work. She one dreaded thought _'what if Jake's waiting on my doorstep and sees me coming home wearing yesterdays clothes?' _

_

* * *

Present day… Back to the Ambulance bay entrance after bumping into Carter…_

Abby walked back in the Emergency Room, looking embarrassed and distracted. "Shit, what have put myself into? Carter is not going to forget…"

"Abby, I have 14 year old female complaining of severe abdominal pains and vaginal bleeding" said Chuny giving her the chart.

"Thanks Chuny" Abby replied taking the clipboard; they both walked to the teenage patient in the treatment room. Stood by the gurney with Chuny on the opposite side. Abby glanced at the chart for the details.

"Hi" Abby greeted looking at the girl. "You are Sara Lanski?"

"Yes I am" Sara replied, groaning with pain

"I'm Dr. Lockhart" Abby smiled "I believe you are suffering from severe abdo pains?" The girl nodded in reply "Can you show me where?"

"Here" Sara pointing where the pain is, lower abdomen.

"Have you had pain like this before?"

The girl shook her head.

"When did the bleeding start?"

"I don't know, stop asking me stupid questions"

"Are you pregnant?" Abby asked with one hand on hip and the other leaning on the gurney

The teenager replied defensively by snapping at Abby "No I am not bitch!"

Abby flinched at her aggressive reply "ok…"

"Sara, I am going examine the area with my hands, you may feel discomfort when I press" Sara nodded gritting her teeth. Abby puts her hand on her lower abdominal and examined her. She pressed on the critical spot. Abby pursed her lips in deep concentration and moved her eyes to one side, she then cocked her head looking at Chuny.

"Chuny" She said as they walk away from the patient and stood out in the corridor. She spoke in a soft tone "She's pregnant alright, I am afraid it looks like she's threatened with miscarriage" Chuny nodded, Abby continued "Can you order a ultrasound and meds for pain please, page me when they're available"

The nurse walked away, heading down the corridor.

"Miss Lanski, We are going to do an ultrasound on you and going give you something for the pain" Abby announced reassuring her patient.

"What you think wrong me?" Sara asked

"Well" Rubbing her hands "You're pregnant and a threatened miscarriage"

The girl looked up and down at Abby and sneered "You're talking shit, bitch"

"Look young lady, cut the attitude, I'll will be a bitch by sending you home and let you bleed to death" Abby snapped and made her way out of the room until a shout from the angry young teen catches her attention.

"I am gonna report you bitch! Threatening me like that"

"Try me!" Abby shouted back. She didn't care; she did care about her patients, but not in the mood to deal with conflicts as she just having a really bad day…

At the admit desk. Carter sat down in front of the Computer and Jake came up from behind putting a file in a try and asked "Anyone seen Abby?"

"Yeah, she's with a patient," Carter answered without his eyes leaving the PC screen and asked, "Why you want her?"

Jake grinned and folded his arms "Well… she is my rotation supervisor"

Carter chuckled and turned to Jake "yeah, you're like a lost puppy following her all the time"

Abby appeared and looked at her two admirers. "Talking about me?"

"Err…I was having a joke" Carter stuttered.

She arched her brows and walked off to the Doctor's lounge.


	5. Toilet Paper Blues

**Chapter 5 – Toilet Paper Blues**

Abby entered the lounge and walked to the coffee maker. Picked up a mug and poured herself a drink. She sighed and heard the door opening. She doesn't look to see who just came in to the room. She thought. _God, can't I have five minutes peace?_

A male voice asked "Are you ok?"

Abby turned round "Jake!"

"You seem to be on edge today? Are you avoiding me?" Jake asked looking serious for once.

"No"

"Then what's wrong?"

"I'm just tired," Abby replied rubbing her forehead.

"Hey why don't I drop by at your place tonight, and maybe give you one of my massages?"

"Maybe"

The door opened again and it was Carter "like I said… a lost puppy!" he laughed.

"Back off Carter" Jake growled

"Ha! You think Abby ever have interest in you?"

Jake almost opened his mouth to speak but his lover interrupted him.

"Jake! Just go, I'll talk to you later"

As Jake leaves the room, both guys never took eyes off each other. Carter stood there looking smug.

"Carter, why are you such an ass?"

"Come on Abby, it's obvious that he got the hots for you"

She puts down her mug and walked to her locker "Has he?" Opens the door and her hands rummaged around on the shelf finding her cigarettes, the packet was empty. She sighed and slammed the door shut. She turned around and Carter stood in front of her.

"You were great last night"

Abby doesn't reply, she leaned her back against the locker, biting her bottom lip looking down to the floor. Feeling ashamed, she can't look him the eye. His body leaned forward to press against her leaving her tiny frame wedged between him and the locker. Carter tilted his head down to kiss her. Abby closed her eyes tightly, starting to feel panicky. She felt his soft lips, brushing on her neck, brushing them against her ears and whispered in her ear "I love you…" He continued to kiss down her neck, making his way down to her cleavage. He cupped her breasts. Abby moaned out loud until she opened her eyes realising where they were and he was doing. Anyone could walk through that door!

"Stop it Carter" Abby pushed him away "Are you crazy? Not in here"

"What's the problem Abs?" Carter asked.

"Just… not in here" Abby walked towards to the door and leaves.

Carter just stood there shaking his head _'_It never bothered her before when we were a couple…'

* * *

Abby rushed into the ladies room, headed in one of empty stalls and locked the door from behind. She puts the toilet seat lid down and sat on it. She grabbed hand full of toilet paper and started to cry.

A female _humming_ away entered the room. Abby stops sniffling, listened to the footsteps in to the next stall. A minute later Abby lets go again when she heard the loo flushing. The noise drowned her cry.

The woman came out of the cubicle reached for the tap and looked at herself in the mirror. It was Dr. Susan Lewis. She is inspecting her face making sure she looked presentable. She overheard a 'hiccup' from behind and swung her head round. Susan stepped back and tapped on the door.

"Hello? Are you ok in there?" She asked.

"Go away!" Abby shouted.

Susan narrowed her eyes, suspecting that the voice did sound familiar.

"Abby, is that you?"

Abby unlocked the door and stood there with mascara smudges down her face.

"Abby! What's wrong?" Susan asked worriedly

Abby shrugged her shoulders and blew her nose. She walked to the sink and looked at herself in the mirror. 'Uh! What a state!'She turned on the tap and bent over to bathe her face with cold water. Reaches for the paper towels and dried her face. Abby turned to Susan and cried again. Susan puts her arms round Abby to embrace a hug. Giving her a gentle squeeze.

"You want to talk about it?"

"I did a really stupid thing last night" Abby nodded "I went for a drink with Carter after work, he needed a friend to talk to"

"Yes, as you would" Susan nodded in her reply.

"We got quite drunk, went back to his place and erm..." Abby shrugged her shoulders at Susan feeling embarrassed to say the words.

Susan carried on nodding until it dawned on her what Abby was implying.

"Oh god! Abby you didn't!" Susan laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"Well… I knew you guys would get back together again"

"No we're not," Abby said, defensively "I feel so ashamed… because I'm seeing someone else"

"Who? You never told me?" Susan looking shocked and surprised

"Well it's not serious, we're just having fun"

"I'm surprised you never told me considering we're best friends? Who is he? I'm intrigued!"

"I really don't want to say…" Abby looked away, knowing that she'll be in trouble for seeing a med student.

"Oh don't tell me its Dubenko!" The pretty blonde laughed, nudging her arm.

"Eww Susan!" Abby laughed back.

"Maybe you want to talk more over a drink?"

"Yep, this isn't the time and place,"

"Chuck going to his parents tomorrow for a few days taking Cosmo with him, obviously I can't have the time off" Susan said with her arms folded "I could do with the company"

"Ok" Abby's pager goes off and looked down "Chuny… I've got to go"


	6. Eavesdropping

**Chapter 6 - Eavesdropping**

Sara Lanski rolled her eyes when she saw Abby entering the room. She smirked at Sara's expression.

"I'm going perform an ultrasound on you Miss Lanski"

"Yeah whatever" Sara replied, looking at her doctor wondering why her eyes were all puffy.

Abby grabbed a stool placed it next to the gurney and sat down. She reached for the transductor probe and pulled it towards herself and placed it on the bed. She tapped away on the keyboard inputting details.

"Can you lift your gown up please, I want to scan your abdomen" Abby asked grabbing the gel bottle. "I'm gonna put this gel your tummy ok? This may feel a little cold" She squeezed out the gooey blue gel on the girl stomach, puts the bottle down. She grabbed the transductor, placed it on the girl's stomach and steers it around vigorously to pick up a clear picture on the screen.

* * *

Susan walked across the road to the Jumbo Mart to grab a coffee. She entered the store, looking around. She sighed when she saw the length of the queue at the coffee counter. Susan joined the queue. She looked down one of the aisles and saw Jake on his break.

Jake strode along the aisle and bumped into an old friend. They shook hands and started chatting. From a distance Susan can hear them.

"Hey long time no see!" the guy said, "You still training to be a doc?"

"Yeah I am on my fourth year and working over the road" Jake replied

"Oh yeah County General?"

Jake nodded.

"God that place is busy, I bet it's nice having to work with those hot nurses!"

Jake laughs, "Yeah…"

"So have you got a babe in your life then?"

"Yeah I work with her, she's a doctor"

"Yeah! What she like?" The guy asked out of curiosity

"Hot! She's my rotation supervisor!"

"Really? You're living dangerously aren't you?"

"That's the thrill of it!" Jake laughed

Susan gasped after eavesdropping their conversation. Her mouth is hanging wide open. Susan stormed out of the store leaving the queue. She dashed across the road into the ambulance bay and entered the hospital through the sliding doors.

A young Indian doctor stopped Susan. "Can I speak to you for second?"

"Later, Neela" Susan replied glancing around "Has anyone seen Abby?"

"She's in treatment room four Dr Lewis"

"Thanks Neela"

* * *

Chuny is assisting Abby whilst she is working away on the ultrasound.

"See that. That's your baby," Abby is pointing at the screen. "Heartbeats good, I can see a slight separation on your placenta which have cause the bleeding"

"How far gone I am?"

"About 15 weeks, we will have to admit you, you will need bed rest"

"I can't do that," the girl sobbed "My parents gonna kill me now, they don't know I'm pregnant!"

"I'll go and phone for a bed Doctor," Chuny said. The nurse walked out and bumped in to Susan looking infuriated.

"Dr Lockhart" Susan said in a whispered tone "I want to see you in my office!"

"Huh?" Abby turned her head and saw her angry looking boss stood next to her. "Ok, I'll be there a in a sec" Abby narrowed her eyes at her patient. _Did she really report me?_


	7. Big Mouth

**Chapter 7 – Big Mouth**

Susan sat at her desk signing paper work, heard a knock on the door.

"Come in"

The door opened and the pretty brunette popped her round the door. Susan waved her in, placed her pen down on the desk, clasping her hands together. Susan made direct eye contact at Abby, who stood in front of her desk.

She pursed her lips "I'm disappointed in you Abby"

Abby looked at her but doesn't say a word.

"I might have to report this to Weaver"

"Oh Well I can explain!" said Abby defensively; thinking her patient had reported her.

"You know the rules Abby, any member of staff should tell me if they are having a relationship with their colleague!" Susan shouted, "For me to know in case any conflicts arises between two people and the worst thing is he's a med student and you are his supervisor!"

Abby clenched her jaw, in shock; she wanted the ground to swallow her up. _'God! How did she find out? Oh fuck! Jake can't you keep that big mouth of yours shut?'_

"But I didn't think it would last, so I didn't bother to say anything"

"How long you two have been seeing each other?" Susan asked

"Erm..." Abby raised her brows, puffed out her cheeks "About a month?"

Susan glanced at her; leaned back in to her chair and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Abby, I think you will have to make an decision"

"Ok I understand… and I understand you reporting this to Weaver, you are only doing your job"

Abby stood looking at Susan, feeling bad; she had really let her friend down. She "I'm really sorry Susan"

"Saying sorry isn't going to solve it" Susan nodded back "You can go now and your punishment is to do the drug lock-up stocktaking on your break tomorrow"

Abby turned round putting her hand on the door handle and paused after she turned it. She turns her head round looking at Susan again.

"I guess tomorrow night's cancelled then?" She asked turning round again to look at Susan.

"No" She answered. "Are you still coming?"

* * *

Chuny shot out of the treatment room, looking for Abby and saw her walking down the corridor.

"Abby your patient is crashing!"

Abby ran after Chuny catches her attention.

The girl was lying, soaked in blood, Chuny and Haleh scurrying about sorting out IV's and drips.

"She started haemorrhaging" Haleh said, checking the vitals.

Abby nodded as she stamped her foot on the brake of the gurney and released it.

"Lets take her to Trauma 2!" Abby commanded as they raced the gurney in to the other room. They crash the door open. Greg Pratt followed and joined in

"What we got?"

"Female, 14, Primigravida, Gestation 15 weeks, O neg, placental separation… haemorrhaging" Abby replied "Ok, everybody on my count, one, two, three. Nice and gently. Good"

They lifted the patient over on to the trauma bed.

"BP falling 60 over 40, were losing pulse!" said one of the nurses.

"She needs transfusion quickly, disturbance of the blood coagulation, her kidneys will shut down!" Abby instructed

"Need to load up on the O neg!" Pratt shouted.

"Lines in!"

"Push 4 mag sulphate"

"Someone call OR!"

"Pressures dropping"

"She's in Fib! Paddles!" Abby shouted "Haleh, 250" She places them on the patients chest.

"Clear!"

The girl's body jolted up as defibrillator shocked her. The cardiac monitor screeched out the lethal rhythms.

"Charging to 300 and clear!"

The body jolted again. Still no sign of life

"Turn volume up to 360" Dubenko ordered, coming in from the trauma room next door. "What we have here?"

Pratt gave the details.

"Clear!"

Abby placed the paddles on the girl's chest again. Another jolt.

The cardiac monitor beeps normal heart rhythm again.

"Normal sinus" Haleh announced.

"Good work guys, get her up to OR now!" Dubenko said.

Abby snapped off her surgical gloves, threw them in to the trashcan. She stood there with one hand on hip and the other rubbing her nose. She sighed and shook her head as she walked out.

Her shift was over, she's glad to see the end of the day…


	8. The Couch

**Chapter 8 – The Couch (Rated M)**

Jake sat on the doorstep reading a book. He looked up and saw Abby walking from a distance.

"Hey!" Jake got up and picked up his rucksack.

"Hi" Abby replied climbing up the steps to her door and unlocks it.

"Haven't you forgotten something?"

"Huh? What?" She turned to him and Jake leaned over to kiss her. "Oh that…"

"You really are having a bad day!"

"Yup"

Abby is seriously not in the mood for company. All she wants is to chill out at home in peace maybe a nice soak in a hot bath hoping to wash away all her troubles. She opened her post box in the lobby, grabbed her mail and looked at them.

"Junk, bill, junk"

"I've got to work night shift tonight"

"Ok" Abby replied as she headed to her apartment door. She bends over to get the newspaper left on the floor. Jake came up from behind and grabbed her hips.

"Oh!" Abby laughed in surprise.

She straightens herself up with her back to him. He pulled away her beautiful long hair and caressed her neck with kisses.

"Mmm" She moaned.

He moved his hand from her hip, unbuttoned her shirt and slipped inside to touch her soft skin. Abby placed her hand on Jakes thigh then slid it over to feel his growing arousal. She unlocked the door and entered her home. Abby turned to face Jake, rose up on her toes to kiss him and kicked the door shut. As she stepped backwards, Abby tugged his coat and pulled him down with her on to the sofa. Jake is positioned on top of her. They are kissing passionately. Abby reached down to unzip Jake's trousers then slipped her hand in to play with him.

"Oh!" Jake moaned.

She unzipped her pants and tried to wiggle out of them and her panties off, underneath him. Abby brushed her soft kisses down his neck and whispered in his ear "I want you"

She knew sex would relieve her tension. Jake stopped to look at her. He pulled out a condom from his pocket, quickly rolled it on his arousal and responded to Abby by spreading open her legs for him to mould into her.

"Oh!" Abby gasped as Jake entered in her. He started pumping hard thrusts into her with his well-endowed arousal. Abby griped on to her sofa arm with both hands over her head. Moaning out loud with his rhythm. She is clenching her teeth, putting up with his stamina.

Jake is quite rough and straight forward especially being a young guy; he has a lot to learn…

Unlike Carter, he knows how to make love… with Jake, its just sex…

* * *

The early morning heavy rain drummed on the bedroom window. On the bed, Abby laid with one arm over her head, tucked under the pillow, chewing at her bottom lip, staring at the leak stains on the ceiling. Thinking about what consequences she may have to face about her situation with Jake and Carter. She had spent the whole night alone, Jake left shortly after their session on the couch, he got a called in to cover for night shift. Abby sighed when she closed her eyes after turning over. Trying to clear her mind on the recollection of what happened the other night with Carter. The guilt has really got to her. She opened her eyes wide in surprised when the phone rang and leaned over to the bedside to reach for it.

"Hello" Abby answered.

"Hi, you sleep well?"

"Not really"

"Oh? Still cranky eh?" Jake asked chuckling away "Anyway I need to talk to you, can we meet up when you finish work?"

"No, I have other plans" Abby got out of bed and walked to her wardrobe. She placed her phone on her shoulder wedging it with her ear and pulled out a top.

"Oh right, I guess you're meeting Carter again then?" Jake snapped

"No" she snapped back "If you must know I'm meeting Susan ok? I've gotta go and get ready for work" She walked to her bedside "Bye!" Slammed the phone down. Abby grunted in sheer frustration "Men!"

Abby walked quickly down the steps through the rain after her ride on the EL. She spotted Neela stood outside JumboMart looking bewildered.

"Hey" Abby greeted

"Morning" Neela replied in her British accent.

"Erm… you coming in for coffee?" Abby pointed at door

"I suppose" Neela replied unenthusiastically

Abby opened the door, cocked her head to one side to let Neela in first and walked to the nearby queue at the coffee bar.

"What's bothering you?" Abby asked, nudging Neela waking her from her daydream.

"Uh-huh" Neela shook her head, pursed her quivering lips as she was close to tears. "Living with bloody Ray Barnett!"

"Ah!" Abby nodded sympathetically "I did say you were _nuts_ moving in with the guy"

"I hardly get any sleep!" Neela sobbed "He's always got his bloody rock band practice at all hours, they all got keys to get in and they even come in when Ray's not there"

"What? So much for privacy!"

"I can't take it anymore!"

Abby puts her hand her coat pocket, pulled out a tissue from a little handy pack and gave her it. "Here…"

"How am I going to concentrate on my job with no sleep? I'm gonna kill a patient at this rate" said Neela blubbering with her bottom lip sticking out.

"Hey… shush" Abby placed her arm round Neela giving her a hug. "I help you find you some place elsewhere"

"Morning, how about the pleasure of Dr Ray Barnett buying you two beautiful ladies some coffee?" the rocker asked, coming from behind, pouting his lips trying to give them a sexy look…

Abby and Neela both sneered at Ray

"What?" Ray giving his innocent look, chewing his gum "What did I do?"


	9. Little Soldiers

**Chapter 9 – Little Soldiers**

John Carter sat at his breakfast bar drinking coffee, reading the morning paper.

"Oh I see the cat's got the cream!" Said a voice from behind. It was Sandra, His once weekly cleaner.

"Huh? Sorry?" Carter replied turning to Sandra, looking puzzled.

"I see you got lucky then?"

"Erm... I don't see what you're getting at?"

"I erm… found a used erm… you know" The cleaner raises her brows and mouthed "condom under the bed…"

"Oh!" He laughed and blushed with embarrassment.

Carter shook his head, turning round and smiled. He picked up his cup and drank out of it whilst glancing at the newspaper. He was struggling to read the article because he was too distracted, thinking about the other night, making love to Abby. She was a fantastic lover and she was fantastic that night. It was a mind-blowing encounter once again.

"I guess you know then… Doctor?" Sandra's voice woke him up from his daydream.

"What?" He responded shaking his head.

"About the split?"

"What split?"

"Are you ok? You seem very distracted this morning…" Sandra laughed, "I'm on about the condom! It has a big split in it"

"What! You're kidding me!" Carter jumped out of seat and looked in the bag. "Shit!" He started to feel frantic and ran his hand through his hair, trying to come up with a solution.

"Mmm I think you make a great daddy" the cleaner smiled. John Carter stopped and stared at the cleaner thinking what she had said.

"Thanks Sandra for noticing that split… I better get off, I've got business to take care of.

Carter got in his Wrangler Jeep. Started the engine and paused for a moment gripping both hands on the steering wheel, with his mind playing…

'_Abby, the woman I probably always had loved would not oblige to have children, meaning if she was pregnant would she abort it? Like she did with her ex-Richard's child? She has this big stigma over about her having children by having fear that they would inherit her mothers Bi-Polar disorder. I would love her to be the mother of my children. Yes it was a big shock when Kem announced that she was pregnant in Africa. It took time to sink in with idea of fatherhood, but it was a definite yes… I still brood over babies, maybe a good way for me to come to terms with losing my son Joshua, stillborn… but hey! The sex with her took place 2 nights ago, there's still time for her to get the morning after pill… now I have a choice – Be a complete bastard by not telling her the she'll have my long waited child… or be a honest friend, advise her that she may need to get the emergency pill…'_

* * *

It was late morning Abby was stood in the drug lock up doing the stocktaking; it was like a 'detention' for interns. It must be one of the most boring jobs in the hospital.

"Susan said I would find you here" Said a man's voice; it was Carter leaning against the doorframe.

"Hey"

"You ok?"

"Uhuh" Abby replied pursing her lips, writing down the figures

"So you've been a naughty girl then, Abby?" Carter chuckled putting his hands in his doctors white coat.

The brunette placed the clipboard down on the counter. She turned to him, resting one hand on the hip and her head titled to one side looking up at him raising her brows.

"I've been a naughty girl all week"

He chuckled nervously back at her. "What did you do naughty to do this then?"

"Not important, Carter"

"Well it must be, to land you in this on your break!"

Abby rubbed her forehead "I don't want to discuss it, thank you… Did you want something?"

"Yep, We need to talk…" Carter said hoping she would respond instead of saying the usual _There's nothing to talk about, Carter…_

"Ok… What is it?"

He stepped in to the lockup, shutting the door behind him. She raised her brows as she is suspecting that privacy is needed.

"You know about the other night?"

"Hmm how can I forget?" Abby chuckled, rolling her eyes.

"I have no regrets, ok? And sorry I was an asshole yesterday…"

"Carter, you're always an ass! That's why I like you…"

They both laughed.

"Well erm… this morning my cleaner found the condom"

"Oh nice! She had a glimpse of your little soldiers?"

"Well no, they've escaped…"

"Huh?" Abby paused to think chewing on side of her lip and took a hard swallow "Err… are you telling me the…"

"Split" Carter interrupted "Yep"

"Oh? Erm… oh god, ok" Abby nodded and raised her hands up, lays them flat on against his chest, giving him the reassurance "I'll go and get the morning after pill…"

"Ha… I thought you'd go mad," Carter looking relieved

Abby stood up on her toes, placed both hand on his cheeks and pulled him towards herself to plant a kiss on the lips. She pulled away looking into his eyes.

"Thank you…" she mouthed.

He stepped aside to let her leave the room and unaware that they were both being watched…


	10. Skin II

**Chapter 10 -Skin II **

Abby strode along the corridor muttering to herself with her head looking down at the clipboard. She is unaware that Jake is standing at the other end the near the nurses station, finishing his conversation with the new chief resident Archie Morris and notices Abby heading towards the area.

"See you Morris," Jake said, swinging his rucksack onto his shoulders then starts walking towards her and he stepped aside purposely barging into Abby, almost knocking her off her feet.

"Ugh!" Abby yelped, winded by the impact. The clipboard in her hand goes flying up in the air and clattered when it hits the ground. "Jesus! Watch it!" The startled brunette winced when she rubbed her rib where he had hit her. She was shocked realising who had bumped into her "Oh…? Hi… I didn't realise that you were still here?"

Jake doesn't reply, looking up and down Abby, giving her a cold, disapproving look and walked away forcefully nudging his shoulder against hers.

"Uh" Abby moaned, closing her eyes and clenched her teeth when her small frame stumbled off balance again.

"Jake? Jake! What's wrong?"

He continues to walk, ignoring her. She is standing there with her mouth slightly opened, narrowing her eyes, stunned at his behaviour. She shook her head thinking _'Jeez… what's the hell up with him?'_

Abby squatted down to pick up the paper work scattered around on the floor.

"Let me help you with this" Neela said, bending over beside her "What was that about?"

"God knows Neela, sometimes I can't work men out"

"Hmm" Neela nodded and gave her a sympathetic smile. "Abby"

"Yup" Abby turning her head looking at the young doctor.

"Are you doing anything after work?"

"Yes I am… I'm meeting Susan at Ike's"

"Oh…ok" Neela nodded, gave a disappointed look.

Abby carried on picking up the paper and cocked her head to look at Neela

"Are things still that bad at Ray's?"

Neela nodded again

"Hey… why don't you join us? I'm sure Susan wouldn't mind"

"Really? Are you sure?" Her face brightened up.

Abby nodded

"Great, I'll be there"

"You look like you're desperate to get away from the place!"

The two interns got up and headed to the admit desk. Susan, Kovac and Sam standing about discussing about a patient. Morris still gloating about his promotion to Pratt, who is shaking his head in disbelief and Jerry is frantically trying to answer all the phones.

"Jerry where's Frank?" Susan asked in a whiny voice.

"Code Brown Dr Lewis"

"What?" She replied giving a sour expression. Susan shook her head and walked over to the board checking the admissions. Susan glanced at Abby, who is waving the clipboard and placed it in the drugs tray. Susan walked over to the two interns, carrying a big wad of files under her arm and handed over them one each.

"Abby, there's a patient needs suturing in Treatment Room 3, bring Jane along with you and Neela, patient in curtain 4 – Hypertension"

* * *

Abby walked into the treatment room and froze on the spot after recognizing the patient. Jane bumped into her from behind.

It is CJ, the teenage boy involved in her abduction, which took place a month ago. He was laid on the gurney with laceration on his cheek. He looked on in her direction.

"How ya doin' bitch?"

Abby stood by his side, snapping on the surgical gloves and leaned over to examine the wound ignoring his greeting.

"How this happen?"

"Some sucker slashed my fuckin' face, ma'am" C.J. replied, "You don't remember me do ya?"

Abby paused and pulled herself away from the gurney and turned to Jane.

"Can you get me the suturing kit please?"

"Sure Dr Lockhart" the medical student replied. She walked out of the room.

Abby again turned to the boy and placed both hands on her hip looking assertive.

"How can I ever forget you?" She snapped, frowning and pouting her lips "You and your so called buddy put me through hell that night!"

"What ya expect bitch, you couldn't save my bro!"

"Your brother may still be alive now if you guys weren't so fucking proud to bring him in!" Abby protested.

The teen snapped, "Fuck you bitch!"

Abby flinched and shuts her eyes tight; C.J.'s voice gave her a flashback of that night.

Flashback: Abby in the back of the SUV, in her scrubs, covered in blood… A young man with gunshot wounds bleeding to death, lying in front of her… She is exhausted, performing CPR for over an hour, trying her best to revive him… She fears they will kill her if he dies… C.J. waving his gun at her…He yells at her "He ain't dying bitch!" Abby frantically giving chest reps…

Jane walked back in to the room with the suturing kit and arched her brows at C.J.'s attitude towards her supervisor.

"Here you are Dr Lockhart…"

Abby doesn't hear her.

"Dr Lockhart? Hello?"

Jane puts her hand on her shoulder to get her attention. Abby jumped out of her seat, as she is woken from the flashback.

"Oh yes…" Shaking her head and took in a deep breath, blew it out from her mouth. "Thank you"

"Oh damn, I've forgotten the local anaesthetic!" Jane slapped her forehead.

"It's ok Jane, I don't need it" Abby whispered, giving an evil smile. She knows its time to get even with C.J., by stitching his face without numbing the wounded area!

"Eh? What she say?" C.J. asked, leaning forward screwing up this face.

"Nothing C.J… I'm going to do some stitches on your face and you're a tough little guy, so you should stand a little pain…"

Abby leaned over to the patient again and started suturing the wound. The boy gritted his teeth trying to withhold the pain when she pierced his skin with the thread.

"Ow! You're hurting me bitch, you're hurting me!"


	11. Girl's Night Out

**Chapter 11 – Girls' Night Out**

Abby made her entrance in to the lounge, walking to her locker, singing to herself and swinging her stethoscope.

"Another day, another dollar" Susan quoted, sitting at a table applying on her make-up. "I see Neela coming with us"

"Ah yes… if you don't mind?" Abby pulled a bag out from the locker

"Of course not, more the merrier!" Susan chirped, applying on the lipstick. "I think the night out will do us all good!"

"Uh huh… Give me 10 minutes, I'm going for a shower and change" Abby said heading out the door. The door handle turned before she reached for it and stepped back.

"Hey! I'm running late, can I meet up with you guys in Ike's?" Neela asked popping her head round the door.

"Sure" Susan replied. "Abby…"

"Yes Susan?" Abby stood half way out of the door.

"I haven't bothered telling Weaver about you and Jake"

"Oh?" Abby raised her brows in surprise. "Thank you and erm… I'm still working on resolving the issue"

Susan nodded and smiled at her.

* * *

Abby and Susan, both walk across the road heading towards Ike Ryan's. A voice shouted from behind.

"Wait up you two!" Neela shouted, running across the road trying to catch up with them.

"Well I guess we go to the other bar then…unless you both want to start here?" Susan asked

Abby and Neela both shook their heads "Nah!"

The three women stroll along the busy street, laughing and chattering heading to the next bar.

"So Neela, have you found another place to live yet?" Susan asked

"Nope… I'm not paying $1000 a month for one-bedroom apartments"

"Jeez… a thousand dollars!" Abby winced at the hefty price." I don't even pay half that for my place"

"Hey Carter!" Susan shouted as she sees him walking towards them.

"Hey" Carter smiles at them, rubbing his hands together.

"Isn't your home that way?" Abby said sarcastically, pointed the opposite direction.

"I left my wallet at work"

"Ah! That's when you realised you couldn't get on the EL!" Abby laughed.

He chuckled with embarrassment and he then made eye contact with Abby, she gave him a little smile.

"I guess I'll let you girls go and have fun"

"You bet!" Neela shouted

They arrive at the bar; the music was so loud they couldn't hear themselves think. Someone had selected a Heavy Metal band on the jukebox. Nothing but screeching guitars riffs.

"I'll get the drinks!" Susan shouted, "What you want?"

"I'll have a light beer!" Abby replied

"What?" Susan mouthed unable to hear her.

"A LIGHT BEER!" She yelled at the top of her voice.

"Neela?"

"Same Again!"

They got their drinks and walked to a table in the corner by the windows.

The Music stopped after a crash of drums.

"Jeez… thank god for that!" Susan probing her finger in her ear.

The other two both laughed at her.

"Don't you like Heavy Metal Susan?" Abby asked, taking a swig of her beer

"No… I like Bon Jovi, Mmm he's sooo hot!"

"Bon Jovi is a rock band!" Neela laughed, "Talking of rock band, Benny's at the bar, I'll be back" She gets up and heads to her friend.

"So Abby… what's it like having a toy boy?" Susan asked out of curiosity.

Abby almost choked on her drink "Sorry?"

"You heard me"

"Oh erm... ok" She grinned.

"Is that all you can say?"

"What do you want me to say?"

"Well… what I mean a younger guys have a lot of stamina," Susan said, trying to keep a straight face.

"You're right about that, it's all wham bam thank you mam! I'm bored with him already, even after a month. I try to direct him on making love but he doesn't do that, no foreplay, no anything, just straight forward sex!" Abby coughed with embarrassment admitting that her sex life isn't up to her standard.

"Gee… Abby… I'm sorry" Susan gave her a sympathetic look and laughed "I guess Carter hasn't lost his touch then?"

"Susan!" Abby shouted looking shocked.

"I think it would be great if you two got back together"

Abby tried to ignore Susan's comment by watching Neela walking back to their table.

"That was Benny, Ray's friend"

"Oh is he in his band?" Susan asked

"Oh yes… I think he's cute!"

"I'm off to the ladies room" Abby rose up on her feet and headed to her destination.

The brunette walked along the lobby to the ladies room. She felt a firm grip on her arm, then a hard yank that forced her whole body to be slammed against the wall. She lets out a yelp.

"What the f…!"

"You bitch! He knew there were something going on between you two" His hand still firmly gripping her arms.

"Eddie?" Abby gasped, she was shocked seeing it was Jake's brother; she met him at the Scanlon family christening. Her eyes were wide and staring.

"He knows why you've been avoiding him…"

Abby shook her head in confusion.

"What do you know? Has he been running to you crying cos I didn't give him 5 minutes of satisfaction?" She said in a sarcastic tone.

"He saw you kissing that son of the bitch!" Eddie snarled angrily.

Abby opened her mouth in exasperation. Eddie puts his face close to hers. His breath reeked of bourbon. Abby pulled her face in disgust and gritted her teeth trying to free her wrists pinned against the wall.

"Let go of me!" She begged, "It was nothing, it was only a thank you kiss…no big deal!"

"I'll give you a big deal!" He threatened her and lets go one of her wrist. Eddie swung the back of his hand across her face.

"Ugh!" she yelped with her face looking away, wincing at the throbbing sensation on her jaw. She turned her face grimaced with pain to look at him "Bastard!"

Eddie hits her again. This time his ring on his hand catches the side of her mouth causing it to bleed. The stinging pain from the cut on her lip has made her eyes well up.

Abby cried. "Please let me go…"

Eddie backed off by letting go of her wrists. She was trembling with fear of not knowing what the drunken man would do next. He watched Abby rushing off.

"Watch your back…" He rasped.

Abby entered the ladies room, stepped into a stall. Shuts the door behind her quickly and locked it. She leaned her back against it and tilted her head back closing her eyes. She relieved herself by blowing out air from her mouth and broke down in tears.

Abby came out of the toilet, wiping her nose and walked to the wash area. She looked at herself in the mirror and leaned forward to inspect her wounds. She pulled down her bottom lip to see the deep cut where it had impacted against her teeth.

"Shit!"

She opened her handbag and started to rummage inside it to get her make-up out. Abby pulled out a cigarette; her hand is shaking and struggled to light up. She saw herself again in the mirror and started cursing.

"Shit!" She cursed putting her hand on her forehead then slammed the palm of her hand on the mirror, the humiliation made her cry again.

Abby walked back to the bar. She stood on her toes to look over the crowd, to see if her friends still sat at the same place. As she makes her way to them, she nervously looked around for Eddie, no sign of him; he must have left…

"You want another drink?" Neela asked shouting over the loud music.

"Please" Abby replied. She is surprised they haven't noticed her face. She must have done a good job disguising the bruising on her jaw with her make-up. She feels too ashamed to tell them what had happened on her way to the loo and thinks it best left unsaid….


	12. One Thing After Another

**Chapter 12 – One Thing After Another**

Abby puts her hand under the shower to check the temperature of the running water. She untied the bathrobe and stepped in. She is standing under the showerhead wetting her hair and then ran both hands through it letting out a sigh. She reaches for the soap and lathered herself with it, rubbing it all over her body, along her arms then she winced when her hand ran over her wrists. They were very sore and bruised from Eddie's grip. She hardly slept all night with being so wound up about the incident and trying to work out how to deal with Jake…

Abby stood in front of the bathroom sink wrapping her wet hair in a towel. She turned on the cold tap, reaches for the toothbrush and squeezed toothpaste on it.

"Oh!" She moaned and her face winced, the toothbrush had caught the cut on her lip.

"Bastard" she muttered.

She grabbed the towel and gently patted her mouth with it. She hears her phone ringing from the lounge. She dashed to answer it.

"Hello?"

"Abby? It's your mother"

"Oh… hi" She rolled her eyes in surprise.

"How are you?"

"Um… I'm ok"

"How's the weather over there?" Maggie asked.

"It's erm..." Abby turns to looks out of the window and raised her brows "Snowing!"

"The reason I'm phoning you is to check if you were still living there"

"I'm still here…" Wrapping her finger round the telephone cord "You think I'd up and leave without telling?"

"Yes Abby, maybe want to get away from your dysfunctional family"

"I do care about you and Eric, it just…" Abby shrugged her shoulders trying to think of something without offending. "You both can be hard work at times… anyway how is he?"

"Ok" Maggie replied "Anyway I'm ringing to say your cousin Rachel getting married"

"Oh great! I'm pleased for her… marrying Tom right?"

"Yes and she wanted to send you an invitation"

"Yes she can send it here"

"Isn't it time you got settled down dear? You are in your mid-thirties, times running out"

"Mom!" Abby pulled a face in disbelief

"When am I going to be a grandmother? Well I nearly was if you hadn't got rid of Richard's baby"

"I've gotta go…" Abby snapped, she can still hear Maggie babbling on when she puts the phone down on the receiver, her mother's last words were…

"_I'll see you at the wedding!"_

Abby stared at the pictures of her family; she puts both her hands on her head and sighed. Her thoughts were still miles away when she headed to the bedroom to get dressed. She opened the chest drawers and looked up at the mirror. Abby had to look at herself – to see if her cut on her lip was still prominent. She placed her hand in the knickers drawer and froze in shock.

"Oh shit!" She said, placing her hand over her mouth "I forgot to take the pill!"

* * *

Abby is tapping away on the PC at the admit desk and notices Wendall, standing in front of her, putting her files on the counter.

"Morning Dr Lockhart"

"Morning Wendall" Abby replied

"Hey Jerry can you page Dr Carter for me" Wendall asked

"I'm sorry he's not here, he flew out to Africa last night"

"What?" Abby said, turning to the burly admissions clerk.

"He said he had to go for some sort of emergency"

"Is it something to do with Kem?" Wendall asked out of curiosity

Jerry shrugged his shoulder.

Both Carter's ex-lovers shook their heads in disbelief.

Abby turned back to the PC and spotted Jake entering the elevator. Abby leapt up from the chair and ran to catch up before the door closes. She slammed her hand on the 'Stop" button and glared at him. Jake stepped back in surprise at her quick entrance.

"What the fuck, are you playing at?" Abby hissed through her teeth. "Your brother attacked me last night thanks to you!"

Jake shrugged his shoulders trying to give her the innocent look and then focusing on the cut on her lip. "He did that?"

"Yes! He gave me a good pasting for the thank you kiss I gave Carter!"

Abby walked away from Jake to the other end of the elevator, She ran her fingers through her hair and turned to him again. She scoffed at him and shook her head.

"I can't accept your conspiratorial behaviour, Jake" Abby said with the tip of her tongue was touching the cut on the side of her lip and sighed, "it's over…"

"Oh?" Jake responded in a soft tone looking disappointed. "I guess I'll take that position in San Francisco then"

Abby stepped forward towards him and stopped to think about what Jake said.

"Were you considering staying here at County because of me?" She narrowed her eyes.

Jake nodded "Or I was going to ask you if you would move to 'Cisco with me?"

Abby laughed out loud "You got to be kidding me? Are you crazy? We've only been seeing each other only a month!"

"I love you, I'm in love with you"

"No no. NO! You can't do this, this isn't happening" Shaking her head and putting her hand up like a stop sign. She stepped back to the control panel and pressed the stop button to deactivate it. The door opens. Abby collided into the protesting crowd, moaning about the hold up in the elevator.

"MOVE!" She shouted.


	13. What Are Friends For?

**Chapter 13- What Are Friends For?**

"Has anyone seen Neela this morning?" Susan asked rounding up the interns for a quick meeting.

"No" Abby replied, shaking her head and looked around at the others.

"Ray?"

"Search me Dr Lewis, I didn't see her at home this morning"

"I guess we'll have to start without her!" Abby snapped, in an abrupt tone.

She stepped back when everyone turned to look at her, she knew what everyone was thinking _what's her problem?_ She folded her arms and looked down at her shoes, pursing her lips, avoiding eye contact with them.

"Thank you Abby!" Susan said, frowning at her. "Right, remember eye contact with patients at all times when you introduce yourself, when you explain the diagnosis to them, ok? You can all go now"

The group dissembled and Susan stepped forward, shook her head at Abby.

"Abby I think we need that talk now" said Susan, screwing up her nose. "We didn't get the chance last night, shall we go in the office?"

The two doctors entered the office; it was dark and unused, Susan reached for the switch on the wall to turn on the lights. The flickering of the fluorescent lighting made Abby winced as it aggravated the sensitivity of her tension headache.

"I'm sorry Susan" Abby apologized, rubbing her temples.

"Look Abby don't jump down my throat, I have notice the bruising on your lips and jaw line" Susan sat down and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Did Jake hit you?"

"No"

"Well who did it then?

"It was Jake's brother" She shamefully looked away.

"His brother! Why his brother?"

"Well obviously Jake was upset about seeing me giving Carter a kiss yesterday"

Susan gasped, trying not to smile.

"Anyway Eddie attacked me on my way to the ladies room"

"Jeez… I thought you were a bit quiet when you came back, why didn't you say something"

"What is there to say? I thought I'd deal with this myself"

"I'm surprised you haven't gone to the cops…?"

"So I erm…dumped Jake this morning"

"So I guess that's it then?"

"Erm... Nope" Abby replied leaning against the sideboard and looking up at the ceiling "Gee! Carter really gonna thank me now!"

Susan arched her brow looking intrigued.

"Carter came to me yesterday to say that the… the…" Abby took a hard swallow trying to bring herself to say it "the contraception had failed, so I kissed him thank you and said I would go do something about it"

Abby took in a deep breath and Susan opened her mouth in surprise.

"And this morning I realised I had forgot to take the emergency pill…" She wiped under her eye, trying not to break down and cry. "It's too late Susan… It was 3 days ago… since we did it"

"Oh I'm sorry" Susan rose up from the chair and gave Abby a hug.

"I guess I'll just have to wait…" Abby sniffed "for my next period…"

"If it comes to the worst, I'm sure Carter would be thrilled" She said, rubbing her arm with reassurance

"Huh! You don't know how I'm feeling…" Abby snapped, she sighed and apologizes "I'm sorry, I've had so much happening this week"

"It's understandable"

"I guess I'd better get back to work, I have a patient waiting for results"

Abby broke away from their hug and opened the door to leave the room.

"Thanks Susan… for listening" She said, giving a sad smile.

"Don't mention it, what are friends for...? I think you'd be a great mom!" Susan grinned.

* * *

"Take these 4 times daily with food and see your doctor in a weeks time" Abby said, advising her elderly patient "And here's your discharge letter"

"Thank you"

"Take care of yourself, bye" Abby grinned

She walked to the admit desk to put a file in the out tray and picked up a form. She placed a pen in her mouth and watched Susan pacing up and down the ER. _'Mmm bet she wished never taken the Chief position… oh yes I might that cigarette now it's quiet…" _She then saw Jake walking towards her _oh god!_

"Can you sign here for me?" Jake asked

"Please? Lets have some manners here young man" She looked at him in disparagement. She squiggled her signature, whipped the form up and gave it to him.

"I hope you get what want," Jake whispered to Abby, nudging her arm.

"Abby, if you're not busy, can you go and find Neela" Susan asked worriedly

"Hasn't she come in yet?" Abby frowned with puzzlement knowing this was so not Neela to come in late

"I've tried her phone, pager, you name it!" Susan ranted on.

"Ok calm down Susan! I think I know where she might be…" Abby said, rushing off to the lounge to get her coat.


	14. Cold As Ice

**Chapter 14 – Cold As Ice**

Abby trampled through the thick snow settled on the ground in Archer Park. She stopped to take a breath and bends over to rub her calves, even though she has strong legs from everyday running about in the ER, walking on the snow is like sand on the beach, it is hard work…

She carried on walking with her hand guarding her eyes; the blizzard was darting into them. Her face is red and numb from the cold; her body is well insulated by the thick coat she's wearing and her hat is keeping majority of her hair dry. She spotted Neela at the expected place; the outdoor ice-skating rink, her favourite chill out, a place she likes to get away from this harsh world. She was sat on the bench taking her skates off.

"I thought I might find you here…" Abby said, taking her gloves off to pull away a strand of wet hair sticking to her face.

Neela looked up and pursed her lips.

"Everyone's worried about you"

"Oh are they? I didn't know that they cared" Neela replied in a sarcastic tone.

"Neela!" Abby scolded at her. "How could you say such thing like that?"

"I'm going to get fired, aren't I?"

Abby shrugged her shoulders and sits next to Neela on the bench.

"I don't think so… Susan knows what you're going through," Abby said, putting her hand on the younger woman's shoulder for reassurance.

"Well I've had enough, I going to bring my stuff here and camp out on this bench"

"What! Are you crazy? You'll freeze to death"

"Well I've got no place else to go"

Abby got up from the bench and turned to Neela

"You're coming home with me!" She grabbed Neela's hand and pulled her up.

"Are you sure? I mean last time, you couldn't wait to get rid of me"

"Huh? Neela it wasn't like that, remember I had post traumatic stress from the kidnapping, I needed my own space"

"Ok, but what about you and Jake? You both need the privacy when it comes to you know what" She grinned, thinking she could cope with their noise than Ray's rock band riffs.

"We're finished"

"Oh? I'm sorry," Neela said giving a sympathetic look.

"Don't be sorry" She smiled.

They both leave the bench, walked along the snow-drifted park. Abby spotted two kids playing on the frozen lake.

"Jeez! You got to be kidding me" Abby nudging Neela, pointing at the direction.

"Oh my god! We better tell them"

They both rush through the blizzard to the lakeside; their presence had startled the Children.

"Get the hell out of there!" Abby shouted at the boy standing on the ice. "What the hell are you thinking? Are you stupid?"

"What are you gonna do about it?" the boy shouted back "It ain't gonna break!"

"Please, come back, carefully" She pleaded, then turned to the other kid looking exasperated "What the hell you guys thinking?"

The kid laughed, "We're only having fun, maybe a game of dare!"

Abby scoffed in disbelief and looked at Neela.

"Come on Neela, help me here"

"Come on! Get your bloody arse over here now!" Neela shouted in her posh English accent.

"Come and get me," the boy shouted, stamping his feet trying to be clever, laughing and giving hand gestures. The boy moved in closer to the edge and started to show off, dancing. The ice beneath his feet starts to crack and his whole body dipped straight in to the icy water. They all gasped in shock.

"Jesus! Oh my god!" Abby panicked "Neela, call 911!"

Neela opens her bag to find the phone, pulled it out and punched in the numbers 9-1-1. The dialling tone is heard when she placed the phone on her ear.

They can see the boy bobbing up and down trying to get out of the water. He goes down again.

"Emergency! Fire and Paramedics please, at Archer Park, boy, fell through frozen lake" Neela giving the details.

Abby strutted around Neela thinking what to do next. She gets on all fours and carefully patted the ice in front of her to check if it strong enough to bare her weight.

"They're on their way!" Neela shouted

"Hurry up!" the boy cried standing next to the two doctors.

"Ok! I'm just checking if it's safe for me to go" Abby replied and turned to Neela "I want you to hold my ankles, in case I go down"

Neela nodded "Ok" She said, leaning forward to take hold of Abby's ankles.

She shuffled forward carefully towards the hole, She can hear her heart pounding rapidly and giving out little blows to calm her nerves.

"Oh god… this is crazy!" Abby moaned, shaking her head, shuffling a bit more.

The boy comes back up to the surface, gasping for air. It has startled Abby and she reached her hand out to him.

"Grab my hand!"

The boy reached his hand out to hers; she then felt the ice beneath her, starting to crack away.

"Shit! Neela… Neela! Pull me back… quickly… quickly!" Abby shouted, "Aah!"

Her tiny frame plunged in to the icy waters. She was gone… She could feel the pressure of the water in her ears, the underwater was silent, and the only thing she could hear, was herself screaming inside her soul. The freezing lake was so cold; it felt like knives stabbing into her.

Abby rose to the surface and gasped for air. "Oh! Oh!" she cried, trying to breathe, the freezing water has paralysed her. The weight of the boy attached to hand drew her back under again. This time she found herself trapped under the ice and started to panic, frantically trying to find the hole to get out, to get back to the surface for air again.

The EMT and the Fire Dept plough through the snow to the lakeside. The crew stepped out of their vehicles.

"Hurry!" Neela shouted, "We've got two people in the water now, boy and a woman"

"Ok leave it with us" the fire chief responded.

All the crew members gathered around pulling out and laying out their equipment.

Abby got weaker and weaker trying to breakout; her body goes into a paralytic mode from the hypothermia, and starts to lose her consciousness.

Two fireman kneeling over the hole, they manage to find Abby and they pull her body out of the water and placed her on the stretcher. Neela gasped in relief. They carried her lifeless body over to the lakeside for medical examination.

"I'm a doctor, I'll check her out" Neela said.

She placed her fingers on Abby's wrists to check for her pulse, _no pulse_, fingers on her neck, _no pulse, _and Neela bites her bottom lip to stop herself from crying.

"I'll have to do CPR on her, can you bag her?" Neela asked EMT Dumar.

Neela placed both hands on Abby's chest and started doing reps. EMT Dumar squeezes the bag for air. Then she repeated the reps again. Placed her fingers again, _still no pulse._

"Come on!" Neela cried, she is frantically repeating the chest reps again.

"Come on Abby, comeback…"


	15. Cyanotic

**Chapter 15 – Cyanotic**

"_Bleep, Bleep!" _Alerted the dispatch radio.

"_County General, this is dispatch for status update. Over."_

Susan walked to the radio and picked up the hand receiver.

"Dispatch, County General's on open status. Over"

"_10-2, General"_

She puts the receiver down and walked to the other side of the admit desk.

"Jerry, can you call Abby and see if she had any luck finding Neela?"

"_Bleep, Bleep!"_ The radio alerted again.

"_County General, how do you read? Over."_

Susan walked back to the radio and picked up the receiver again.

"Read you 10-2. Go ahead, dispatch."

"_General, implement drowning protocol. Two casualties alert, Boy and a woman both critical, fell in frozen lake at Archer Park, Over."_

"On stand by, Over." Susan replied

"Trauma 2 & 3 are free, we can put them in there" Luka said.

"Ok, let's round up at the ambulance bay" Susan commanded

They all snap on their gloves in preparation for the casualties to arrive.

A siren wailed from the distance, the decibel gets higher as the Paramedics nears the hospital.

Neela sat next to Abby laid out on the gurney in the back of the ambulance. She had difficulties trying to push an IV, struggling due to the EMT's driving erratically at high speed causing it to rock side-by-side and bumping on the uneven roads.

"Shit! Come on!" Neela shouted feeling frustrated, fiddling with the tubes.

"We're nearly there," said EMT Dumar squeezing the air bag.

The driver slammed on the brakes, which sent Neela flying against the driver cabin. She gets up in a daze and stumbled. The EMT opened the door - Susan, Luka, Sam and Chuny standing waiting to assist. Neela stepped out.

"Neela!" Susan shouted at her surprise then looked at the victim "Oh my god!"

"Abby?" Luka said.

The other Ambulance pulled up.

"That be the boy…" Neela said.

EMT Doris Pickman stepped out from the back of the vehicle. "We've got DOA"

Neela puts on a painful expression after hearing the bad news.

They pull the gurney out of the Ambulance and quickly pushed Abby into the ER.

"She's cyanotic!" Neela cried, "It's all my fault… BP's 32 palp, pulse is weak, she's bradycardiac, heart rate's 38"

"What's the temp?" Luka asked.

"80, I managed to revive her, she wasn't breathing or had a pulse. Her lungs were full of water"

"Put her in trauma 3, warm her up or we'll lose her"

They threw few layers of blankets over her body. The doors of the trauma room swing open and positioned the gurney. They all gather around, pulling out wires and tubes.

"The warmed IVs are here," Sam announced, hanging them up.

"We'll need a pleural lavage to warm her heart" Luka placed his stethoscope round his neck

"Good idea!" Susan squeezing the air bag. "What happened Neela?"

"The boy was messing about on the frozen lake and fell through… Abby was kneeling to reach him and I was holding on to her ankles, the ice gave way when she got hold of the boy. She went in…" Neela sobbed, "It's all my fault!"

"Why is it your fault?"

"I wasn't gripping onto her hard enough" Neela looked way; she noticed a few colleagues gathered around behind the door, watching in shock.

"I'm not getting a pulse," Sam said, holding Abby's neck.

The heart monitor gives a lethal rhythm.

"Come on Abby, don't give up on us now" Luka puts his hand on her chest and pushes it. "Stay with us!"

The monitor bleeped the normal sinus.

"She's back"

"Good! Lets start the lavage now!" Susan said, with the stethoscope in her ears.

"Keep the IV going," the Croatian doctor instructed. "And Sam watch out for the re-warming shock"

"Ok" She looked at Luka with jealousy when he is holding Abby's hand and leaned over stroking her hair. She knew they had a history together, knows that deep down he stills cares for her…

Outside in the corridor, Susan catches up with Neela, who is rushing off to go somewhere to cry alone.

"Neela!" Susan shouted for her attention.

The Indian doctor paused on the spot and clenched her face as she turned to her boss.

"Where the hell were you?" Susan asked "Jeez! You've put Abby's life at risk!"

"Well I did say it was my fault"

She shook her head "No Neela, it isn't, I'm sorry I've shouldn't have said that"

Neela puts her hands in her coat pocket and sighed.

"I'll have a chat with you later, there's so much going on right now"

"I guess you still want me to work now?" Neela asked with her head bowed down.

"Well yes! We're short staffed here!"

"Dr Lewis" Jerry said, leaning over the counter, waving the phone to her. "Long distance phone call"

"Ok I'll take it" She walked to the admit desk and turned to Neela "Speak to you later, ok?" Susan took the phone from Jerry and answered it.

"Hello Dr Lewis here"

"Hi it's Carter"

"Carter! Thanks for leaving me in the lurch at short notice!"

"Sorry, I had to see to an emergency over here in Kisangani"

"Yeah trying to patch things up with Kem" Susan said sarcastically

"What? What are you on about? There's no Kem here, the hospital camp is experiencing problems at the moment, they're threatening to remove it, so I am trying to work out where to relocate it"

"Oh I'm sorry for jumping conclusion, well… On everyone's behalf"

"Everyone's behalf? They're thinking that I've gone running to Kem?" Carter said smiling and looking puzzled "No-no she's got engaged to someone else and living in Paris, so I was calling to say I may have to stay here a little longer"

"Gee thanks, thanks for letting us know"

"You sound stressed out than ever"

"Well you could say that," Susan replied "We are seriously understaffed here"

"Ok, so in general. Is everyone ok?"

"Well… erm… it…" Susan stuttered to avoid telling him the bad news

"What is it Susan? I know that tone"

"I really don't want to say it down the phone" Susan clenching her teeth trying not to say anything.

"Susan!"

"Well... erm…" Giving out a nervous "Ha" trying to bring herself to tell him.

"It's Abby, she's critical"

"What! What happened?"

"She got cyanotic trying to save a boy in a frozen lake…"

"Oh my god!"


	16. Fix You

**Chapter 16 – Fix You**

**Disclaimer:** This chapter title inspired/lyrics from Coldplay's "Fix You

It was silent, no phones ringing. No shouting from irate patients and is unusually quiet in the ER especially for a Friday. The staff won't be holding their breath, they will be expecting revellers staggering in from the local bars with alcohol-related injuries later on. Morris is leaning over the counter, trying to impress an attractive patient telling her about his promotion.

"I am the new boss here," Morris said, winking at her.

"Morris, get a life" Susan said, interrupting him and slamming her files next him. "I need you to do these reports by tomorrow"

"What?" he replied and turned back to the woman, she was gone. He looked around frantically for her. "Where she go? Damn!"

"What a jerk!" Pratt chuckled and Ray joined in with the laughter.

The Ambulance bay sliding doors opened, a weary male come rushing in.

"Carter?" Susan looked at him in surprise "I didn't expect you to be here until tomorrow?"

"Yeah well I managed to get the next flight back" He replied, he was looking rough from the long flight, he was unshaven and his hair is ruffled. He was wearing a black t-shirt and jeans. He did not have the time to sort himself out. His main priority was to get the hospital to see Abby.

"I'll come with you, I need to fill you in with the details"

"Sure"

Susan and Carter both walk down the corridor heading to the elevators. He reaches for the 'up' button.

"I can tell that you do still care about Abby" She grinned.

"I've never stopped…" He replied looking down at his feet and looked at Susan to give her a smile "How is she progressing?"

"Well… slowly, she is in intensive care, she not out of danger yet"

The doors slid open and they both step inside.

"You're telling me she's in coma?" Carter said huskily

Susan nodded and watched him taking a big yawn.

"Oh great it's matter of waiting, she may wake up tonight, tomorrow, next week, next year or never"

"Calm down will you" She puts her hand on his shoulder "We will have to take one day at a time, her incident happened at 9.30 this morning so she's been out for 9 hours, it's a matter of playing by ear"

The elevator doors slid open again and they are on the ICU floor. Susan and Carter step out and walked along the corridor.

"What the hell was she thinking?" He asked, shaking his head.

"Carter, I think you would do the same if you were in that position"

"True"

"In here" Susan opened the door to let him in the room first and followed him.

He froze on the spot, looking at Abby. She was laid out on the bed hooked up to the life support machine. He walked to her side and bravely looked at her trying to hold back his emotions. She has a trachea tube inserted through her mouth to help her breath. Her skin tone was blue-ish due to the poor circulation from the hypothermia. Carter placed his hand on to hers and lifted it up. He then slipped his hand underneath, the palm of her hand and clasped to hold. She was cold, cold like death…

_When you try your best, but you don't succeed  
When you get what you want, but not what you need  
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep  
Stuck in reverse_

_When the tears come streaming down your face  
When you lose something you can't replace  
When you love someone, but it goes to waste  
Could it be worse?_

He leaned over to plant a kiss on her forehead. It felt cold to touch on his lips, it had felt strange, she is always warming to kiss. He used his free hand to stroke her hair; his fingers were tangled in it. Her long hair was soaking wet when she came in, it had dried by itself naturally and without it being brushed, had made it straggly.

_Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you_

_High up above or down below  
When you too in love to let it go  
If you never try you'll never know  
Just what you're worth_

Carter is still holding her hand and looked at Susan who is standing on the opposite side of the bed. She sympathetically smiled at him. He felt a twitch in his hand and looked on with amazement.

"You ok?" Susan asked, frowning at Carter's behaviour.

"I… I felt that" He smiled "She moved her hand"

"Did she?" Susan asked and pulled out a light from her lab coat pocket, leaned over and placed her thumb on Abby's eye. She pulled up the eyelid and shines the light into it. She examined and repeated the same on the other eye.

"They're clear… She's waking up" She said putting her light back in her pocket. "That's good news, I'll go and inform the ICU team"

_When the tears come streaming down your face  
When you lose something you can't replace…_

"Abby?" He said softly

Abby was struggling to open her eyes. She was heavily sedated, kept drifting in and out of her sleep. Again she was trying hard to flicker her eyes open.

_When the tears come streaming down your face  
When you lose something you can't replace…_

"Abby… it's ok you're safe"

She opened her eyes again to focus at him.

_Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you…_

The ICU team rushed into the room. Their quick entry had startled Carter like if she was crashing. They gathered round by her bed, checking her vitals. Her eyes were racing round the room watching them poking and prodding her. She lets out an "Mmm" and trying to get their attention by signalling her eyes down to her mouth. 'Remove this god-damn tube'. The door opening catches her attention from the side of her eye. It was Neela entering the room. Abby eyes followed her to Susan, she then focuses on her best friend and she is standing with her hands in her lab coat pockets greeting the younger doctor. Abby tries to hear what Susan was saying, but everything was all confusing. She closes her eyes and opens them to look at Carter. He was deep in conversation with the other two. 'Carter? I thought he was in Africa? How long have I've been out? Is this a dream?'

"Abby I need you to cough when I pull the tube out from your windpipe" One of the ICU doctor said, leaning over to her face, tapping on her shoulder making she sure was aware of his actions. She coughed when they removed the tube and one of nurses places a straw in her mouth, to moist her dry throat.

"Can you breathe ok Abby?"

"Yes" She replied in a raspy voice and turned her head to Neela "The boy?"

Neela stepped forward with her face grimaced and said "Sorry"

"Oh?" Abby sighed, disappointment is written all over her face.

"I'm really sorry Abby" Neela squirmed "It's all my fault for you going in the water, I'll never forgive myself"

"You didn't do anything"

"But?"

"I knew the consequences... I was stupid to go after the boy... but…" She protested in a husky tone cutting her words from her shortage of breath "I'm doctor... it's my instinct... to save someone's life"


	17. Truce

**Chapter 17 – Truce**

Abby lay comfortable on the bed, they moved her to another room, she's stable enough to be out of intensive care. Carter was sat on the end of the bed, massaging her foot.

"That should help the circulation"

"You are so good to me John" Abby whispered, enjoying his hands touching her, it felt so wonderful and sensual for her, she needed it, she needed the warmth from a man, she never really got warmth from Jake. Carter was different from other guys, he would give full attention.

"Well I must be a good friend to go to Africa and come back within 24 hours!"

Carter stood up and walked to the window, he raised his hand and uses his fingers to separate the vertical blind. He peered through the gap to look out, his eyes raced around the dark of night. Tiredness has caught upon him; He lets out a big yawn.

"It's still snowing" He commented and opened the blinds for Abby, so she can view the snowfall.

"Wendall was looking for you, Jerry said you cleared off to Africa" Abby croaked, and chuckled "You should have seen her face, she was cursing you, you had her thinking about you running back to Kem"

"What? Really" He replied in surprise. "I bet you joined in the cursing with her!"

"I must admit I did felt anxious, especially what happened the past week, I needed to resolve some issues with you"

"Ah I see you've got some unfinished business with me?" He nodded his head playfully "I need to go back to Africa pretty soon to try relocate the hospital before it's too late, maybe we can talk more when I come back"

"You be careful" Abby pleaded "I'm not fit enough to return the favor, flying out to you!"

He walked round the bed and picked up his bag. "You get some rest, I'm going to get a shower and maybe 40 winks…" He leaned over to kiss her forehead. "I'll be back soon"

Abby watched Carter leave the room, she turned her head to look out of the window and watched the snowflakes dance around in the wind. She falls asleep…

* * *

Jake put his hand on Abby's and gently squeezes it. She fluttered her eyes open with being heavily sedated.

"Hey" she croaked looking at his direction.

"Hey, How are you feeling?"

"Uh… erm… silly question"

"Yep" he laughed, "You feel crap I guess?"

"Mmm" Abby replied giving a little smile.

"I'm sorry for being an ass with you"

"No…" She rasped, trying hard to swallow, her throats dry "Water… drink…"

Jake walked to the other side of the bed to pick up the beaker with a straw in it. He puts the straw in her mouth for her to suck. She sighed after a good drink.

"No… I'm the one who should be apologizing," She said taking a painful swallow; her throat is sore from the crike from the trauma room. "I've been unfair giving you hot and cold signals"

"But what my brother did to you was unacceptable! I'm sorry about that, he gets heavy handed after a few drinks"

Susan walked into the room, Jake and Abby stopped in silence.

"Hey guys… Oh I'm sorry am I interrupting?"

"No, Dr Lewis" Jake replied

"I've come by to observe, I won't be long" Susan looked at the IV drip and filled in the update on the chart. "How are you feeling Abby, Do you need anymore painkillers?"

Abby croaked, "Yes please, the strong stuff…"

"I'll get you some Dihydrocodeine, that will knock you out! Back in a sec" She smiled.

They stopped in silence for a minute.

"So are taking that post in 'Cisco?"

"Yes" he replied to her with his face covered in sadness. "I start in the New Year"

"I'm sorry things haven't worked out between us" Abby said reaching for his hand

"You've haven't tried to make it work"

She glared at him in disbelief, half opened her mouth to protest and then realised that she shouldn't get worked up so she relaxes her head back down on to the pillow. She saw Susan coming back in to the room with her meds.

"Here you are… let me help you get up a bit so you can take them with ease"

Susan leaned over to pull Abby up; Jake stepped in to ruffles the pillows and positioned them. They carefully lay her back down.

"Oh! So sore" Abby winced.

Susan handed the pills and water over to her. Abby popped one in her mouth and taking a sip of water to wash it down but she struggled to swallow them. She nearly gagged because she got the bitter taste, didn't down them quick enough.

"Thanks"

"No worries, I'll check on you again in a couple of hours" Susan said, she waved as she walked out through the door. "Buzz if need anything"

"Look Jake, I think you're a really great guy but…"

"Ah!" He interrupted "Is it the 8-year age gap?"

"No… I wouldn't have got involved with you in the first place if that wasn't the issue"

"So what is it then?"

"I don't think were compatible enough"

"But I really like you very much"

"Jake, you have a new career life ahead of you, you go ahead take that road, maybe one day you'll meet a beautiful girl and settle down with her…"

"But you're the beautiful…"

Abby closed her eyes for a second, looked away sighing at his response.

"Why are you making this hard for me?"

"I know what your problem is…"

He caught her attention; she pricked up her ears and looked at him.

"You're still in love with someone else and you can't seem to let go of him…"

She looked at Jake with a deadpan expression, knowing that he is absolutely right and too cowardly to admit it.

"I… I… need to rest, I can't believe we're having this conversation," She said turning her head away again and closed her eyes

Jake stood beside Abby for a minute and leaned over to kiss her cheek.

"I guess I'll see you around" He said taking one last look at her, he turned to the door and saw Carter standing in the way.

"Jake" He nodded gently "I hope you're not harassing her"

"I'm not" Jake replied in a low tone. "Yeah don't give me that lost puppy bullshit thinking I wouldn't stand a chance with her"

Carter chuckled at him

"Well I've already had the chance, ok"

That wiped his smile of his face.

"You're telling me you and Abby were together?" Carter asked looking shocked and confused. "No one mentioned it"

"We kept it quiet"

"Ah I see, now I know why…"

"Well it's over now, she's all yours, happy now?" Jake nodded at Carter and walked out of the room.

Carter sat down in a chair next to the bed, he picked up a magazine left on the bedside, and it is a woman's magazine. He carried on reading with curiosity of its contents.

* * *

6.34 am - Abby woke up with a coughing fit. Carter jumped out of his chair, the magazine on his chest fell to the floor. He was trying to figure out where he was, only realising he fell asleep on the chair. He leaned over to her to see if she was ok.

"John?" Abby coughed again. "How long have you been here?"

"Since Jake left," he replied, "Are you ok? Do you need any analgesia?"

"I'm ok," She answered reaching over to the bedside to get her drink. "My lungs are irritable at the moment"

"Why's that? From the icy waters or smoking?" He said sarcastically, still wound up with the truth about Abby with Jake.

She gave him a forced smile and lays back onto the mound of pillows.

"Very funny" She croaked, "Don't you start as well? I had enough of Jake making comments"

"Hmm… I see you two were very cosy then?"

She turned to him quickly in surprised "You know?"

"He told me"

"I might have known" She rolled her eyes

"So that explains why you have been avoiding me or being uncomfortable"

"Yes but it's not you" she said dryly "It's just… I don't know"

Abby rubbed her head trying to concentrate on what she is trying say, she still the effect of her meds.

"I guess you disapprove of me now?"

"I am shocked but…" He replied. "You're only human"

"Oops my halo's slipped," She said putting her hand in front of her mouth. "In fact I don't think I've ever had one!"

They both laughed and Abby goes into another coughing fit.


	18. One Month Later

**Chapter 18 – One Month Later**

_One Month later…_

_It is one week before Christmas…Abby has recovered from hypothermia and not to forget, the turbulent week she had, Her life has been looking on the bright side in previous weeks and She is back at work as normal. Neela is now lodging at her apartment and Carter still away in Africa. Will things stay on the positive side for her?_

"Morning Neela" Abby said walking to the dining room table in her long john top and her hair is messy, the definite got out of bed look, desperately in need of grooming. She picked up her cigarette packet and lighter. She pulled out a cigarette and lit it up. She picked up the newspaper and strode in to the lounge area towards the window. Abby pushes the window up to open it and sat on the sill to let the smoke blow out in to the fresh air.

"Have you turned up the heating?" Abby asked frowning in puzzlement, flapping her top to cool off.

"No" Neela replied pouring a kettle of hot water into the two mugs. "Why?"

"I dunno, its just feels rather hot in here"

"Maybe you're coming down with something" Neela walking towards Abby with a mug in her hand. "Sorry it's tea, we're out of coffee"

"That's ok, I'll get some more from the Jumbo Mart when I finish work" Her cheeks sucked in when she took a drag of the cigarette and blows out the smoke. Whilst reading the newspaper, Abby takes a sip of her drink and nodded her head looking impressive "Mmm nice tea"

"You're welcome" Neela said walking towards Abby and probed an electronic thermometer in her ear

"Jeez! Neela what the hell are doing?" She jumped, startled by her roommate's actions

"Checking your temperature" Neela answered looking serious and pouting her lips, concentrating on the reading the digits "We don't want you to be sick again"

"God… I don't know who's worst, you or my mom!" She said jokingly

"98 F, You're fine"

"I feel it"

"Did you get your mail on the table?" Neela pointed at the table, on her way back to the kitchen.

"Nope" Abby took one last draw and stubbed the cigarette end into the ashtray. She marched herself to the dining room table and picked up an envelope addressed to her. Postmark reads 'Minnesota'.

"Hmm I know what this is," Abby said inserting her finger in to the corner of the envelope and ripped the flap open. She is right; it is an invitation for her. The card is cream colored with raised gold ink print. It reads:

----------

_Mr & Mrs Robert Wyczenski_

_request the pleasure of the company of_

_Dr Abigail Lockhart and Guest_

_at the marriage of their daughter_

_Rachel Jane with Mr Thomas Krane_

_at St Paul's Church, Minneapolis, Minnesota_

_On Saturday 14th February at 1 pm_

_Reception: The Plaza Hotel, Plaza Boulevard, Minneapolis, Minnesota._

_R.S.V.P._

_Note: A discount on rooms booked for the night at the hotel._

_--------------_

"I'll take a guess that's an invitation to your cousin's wedding?" Neela asked buttering her toast.

Abby nodded in response.

"You want some?"

"No thanks" Abby replied putting her hand on her stomach to rub it. "I feel a bit sickly"

"Are you sure you're ok?" She asked looking at Abby, taking a bite of her toast. "So did you and Rachel get on well?"

"Oh yes, we used spend most of the summer vacation together when we were about 5 or 6, it was great especially getting away from Mom and Dad's constant bickering"

"I can imagine"

"Auntie Dorothy and Uncle Bob are the nicest people you'll ever know, I think they were only people ever spoilt me" Abby leaned her backside against the back of the sofa, folding her arms. "Sad thing is… I never got to stay with them again after my father left because I had to look after mom and Eric"

"I'm sorry"

"That's life" Abby shrugged her shoulders, looked down to read the invitation again. "Valentine's day? What a unforgettable date to married!"

"Mmm Valentine's day, that day doesn't mean anything to me" Neela said looking glum

"You will meet someone one day" Abby said walking to the kitchen area and stuck the invitation on the fridge with a novelty magnet. She turned round and grinned at Neela

"I think you and Ray should get together, you make a cute couple" Abby joked, purposely to wind her friend up.

"Ha ha!" Neela gave out a forced laugh and stormed off to the bathroom.

"Oops I must have hit an nerve end," she said huskily, pulling a face gritting her teeth. Abby reached over the kitchen surface to grab a pen from a pot at the windowsill. She walked across to the calendar hung up on the pantry door, she paused to realise that she doesn't have the next year's calendar yet. So she squiggles in the December notes section to remind herself and then look at the rest of December's dates. She puts her finger on today's date - 17th, she then ran her finger up the calendar and stops on the day with a red ring round it - 9th.

"Oh my god!" Abby gasped putting her hand on her month, She had just realised that December 9th was her period due date and she hasn't had it yet. She dropped the pen on to the floor and staggered to the table; she sits down with her hands resting her head, then covers her eyes, muttering to herself

'_This can't be happening'_ shaking her head _'No no I expected this, I knew this gonna happen, no-no I don't know for definite yet, I mustn't get worked up'_

Abby pulled her hands way from her eyes and started tapping her finger on the table to control her nerves. Her lips are quivering and her eyes are red, welling up with tears. She takes one big hard swallow…


	19. Nausea

**Chapter 19 – Nausea**

Abby is standing in the lock up storeroom. She reached up to the top shelf for the pregnancy kit and puts it in her pocket. She leaves the room with a set of file under her arms and headed to the admit desk. She placed them on the counter, standing next to Susan.

"Hey Abby, what was the outcome of your patient who collapsed on the floor?" Susan asked tucking her bob style fringe behind her ears.

"Well it turned out that he had Aplastic Anaemia, his white blood cell count was 5.2" Abby replied putting her hand on her chest, makes an expression if she's going to belch "We've sent him up for a blood transfusion"

"Oh good work" Susan nodded then noticed Abby's looking alarmed. "Are you ok?"

"No I'm not, will you excuse me"

Susan's eyes followed Abby rushing off down the corridor.

Abby busted in to the ladies room and darted straight to the nearest available toilet. She started to wretch. She is squatted in front of the toilet with one hand holding her hair back. She leaned over again to throw up and shuddered from the bitter aftertaste of the bile that left her mouth. She wiped her cold clammy forehead with the back of her hand. Pulled a toilet tissue from the dispenser and wiped her mouth with it. She stays put for a few minutes to get over her sickness. Abby lets out a breath, then overhears the door slam open, footsteps running in to the next stall. The person started to wretch. Abby started to wonder who is in the next toilet, she gets up and reached for the flush button and presses it. She stepped out of the stall. She didn't shut the door behind her when she came rushing in. The brunette turned to the next stall, pushes the door ajar and she sees a woman with a nurse coat with long curly blonde hair hanging over the toilet. Abby recognized the image.

"Sam, are you ok?" Abby asked wryly. She gently folded her arms leaning against the doorframe.

Sam turned to Abby pulling a toilet from the dispenser and wipes her mouth with it.

"Yeah I'm ok, I think there's this bug going round" Sam replied defensively

"Oh really?" She said huskily, smiling at the nurse "and what bug, may that be?"

Sam shrugged her shoulders.

Abby raised her brows, looked around the room and looked at Sam again

"Would that be a _baby_ bug going round?" She asked

Sam groaned and dropped her shoulders "That obvious is it?"

"Not for the others no…" Abby moved to the sinks, turned on the cold tap and leaned over to drink from it. "To me yes… I'm going through the same"

The nurse stood there in shock, she cannot believe what she is hearing, Abby's pregnant?

"So who's the father? Jake?" Sam asked, with her curly hair bouncing "Well I heard a rumour that you were seeing him"

Abby's mouth opened in disbelief after hearing Sam mentioning about her personal business with Jake, sounds like that everyone gossiped about her private life!

"No…" She replied in a low tone "it's Carter's"

"Carter's! I didn't know you two were back together?"

"We're not, its just erm… one of those things that happened"

"I think I can work that one out" Sam smiled.

"So does Luka know about…" Abby asked signalling her eyes at Sam's tummy "the baby?"

"No-no I haven't told him, I trying to come to terms with it" Sam replied putting her hand on her forehead and confessed "I didn't really want another child, I am finding Alex a handful as it is"

"I'm sure Luka would be thrilled to find out you're carrying his child"

"Huh, I don't think it will solve our problems, we're going through a bad patch at the moment"

"Oh I'm sorry"

They stood in silence

"So does Carter know about you?" Sam asked turning on the tap to wash her hands.

"No, I need to do test first to make sure it positive" Abby looked down in her pocket pulled out a long thin shaped box "Oh talking of the test, I have one here"

"Well you're in the right place!"

"I guess I better get this done and over with then!"

Abby walked back to the stall.

"Do you want me to leave or want me to stay for a bit of moral support?"

"Can you stay please?" Abby asked, popping her head round the door "I might need to use your shoulder" She shuts the door.

Abby is leaning against the door in the cubicle, staring at the pregnancy kit. She unwraps it and quickly muttered to herself the instructions _'Place stick during midstream'_ She sighed and shook her head. Abby unzipped her pants and sat down on the toilet. A minute passed on and nothing happened.

"Are you ok in there?" Sam shouted tapping on the door

"Yes I'm fine!" Abby replied in frustration. "I can't pee!"

The ladies room door opens and Susan came strutting in.

"What's the hell's going on here? I am missing two members of staff here" Susan asked, "Well one missing now that I have found you Sam"

"Shit" Abby quietly muttered to herself, rolling her eyes and placing her hand on her face.

Susan walked to the _engaged_ stall, knocked on the door and pulled a face. "Eww that smell who's been sick?"

"We both have" Abby and Sam replied at the same time.

Abby placed the stick at midstream and puts it back in the box. Grabbed the toilet paper, dabbed herself, puts it in the loo then pulled up her pants. She presses the flush button and unlocks the door.

"Hi Susan" Abby smiled and walked to the sink, places the box on the surface and washes her hand.

"Abby what's going on?" Susan asked, she moved to the sinks and peered over to look at the box. She gasped after reading the label and looks at the Abby who is forcefully smiling back at her.

"Well we'll just have to wait 5 minutes, then I can tell you what's going on…"

* * *

"5 minutes up" Sam said, sitting upon the surface looking down at her watch.

It was the longest 5 minutes of Abby's life it felt like eternity. She is standing there staring at the box like a nervous wreck. She can hear her heart pounding rapidly and breaking out in cold sweat, she is clammier than she was being sick 10 minutes before.

"I know it positive," Abby said, rubbing her hands frantically to calm her nerves. She doesn't know why she so worked up, maybe a fear of finding out the truth. Susan looked excited and impatiently waits for her to look at the result.

"Go on Abby, have a look," Susan said nudging her friend.

The fearful brunette lets out a nervous sigh and reaches for the box. Her hands were shaking and she feels the sweat on her lips leaking into her mouth. She pulled out the stick and glanced at it. The stick had a little window, which illustrated the result. The result shows two blue lines.

Abby froze in shock with her eyes widen; she thrusts the stick in her hand towards Susan, who takes it from her. Abby turned her back to them and she hysterically broke down in tears with her hand covering her face…


	20. Bad Coffee Good Talk

**Chapter 20 – Bad Coffee, Good Talk**

Abby walked in to the lounge, her eyes are red and puffy from the crying. She only just noticed Luka is sitting at the table, tapping his pen against his chin in deep concentration. She opened her locker and pauses when she sees the packet of cigarettes on the top shelf. Abby closed her eyes, letting out a sigh and knows that she needs to quit for the baby's best interest. She slammed the door creating a loud clang that made Luka jump

"Going out for a smoke?" He asked looking over his shoulder.

"No I… I've erm… quit" She smiled clasping both her hands together.

"Really?" Luka chuckled at the surprise.

"Erm… yes I have" she replied uncomfortably trying to make an excuse to avoid telling the real reason. "Well you guys here gave me a second chance to live, so I thought I'd make the most of it"

"Wait until your mother turns up, then you will start smoking again!" The Croatian laughed out loud.

Abby laughed at Luka's comment, it brought back the memory when they were together and her mother turned up out of the blue. The stress had made her start smoking again. The brunette walked to the drinks counter, picked up a mug and poured herself a coffee from the pot. She turned round to lean back against the side, taking a sip of her drink.

"Uh! That tastes foul," Abby said, pulling her face in disgust.

"Not you as well, Sam was complaining about the coffee earlier" Luka got up and walked to Abby. He takes the coffee form her and sniffed it, drinks it "Tastes fine to me"

Abby poured the remaining coffee down the sink. She squatted down to the fridge to find a can. She spotted a can of Coke in the door and takes it.

"How things in general for you?" Abby asked opening her can.

"Crap" Luka replied sitting back down "I really don't understand her moods at times, Sam complains that I don't talk"

"Well… communication is probably the most vital part of the relationship"

"I do talk but its not enough for her"

"Luka, Sam is still trying to get to know you"

Luka shook his head and pursed his lips.

"You need to open up a bit more," Abby said, looking down at the can, fiddling with the ring pull.

"Yes she says that I keep things to myself" He said in his thick accent "Well she is keeping something to herself"

Abby frowned "Meaning?"

"I think she is pregnant"

"Oh?" Abby reacted surprised, pretending as if she doesn't know.

"Explain the moods, the sickness, the coffee," Luka said, waving his arms round in protest.

Abby lowered her head, hoping that her symptoms not that obvious, she walked to his side and puts her hand on his shoulder "Talk to her"

"Hey" Neela interrupted as she walked in. "Carter will be back on Christmas Eve"

Abby raised her brows and half smiled at the news.

"Good" Luka said getting up from his chair "About time, I fed up doing everything at the moment, I'll leave you ladies to it"

Neela looked on in admiration watching Luka leave the room. "He is gorgeous… You were mad to dump him"

"It was complicated" Abby replied

"Anyway how are you feeling? Have you…?"

"Yep" she replied and nodded gently. "It was positive"

"Oh dear" Neela said, giving a painful smile "Are you happy?"

"It's too early to say yet, I am still coming to terms with it"

"When are you going tell him?"

"When I'm ready," Abby said looking pitiful "I appreciate that you don't spread this to anyone"

"Of course not, you know me better"

A pager bleeps and they both look down to check who it's for.

"Mine" Abby sighed "I gotta go…"

* * *

A Helicopter is lowering to the land and it's rotor blades are spinning, circulating the freezing winter air. Abby, Sam and Luka standing about together on the rooftop, they are all clenching their teeth, shivering and their hair blowing all over the place. They are all wearing yellow disposable pull-off scrubs and protective glasses.

"Lets go!" They all push the gurney, crouching down to the helicopter, when it landed safely. The door opens and a flight nurse steps out pulling the patient out.

"31 year old male drunk driver, MVA, drove into a wall without seatbelt"

"My count on three… one, two, three!" Luka said. They lift the patient on to the gurney and push it towards the elevator

"Head and chest trauma, He had 4 liters, Pressure's 60 over 35, pulse 110 and thready" says the Flight Nurse

The elevator door closes and they go down. Luka prepares an IV, and Sam squeezes the air bag.

"Diminished breath sound, he's in fib!" Abby shouted listening through the stethoscope. She quickly climbed up on the gurney and straddled on to the patient. She clasped her hands together, placed them on the victim's chest and started to thrust the force of her arms.

"One, Two, Three, Four, Five…" She counted her reps.

The elevator doors opened again, they are on the ER and quickly push it down corridor. Abby still on top performing CPR.

"Put it in Trauma 3" Malik shouted

"Lower your head Abby!" Luka warned her, She dipped her head to prevent from cracking her head on the doorframe.

"Lets get the O Neg moving now! We'll need blood alcohol, tox screen and a CT"

The heart monitor continues bleeping out lethal rhythms.

"Give me the paddles!"

"Clear!"

"Turn it up to 300"

"Clear!"

"No pulse"

"320 Clear!"

"Nothing"

Abby noticed Sam looking unsettled and her rosy complexion started to drain to the whiter shade of pale.

"Excuse me, I'm gonna be sick!" Sam shouted and ran out of the trauma room.

"Uh! Don't… you'll set me off" Abby muttered to herself and swallowed some air to battle the queasiness

Luka looked at Abby raising his brows at her looking if he is saying _I told you so_.

"The vic's partner is here," Malik said, popping his head round the door.

"One more… 360, Clear!"

"Nothing"

"Pupils fixed and dilated," Abby said, leaning over, shining the light into the patient's eyes.

"Lets call it"

"Time of death 2.34 pm" She announced

"Abby will you break the news to the partner?" Luka asked

Abby nodded at the attending, she pulled of the disposable scrubs, throws it in the bin and snapped off her gloves. She walked out to the corridor and noticed a woman in mid 30's sitting down, waiting anxiously.

"Ms Blow? Hi I'm Dr Lockhart," Abby said, sitting down next to the woman introducing herself "Your partner was bought in with severe head and chest trauma, his heart stopped when he arrived here, we tried to resuscitate him, we use all our capabilities, but his injuries were too severe and he died, I am very sorry"

"That drunken bastard!" The woman shouted and broke down in tears. "I knew this would happen one day, he's an alcoholic"

Abby pulled out a tissue from her pocket and gave it to the sobbing woman.

"Thank you, can I go and see him?"

"Sure, I'll take you to him"

A wave of nausea came on for Abby, she started to pant and maybe panic. She spotted Malik coming out if the trauma room.

"Malik will you take Ms Blow to see her partner please" She asked and pointed the opposite direction "I've gotta go!"

Abby ran off to the nearest toilet with her hand over her mouth…


	21. Secret Santa

**Chapter 21 – Secret Santa**

_Christmas Eve…_

"From your secret Santa" Jerry hands over Abby an Xmas gift.

"Thanks Jerry" Abby taking the item and looked at it. The size wasn't very big and it was beautifully wrapped, maybe it's a perfume and specially gift-wrapped in-store? She had hoped this present is better than Dubenko's gift she got last Christmas. It was a book called "Rats, Lice and History". She thought she would never get to read it, she did manage to find time for it when was off sick recovering from Post Traumatic Stress from her abduction. Abby chuckled at herself remembering what she had said to Moonlighting med student Jake about working Xmas. She did not know him; he was just someone to cover seasonal staff shortage. Abby quoted _"Next year I am going to invent a family, so I don't have to work Christmas!"_ Oh god! She predicted her own future and could have invented one with him! Abby so pleased it's Carter's baby because he would give his child security and a good future, well she hope so, she must bring herself to tell him, matter of timing it right.

She unwrapped her gift carefully pulling the paper away and sees a black box like a jewellery type case. She gasped when she opened the box; it was a beautiful Swiss 23K gold dress watch. It must have cost hundreds of dollars and it is obvious that she knows who is her Secret Santa is… Carter! No one else here would spend that kind of money on his or her colleague.

"Bling bling!" said Jerry leaning his towering structure over the petite brunette, having a nosy. She smiled at him and puts the gift in her pocket.

Abby walked down the corridor looking for Carter, she noticed that he was in a side room; she stepped forward to the window and sees him looking down smiling at something. She moved sideways to be nosy without being obvious and looked in an angle. She could not see anything but he noticed her presence and waved her in. She nodded back at him.

"Are you looking for me?" Carter asked. He was holding a newborn in his arms "Isn't she beautiful?"

"Erm… Yeah she is" Abby stood there with her mouth wide open with her eyes fixated on the broody Carter!

"Some sad person dumped this baby, how can anyone do such thing to a such precious gift like her" He puts the baby back down in the crib. "Are you ok? You want something?"

"Oh yeah, I just want to talk to you, but it can wait" Abby said, rubbing her hands calming her nerves.

"We can talk now, I'm on my break"

"Ok wanna go for a walk and get a coffee from over the road?" Abby asked doing a pointing gesture over her shoulder with her thumb.

"Sure" Carter replied with his face all lit up.

* * *

Abby and Carter walking down an aisle in the Jumbo Mart, browsing around waiting for the queue to quieten down.

"I'm surprised that you decided to work an Christmas again," She asked.

"Who am I gonna celebrate with? Gamma's not around anymore. I am not spending it my bickering parents"

"Good point" She nodded

"What about you? You going to spend it with Maggie and Eric?" He chuckled; he knew that would wind her up.

"Jeez! Carter I'm not answering that" she sniggered, nudging his arm.

They both join the queue at the coffee bar. They both stand in silence and playfully looking each other – He looked at her, she looked away, she looked at him, he looked away like a couple of teenagers having secret crushes. Carter studied Abby's face thinking that she has a wonderful glow to her complexion.

"Erm if you're not doing anything, why don't you join us for Christmas dinner at my place?" She asked huskily.

"Yeah that be great, I'll love to come and who's on your guest list then?"

"Me and Neela will be slaving away in the kitchen" Abby pursing her lip, looking up like she is thinking. "While Ray, Chuny and Jane drink up the booze"

"Mmm Ray, Chuny & Jane?"

"Yep, unfortunately their families live too far away"

"Ok what time you want me to come?"

"Be there for one o'clock"

"Next please!" The counter assistant interrupted.

"Two large coffees please"

"No erm make mine a hot chocolate please" Abby smiled.

"Are you ill?" he chuckled giving her that look _Abby not drinking coffee?_

"I'm fine, I just fancy hot chocolate for a change" She looks away, shamefully, telling him a white lie.

The counter assistant handed over their drinks.

"Do you miss Doc Magoo's?" Carter asked, taking a sip of his coffee, looking around inspecting the place.

"Sure I do, brings back memories" She winked at him

He blushed and opened the door for her and followed. They were standing about outside the store; Abby is leaning against the wall and Carter is facing in front of her.

"Thank you for the watch" She smiled "It's beautiful"

"What makes you think I'm your secret Santa?"

"Erm… let me think…" Abby said, pulling a cute face "Nobody here would spend that amount of money on a colleague"

He laughed at her; they both cross the road to the ambulance bay and walk to an empty bench. They both sit down. Abby tilted her head back against the wall to look up at the clear starry night. She is moving her lips trying to go over what to say to Carter about the pregnancy, she can feel the butterflies in her tummy. Carter looking at her in admiration attracts her attention by moving her eyes to look at him.

"What a beautiful starry night, doesn't look like it going to snow again tonight…" Abby said, trying to make conversion to prevent the awkward silences.

"Yes it is beautiful" he replied then smiled at her "Beautiful like you"

Her heart jumped, she looked away shyly and cleared her throat.

"So what did you get from your secret Santa then?" Abby asked changing the subject, taking a sip of her hot chocolate, with both hands wrapped round the cup, trying to keep them warm.

"I haven't got it yet, I'm curious what I'm going to get"

"Hmm… yep it's gonna be a big surprise"

"Yeah? You know what it is?"

"Of course I do, I am your secret Santa"

"I'm sorry you lost me? Where is the gift?"

Abby puts her cup down and gets up. She faced Carter who is still sat down. She took in a big deep breath. She nervously unzips her coat, which leaves her pale blouse exposed.

"Give me your hand," She asked, putting her hand out to him, it was shaking from her nervousness, she knows that this has to be done sooner or later.

He raised his hand up and placed it onto hers; she takes hold of it, then pulled it to place it on her tummy.

"This is your gift," She said, rubbing his hand over her bump; He frowned and started to shake his head with confusion.

"I'm pregnant…" Abby announced, swallowing hard, trying to hold back her emotions "with your child"

In shock, John Carter's jaw dropped to the floor and his cup with the contents, fell to the ground, when accidentally lets go of it. He got up to her eye level and looked at her. She looked back into his eyes, she can see they are welling up, he choked back the tears … he was speechless…


	22. Bad Timing

**Chapter 22 – Bad Timing**

"I feel so ecstatic!" Carter shouted with joy.

Abby laughed, she wiped the tear away from her eye. Carter leaned over to give her a kiss and pulled away to look into her eyes.

"Did you decide to go ahead to see if you were pregnant?"

"No way, I had so much going on that I forgot to get the pill and when I remembered, it was already too late"

"I suppose it was meant to be" He chuckled, and then something had dawned on him that wiped the smile off his face.

"What is it?" Abby frowned.

He stood there in silence for minute.

"Carter! What's wrong?" Abby asked in a worrying tone. "It's ok, I am keeping the baby, I'm not going to get rid of it, this is my only chance to have a child, oh sod the fear that it might inherit my family's condition, life is all about taking risks"

"Huh I don't know how I'm going to say this"

"Say what?"

"The timing's wrong again!" He said, turning away and puts his hand on his forehead.

Abby is standing with her hands on her hips, tilting her head and blinking hard trying to listen to what he had to say. She can feel her heart pounding hard against her chest, sensing this is not going to be good news.

"I was going to announce something to everyone at the end of the shift, when we have our little Christmas party in the lounge" He smiled nervously looking down at his hands. "I've handed my notice in, I'm leaving the County for Africa"

Abby started to hyperventilate at the shocking news and she stepped away from Carter shaking her head in disbelief. He stepped forward to her and puts his hand on hers, but Abby whipped her hand away from him.

"Don't touch me!" She growled with tears welling up in her eyes and they flashed with anger

"Abby!"

She scoffed "Huh! I am so fucking please that I followed my own instincts, by not getting emotionally involved with you. Do you know why?"

Carter shook his head to signal her that he does not know the answer.

"Cos I knew you would go and shit on me again!"

"This time it wasn't intentionally, I thought I have no future and no love here, and I didn't think you were bothered about me, so I decided to move on"

"Obviously I haven't tried hard enough…" Abby said walking away, heading back to the doors of the ER, "It's ok, I don't need your help with this baby, and I'll manage on my own thank you!"

* * *

_Inside the ER_

Abby strutted through sliding doors wiping her eyes, she then paced to the admit desk and picked up a file. She fumbled about with the paperwork, not paying attention what she is doing; she is wholly distracted by Carter's news. Abby threw the pen on the counter, stuck her tongue out to blow a 'rasp' and walked off. She started to feel woozy and light headed, next thing Abby is on floor and she has passed out.

"Oh my god Abby!" Susan shouted, she runs to her fainted colleague and squatted down to support her head. "Abby can you hear me?"

Luka and Haleh rushed to their sides whilst everyone in the ER looks on by, chattering and murmuring.

"Lets get her into a exam room" Luka said, lifting Abby on to the gurney with a little help from Susan and Haleh. "We better run some tests on her, I have never known Abby fainting"

"It's ok Luka I know why" Susan nodded pushing the gurney

"You do?"

"Look, I'll deal with her, she's my patient now"

"But I want to know why…"

Carter walked to the admit desk and notices Abby being pushed away on the gurney. He runs to catch up with them.

"Hey! What's going on?" Carter asked, catching his breath

"She just passed out on the floor" Susan replied.

"Oh? Yes… erm… that might have happened because she was very upset with me a minute ago"

"Oh great you got her all worked up, why is she upset with you?" The blonde asked, she has a good idea what might of happened, but surely if she told Carter, he'd be over the moon.

"Well she told me some news" Carter said putting his hand in his pockets "but in return I told her some bad news"

"Will somebody tell me what's going on here?" Luka asked with frustration, feeling he's outside the loop

"So Carter, she did… erm… tell you the news?" Susan asked subtly without revealing too much.

"Oh you know?" He said, looking surprised

"Well yes I was there when she took the test"

Luka raised his brows finally he has worked out what they were on about.

"Is Abby pregnant?" He asked in his thick accent.

Carter and Susan both smiled that the tall smouldering Croatian doctor.

"Oh?" He laughed "Well at least Sam and Abby can be pregnant buddies to go through it together, like shopping and stuff" Luka couldn't think of the English phrase of what he had said.

"Mmm ooh" Abby groaned and lifted her head to look where she is; the only view she has is Susan, leaning over close to her face.

"Abby are you ok? You have just passed out" Susan said in her trademark grin and then she can see Luka standing over on her right nodding his head, then looked to the left, Carter. Abby looks away closing her eyes, feeling hurt; she can't look him in the eye.

"Yes I'm fine Susan, I'm fine" The brunette replied sitting up right.

"Do you want to go home?" Susan nodded.

"No, I'll stay"

"Ok you take it steady, why don't you do the light duties" The blonde puts her hand on Abby's shoulder and winks "Perhaps you can help me set up the party in the lounge"

"Ok…"

* * *

"Where do you want me to put these Dr Lewis?" Jerry asked carrying a crate of drinks.

"Put them on that table in the corner" Susan said standing upon a chair, pointing in that direction.

Abby is opening packets of chips and placing them into bowls on the table. She looked at Susan wobbling trying to balance on the chair reaching for the ceiling, trying to stick balloons up.

"Is that the new dance Susan?" Abby laughed at her boss. She walked to her and watched with her arms folded.

"Don't make me laugh or I'll fall off!"

Susan over-stretched her reach that caused her to lose her balance and tumbled off. Abby reached her hands out to catch her. It happened so quickly instead Susan collided into Abby, which had broken her fall. Abby stumbled back against the wall from the weight of her friend. Susan is positioned in front of Abby, literally pinned against her. With both hands on each side of her head with their noses barely touching each other. They look at each other; wide eyed in shock at the position the fall had put them in.

"I guess it would do some people good to move on" A woman's voice said, coming in through the door.

"Well, yes suppose" A man's voice replied.

Weaver and Carter who came into room and paused on the spot when they see Abby and Susan, especially the position they are in. Weaver's jaw dropped and the side of her mouth tweaked a little smile. It was definite eye-candy for Kerry Weaver! Carter did not look impressive at all. They both walk backwards out of the room and shut the door after them.

Abby and Susan watch them leave quickly. They looked at each other with their mouths open. They both burst out laughing.

"Should have seen their faces!" Abby laughed hysterically

"Oh god, that will get them talking" Susan said also in hysterics.

"Oh let them be, they haven't got anything better to gossip about"

"I'm sorry about that"

"No worries" Abby patted her friend on the back and jokingly said "Jesus! Carter will definitely not come back now!"

Susan chuckled. "Hey yeah Abby, what happened earlier, why did he upset you?"


	23. Party in the Lounge

**Chapter 23 – Party in the Lounge**

The lounge is slowly filling up with staff on their breaks or finishing their shift. There are streamers and balloons hanging from the ceiling. There is food laid out on the table, food brought in by the staff like Neela's Biryani, Luka's Ajvar, and Haleh's Fudge Pie; and not to forget Jerry ordered half dozen monster sized pizzas. The kitchen surface is like a bar, cluttered with Beer, wine, soda and water.

Jerry and Malik are having an altercation over who should be DJ.

"Why don't you put Bing Crosby's White Christmas on?" Frank grumbled at the pair.

"You got to be kidding me!" Malik replied abruptly.

* * *

"So what it's like pashing with another woman?" Morris asked with his mouth full of food. He went mad piling up his plate up with free food.

"I dunno, go and ask Weaver" Abby replied innocently, pulling a face in disgust after having a good view of the contents in his mouth "God you have some nerve mentioning something that didn't happen!"

"I saw you and Susan through the window" He laughed excitingly.

She scoffed at him and walked over to Susan. "Jeez… That's just great Suse! Doctor verbal diarrhoea Morris saw us and spreading the gossip round quick like some contagious disease"

"Oh god! Well that's so typical of him, I know Carter and Weaver wouldn't do it, it's not their nature to do that…"

"Yes typical like I remember Carter was livid when Morris printed off his pictures of Kem from his email and circulated them round the ER"

Susan lets out a chuckle while taking a sip of her drink.

"We better not talk anymore cos I can see the others looking at us" Abby said sarcastically folding her arms and tucked her hair behind her ear. She can see Luka and Sam approaching them.

"Abby, Susan" Luka nodded at the them "I didn't get a chance to say this earlier... congratulations on your pregnancy Abby!"

"Why, thanks!" she replied looking at his towering frame hanging over Sam. He is standing behind her with his arms wrapped round her waist, gently rubbing her tummy. Luka is smiling like a Cheshire cat.

* * *

"So erm…" Morris winks at Susan when he nudges for her attention.

"Give over Morris, go away" Susan said, waving her arms at him with annoyance. "Shoo!"

Kerry Weaver noticed Lewis's behaviour towards Archie Morris. She limped over to her.

"Is there a problem with Morris, Susan?"

"Oh he's just being an ass, he's had a few beers" Susan replied.

"Ok" Kerry said, she puts on a playful smile "I see erm… You and Abby were cosy with each other earlier… I felt kind of jealous!"

"Eh?" Susan shook her head and gave Weaver a sharp look "What? Eww no! It wasn't like that, oh don't you start as well!"

"Anyway how is Morris getting on with his chief residency?"

"Too early to comment, I thought you were joking when you gave him the position"

"I didn't have much choice there were hardly any candidates"

"Pratt would be good for the job but he didn't want it"

"Really?"

* * *

Abby spotted Neela stood daydreaming with a big smile.

"What's the big smile?" Abby chirped, tapping on Neela's shoulder.

"Michael has just phoned to wish me a happy Christmas" Neela replied letting out a gleeful sigh.

"Michael! How is he?" Abby asked with her eyes racing round the room and sees Carter talking away to a colleague. He looked at her direction and smiled. Abby doesn't smile back; she is still staring at him and vaguely hears Neela's reply.

"He's fine, he wishes that he is at home tucking into the big dinner"

"Uh" Abby waking up from her stare and muttered "Oh yes our big task for tomorrow"

"Abby I was wondering if you would like to kiss me?" Dubenko asked wearing a black turtleneck top, he has a striking resemblance of Dustin Hoffman!

"What?" Abby said turning to him, he is standing by her side.

"Under the mistletoe? It is Christmas after all," He said waving a piece of the branch with his curly long hair bouncing.

"Erm I suppose, ok"

Dubenko puts his arm round Abby's neck and leaned over to kiss her. Abby puts her hand on his chest to guard herself, she didn't know that he was going to kiss her like that, she was expecting him to give her a peck on the lips. Dubenko stay put on her lips for at least 30 seconds to a minute and Abby's eyes were moving around with embarrassment.

"Merry Christmas" Dubenko said pulling himself away from the brunette.

"Merry Christmas to you… Ha!" Abby blushed and clears her throat looking around to see who's watching. She smiled at everyone, turned to Neela and whispered "Hmm he's a not bad kisser actually!"

* * *

Morris again walked past Susan and makes another stupid comment. Susan grabbed hold of the bearded redhead and pulled him to one side, in a discreet position away from the crowd, so she can talk to him without being unprofessional.

"Hell Morris will you cut it out for once!" She snapped in a whispering tone "This is not funny, in fact I find this innuendo of yours serious matter, you're the new chief resident, I thought you have some respect, god sake will you grow up!"

"I've had a few beers"

"I don't care, I don't want to hear you making lucid comments or rumors about untrue things. If I hear you say one more thing, I will have words and…" Susan puts on an evil grin "I wonder how you feel, if you were demoted?"

Morris chuckled nervously. He then puts on a serious face and scurries off out of the Chief of Emergency's sight. He accidentally bumps into Abby who is looking furious after hearing from someone else, what he had said.

"Can I have your attention please?" Carter called out, tapping a spoon against his bottle of beer. The bustling noise in the room died down.

"Morris do you have to be so persistent about spreading untrue allegations between me and Susan!" Abby lashed out with anger, her hormonal behaviour takes over and realised that the noise level has gone. She cringed and wanted the ground to swallow up. Susan felt the same too, clenching her teeth. Carter and Abby make eye contact, she raised her brows and he cleared his throat to speak.

"I have an announcement to make, I erm… wanted to say that I am leaving County General for Africa"

Everyone gasped at the shock news; Abby tilted her head down in sadness with her arms folded.

"And erm… I've decided that I want to start a new life there because I want to move on. Things have changed and I can't see myself spending the rest of my life here. I may not be gone for long because I had been told some news so I might need to come back…"

"So what's the news?" Morris interrupted, stuffing his face and half of the food spitting out from his mouth.

"Well erm" he chuckled nervously and looked at Abby. She gave him a little nod and a smile. "It's too early to say really, there's some stuff to sort out, depends what I decide then maybe go back to Africa once it's sorted"

Everyone in the room frowned in puzzlement looking at each other, trying to work out what Carter was on about. Abby dropped her shoulders and rolled her eyes. She walked away, weaving in and out through the crowd, making her way out to the door.

"Merry Christmas… and a happy Hanukkah!" Carter raised his bottle of beer in the air.

"Poor Abby…" Susan muttered to herself with her arms folded "That was a bit insensitive. You jerk!"

Susan noticed Abby making her quick exit from the room, she groaned knowing that her friend is upset and tries to weave though the staff to catch up with her. Carter eyes followed Abby leaving the room and sees Susan making her quick exit too.

* * *

"Abby!" Susan shouted, running outside in the ambulance bay looking around. She quickly walked to the entrance of the bay and looked around. She spotted Abby over the road, outside Jumbo Mart sitting on the bench with her hands covering her face.

"Oh Abby, I'm sorry" Susan said, sympathetically

"I may… I might…" Abby mimics Carter "Listening to him is really cutting me up"

Susan sat down next to Abby who broke down in tears. Susan placed her arm round her, giving her a shoulder to cry on.

"God my hormones are all over the place" Abby sniffed "Susan am I being a brat or being silly about this?"

"God no Abby, you have every right to be upset, it's awful not knowing where you stand"

"This is so not like him"

"Look Abby, you two are as bad as each other at the moment, you need your heads banging together"

Abby nodded as she agrees.

"I think you and Carter need to sit down, and sort it out amongst yourselves"

"Yeah well he's suppose to come round tomorrow" Abby shrugged her shoulders "That's if he decides to turn up… if he does I will try and have a talk"


	24. Christmas Morning

**Chapter 24 – Christmas Morning**

"Hey wakey-wakey" says Neela rubbing her friends shoulders whom is hidden under the covers. Abby flipped the quilt over to reveal her weary head and looked at Neela, peering through her heavy eyelids; She is trying to flutter her eyes wide open. They feel gritty from the tiredness.

"What time is it?" Abby asked in her slurry voice

"Nine-thirty" Neela replied "And merry Christmas!"

Abby shook her head, trying to come back to reality "Erm… yes Merry Christmas to you!"

"I'm waiting for you to get up so we can open the presents together"

"Yeah sure, give me a minute" Abby sat up on the side of her bed and ran her fingers through her hair. She lets out a big yawn "I must have had the best night sleep in ages, I don't know why? I'm stressed out as it is"

Neela smiled "I'll go and make coffee"

"Neela not coffee" She shakes her head "I cannot face the stuff at the mo"

"Oh yes, I forgot"

Abby got up, walked to the window to open the curtains and she looked out at the quiet street. She turned to the dressing a table, picked up the hairbrush and hair band. She looked in the mirror to brush her hair and tied it up. Abby lifted up her t-shirt to look at her stomach, it was flat. She is only seven weeks pregnant; it will be another month or two before it shows the signs of the pregnancy. One thing she has noticed, the size of her breasts, they got bigger! Abby walked into the lounge and noticed a big pile of presents under the Christmas tree, Neela had carefully placed them there.

"I see Santa's been" Abby smiled, walking to the kitchen. She reached for a glass from the draining board and turned to open the fridge door to get the carton of orange juice out. Abby still craved nicotine especially in the morning; She is doing well with her will power not to have a cigarette. Abby drank the juice in one go and put the glass in the bowl. She turned to the turkey on the side and inspected it.

"Turkey thawed out well" She muttered and turned on the oven.

"I'm going to prepare the veg now" Neela said, lifting a bag full of vegetables "Might as well get it out of the way so we can chill out"

"Good idea"

"I'll peel"

"Ok I'll chop!" Abby chirped.

"I wish Michael was here, god I miss him" Neela sighed and looking dreamy at the kitchen sink.

"You do? And do you still have eyes on Benny?"

"Oh yes I like him, thing is I can't sit around to wait for Michael to come back, he could be back next week or next year"

"Yup, you do need a bit of fun in your life"

"Hmm say that again, you've had enough share of fun in your life in past months"

"Where did that leave me? Possibility of being a single mother?" Abby chuckled

"Well I could have been in your shoes when Michael came back few months ago"

"You didn't?" Abby laughed and winked "You are not as innocent as I thought you were"

Neela laughed at the brunette's jesting comment. She watched her friend chopping the carrots and putting them in the pan. Abby paused as she noticed her friend was watching her like a hawk.

"What?" Abby puts the knife on to the chopping board.

"Oh erm… I was thinking that, has it ever crossed your mind that the baby could be Jake's?"

"Yes" Abby replied pursing her lips with her eyes looking up "I don't think it's his because we've been careful, it's just that one time with Carter, the condom split"

"Ok" Neela carried on peeling the potatoes.

"Carter's announcement last night was a bit indecisive, don't you think?" Abby asked curling her top lip, sneering.

"Yup…"

"I really must have that talk with him, if he comes"

* * *

Abby and Neela are sitting in the couch finishing opening their presents, they have left them unopened until they finished preparing the Christmas dinner, have a shower and get dressed. There is a knock on the door. Abby frowned and looked at the clock on the wall. It reads 12 o'clock. Neela gets up and answered the door. Standing there is Carter with his hands full with bottles of wine. Not cheap wine, the top stuff like vintage red. He is looking smart in his dark blue designer shirt and black jeans.

"Merry Christmas" He grinned

"Merry Christmas, come in" Neela waved her arm to signal him in.

He stepped into the lounge and saw Abby in the kitchen area. He noticed that the glow on her face is radiating her aura and how nice she looked, wearing a black v-neck top with her cleavage looking prominent. He noticed there was something looking different about her, in a wonderful way but cannot put his finger on it.

"I guess the invitation still open?" Carter asked.

"Yep, make yourself comfortable, you're a bit early?" Abby commented reaching for the oven gloves.

"Oh right, I'm the first one here?"

"Yes Ray, Jane and Chuny are on early at work today, they should be here soon" Abby replied bending over to check the contents inside the oven. Carter couldn't help noticing her bent over, getting a good view of her backside. He had the urge to grasp her butt cheek. He thought, better not, otherwise he would go home hungry!

"Merry Christmas John" Abby said, straightening herself up and turned to him.

"Merry Christmas to you" Carter greeted leaning over to kiss her on the cheek and pointed his nose up to inhale the aroma of the cooking "Smells great"

Carter opened the kitchen drawer for the corkscrew. Abby nodded and glanced at him holding the wine bottle in his hand. She reached for the wine glass and gave it to him. Abby looks around to see if Neela is nearby, she is setting the table.

"We need to talk" Abby said tilting her head, pouting her lips. "After dinner, ok?"


	25. Christmas Afternoon

**Chapter 25 – Christmas Afternoon (Rated)**

**Disclaimer:** Lyrics "What if?" belong to Coldplay

"I'll carve the turkey" Ray offered, he picked up the knife. He is sporting his usual rocker sleeveless t-shirt. Neela, Chuny, Carter and Jane sitting down at the table, licking their lips at the Christmas dinner laid out on the table. Abby is in the kitchen, finishing making the gravy.

"Get stuck in guys!" Abby announced walking to the table with a jug in her hand. She placed it on the table and sat down. They are all putting servings on their plate and passing round the bowls of vegetables, potatoes or meat to each other.

"So how's ER this morning?" Carter asked after his first swallow of his food.

"Gee Carter, do we really have to talk about work?" Abby said in disbelief

"Well yeah we don't want to talk about it but I can't resist telling you guys what me and Chuny had to deal with" Ray pointing his fork at everyone, eating with his mouth full

"What happened?" Neela asked looking intrigued.

"This geezer came in with superficial burns from his turkey"

"Wow! The bird jumped out at him from the oven?" Carter laughed

"He tried to defrost the turkey in the microwave"

"Yeah and he forgot to take out the bag of giblets from inside of the turkey" Chuny said wearing her favorite bright pink top.

"Oh my god! The pressure from the bag, it expanded…" Abby said curling her top lip trying imagining what happens next.

"BOOM!" Carter interrupted loudly that made everyone jump.

"Jesus Carter!" They all shouted, cursing him. Carter is still laughing.

"It's not really that funny Carter, poor guy maybe scarred for life," Jane muttered, taking a sip of her wine.

"Who asked you?"

Jane jerked back when Carter snapped at her. Abby kicked Carter's leg under the table

"Ow!"

"Don't be rude!" Abby narrowed her eyes at Carter, she gave him the look, she was not happy…

"Is everything alright?" Neela asked everyone trying to change the subject.

"Delicious!"

Abby takes a sip of her 7up and noticed Carter knocking back the wine, unlike him. She is getting concerned about his characteristics… they're out of line… is he really not coping with the pregnancy? It would be damn mean of him to say how wonderful the news and not really meant it. Never lie to Lockhart because she will kick ass if she finds out. She always wants to know where she stands…

Abby always wants truth, even if the truth hurts…

* * *

An hour later, they all finished the festive feast, they were all stuffed, and there were leftovers. It is always best to make too much than less. Everyone got up and head to the lounge and crash out on the couch rubbing their nice big full bellies.

"I'll make a curry with those lefties" Neela suggested to Abby, who is loading the plates and bowls in to the dishwasher.

"Let's have some tunes on" Ray said, looking at the CD on Abby's pile of opened presents, Coldplay's "X&Y" new album and put its in the CD player on the Stereo.

The table is cleared; everything put away, the dishwasher whirring with all the pots in it and everyone chilling out with their drinks. Abby walked in clasping her hands together nervously.

"Carter, shall we?" Abby pointing in the direction of the bedroom. Everyone raised his or her brows looking at her, thinking what she's up to?

"Oh my god she's gagging for it!" Carter jumped up with drunkenness.

"Carter! Not like that!" Abby scolded at him with her face like thunder. "That talk…" she hissed through her teeth.

"Oh yes… let me go to the bathroom first" He slurred.

* * *

Abby is looking out of her bedroom window with her hands on her waist. She is waiting for Carter to come in from the bathroom. She is clicking her tongue waiting anxiously and thinking over what she has to say. She is quite embarrassed at his behaviour.

Coldplay's "What if?" is heard playing from the other room…

_What if there was no lie  
Nothing wrong, nothing right  
What if there was no time  
And no reason, or rhyme  
What if you should decide  
That you don't want me there by your side  
That you don't want me there in your life  
What if I got it wrong  
And no poet or song  
Could put right what I got wrong  
Or make you feel I belong_

Carter walked into the room, Abby doesn't hear him. He is very intoxicated from the red wine he drank and staggered over to sit down on the end of her bed.

_What if you should decide  
That you don't want me there by your side  
That you don't want me there in you life_

"That dinner was delicious" Carter said, his presence had made Abby jump, she didn't released he was in the room, she turned and smiled at him. She sat down next to him.

"I need to know where I stand in all this? It's all too confusing about whether you are coming or going," She asked looking down, rubbing off a smudge or a spill on her pants.

_Ooh, that's right  
Let's take a breath, try to hold it inside  
Ooh, that's right  
How can you know it, if you don't even try  
Ooh, that's right_

"I've handed my notice in, because County won't let me have the time off, if I needed to come back I would do my job voluntarily until a position arises"

"But you are still not making things clear!" Abby said, shaking her head and clenching her hands resting on her lap. "Is it me or my brain not functioning anymore?"

"It's too early days, my priority is Kisangani this minute, the relocating is the problem we're having"

Abby threw her arms over her head to lie down on the bed and lets out a sigh in frustration.

She is thinking _this is no good… great! He's drunk and still not very clear… is he on something? Is he hiding something?_

_Every step that you take  
Could be your biggest mistake  
It could bend or it could break  
That's the risk that you take_

Carter turned and quickly climbs over to straddle on top of her. He is grinning and with one hand he firmly gets hold of both of her wrists that are placed above her head. Abby winced and grunted trying to wiggle to free herself. She is trapped beneath him.

"Has anyone told you how beautiful you are?" He leaned over to kiss her and licked her top lip. She can taste the dry fruitiness of the wine as he explored his forced tongue into her mouth. With his free hand he is tracing it down the side of her body, tracing it up her inner thigh. He rubbed his hand firmly between her legs that made Abby let out a cry. He knows he has power over her now, he knows which button to press to make her weak. Carter moved his head to plant kisses on her neck. He gave her soft gentle blows in her ear and tried to undo the buttons on her pants.

"Will you get off me?" She whimpered, still trying to free herself. "Carter you are still not giving me any answers"

"You want an answer?" Carter said arrogantly nodding his head.

_What if you should decide  
That you don't want me there in your life  
That you don't want me there by your side_

He slipped his hand inside her underwear and massages her roughly. Abby gritted her teeth squirming away from the discomfort Carter giving her.

"I have doubts if this baby is mine?"

"Huh?" Abby gasped in shock, she managed to free her hands and grabbed his wrist to pull his hand away from between her legs. She tried to push him off.

"Get off me!" Abby shouted with tears welling up in her eyes from the humiliation. She swung her arm to slap him across the face.


	26. Bruised

**Chapter 26 - Bruised**

Abby looked at herself in the mirror in the ladies room. She sees an unattractive woman today, it's Carter fault for making feel that way psychologically especially after what she went through yesterday with him. Her eyes are red and puffy, she has never cried so much in short period of time. Of course it's the pregnancy has sent her hormones all over the place. You can't help it, you could cry at something on the TV that isn't sad! Abby had a good reason to cry all night; She hoped that she could hold herself together without getting upset during her shift.

"Morning Susan" Abby said greeting her boss "Ouch!" She winced when she sat down in from of the PC, she is feeling very bruised from the incident with Carter.

"Oh morning Abby" Susan replied and noticed her friend looking uncomfortable "You ok?"

"I think so…" Abby answered, forcing a smile "You have a good day yesterday?"

"Not really, Chuck and I spent the day bickering"

"Oh I'm sorry?"

"And you?"

"Dinner with the guys went ok except Carter, he was a bastard" Abby replied. She looks around and noticed that half of the staff are looking at her "Why is everyone staring at me?"

"Maybe because what you did to Carter's face"

"Oh?" Abby shook her head in surprise "I erm… didn't realised I've hit him hard enough to mark him?"

"Abby! It's not like you?" Susan shook her head in disbelief.

"Maybe they will change their opinions after hearing my side of the story" Abby said reaching for the chart file and looked down at it "Well if you were in my position, you would do it"

"What happened?"

"His behaviour is way out of line," She said signing the chart "Can we go somewhere private?"

They both leave the admit desk and entered in one of the trauma room that is not in use at the moment. The room is a mess, stuff all over the floor, surgical gloves, pull off scrubs, protective glasses, blood, body fluids, wires and tubes.

"What a mess! Where the hell are the cleaners?" Susan muttered looking at the state of the place. She slipped her hands into her lab coat pockets "Oh sorry Abby, go ahead tell me"

"I was trying to have that talk" Abby said chewing on her bottom lip trying not to cry "and he got me pinned down on my bed, he viciously groped me by putting his hand down where he shouldn't have, so I slapped him"

"Oh my god! That's sexual harassment," Susan gasped putting her hand in front of her hand in shock "It's not like him to do that!"

"You want to know what really cut me up?" She said taking a breath, trying to stop her lips from quivering when the tears ran down her face. "He said that he has doubts that he's the father…"

"Oh Abby" Susan opened her mouth in shock and puts her arm round Abby "Look if you need to go home during this shift, let me know, I am surprised that you managed to come in at all"

"Susan, I just have to get on with life" Abby gave a painful smile "I just don't understand why he like this? There is something going on that isn't quite right, I mean Carter is the nicest guy you ever come across, sweet, caring, sensitive and now… he's turned into a monster"

"He's such a Jerk" Susan scoffed "Chuck is too… in fact all men are!"

* * *

Abby is in the drug lock up room, reaching up for some meds, for a patient. She noticed that there was a low supply of Fentanyl, only 250 cc in stock. So she looks at the inventory folder to check who authorised to prescribe them to patients. Abby pointed her finger to read along the document, last delivery yesterday 2000 cc in stock, few signatures recorded to say how much is dispensed last 24 hours – Kovac 100 cc, Carter 50 cc, Carter 100 cc, Lewis 150 cc, Weaver 150 cc and Carter 50 cc again!

_So where the hell is the rest of the supply?_

Abby left the drug lock up to report this problem; she strolled along the corridor and then pauses on the spot. She has just realised something…

_Oh my god! Of course!_

Abby remembered that not long after she first started working at ER six years ago, Carter was addicted to Fentanyl when he was coming to terms with the attack by Paul Sobriki who stabbed him and Lucy Knight. Unfortunately Lucy didn't survive. She remembered his erratic behaviour and it's quite similar to it is now.

_So why is he on it now? Is he still depressed? Even though he has been for a while since the still born of his son and Kem leaving but I thought he might have moved on, how am going to confront him this time with out causing havoc, but why Fentanyl? He must remember the buzz he got from it last time…_

Her heart jumped with she bumped into Carter, when she arrived at the admit desk. She raised her brows when she sees the hand mark on his face she gave him.

"I could do you for an assault"

"I could do you for sexual assault" Abby answered back blinking hard at him with her arms folded "You have absolutely no right to do that to me!"

"You wanted me"

"Huh! You're unbelievable Carter!" Abby scoffed "Yeah you keeping telling yourself that"

Carter walked away ignoring Abby, he is heading towards the triage desk. Abby scooted after him and stepped in front of him.

"Explain your behaviour?" She asked raising her eyebrows

"What the hell are you on about?"

"Your aggressiveness and arrogance"

Carter walked off shaking his head, again Abby catches up and stepped in front of him.

"Are you depressed? You can get help"

"There's nothing wrong with me" Carter said poking his finger into her chest "So back off!" he snapped at her and walked off again.

"I think you're on drugs…" She said huskily standing in the middle of the corridor with her hands on her hips feeling defiant. "Maybe on… Fentanyl?"

Carter turned round to Abby. He leaned forward to give her an intimidating eye-to-eye contact.

"Why's that then?" He asked. Abby lets out a nervous 'Ha'

"Because you are not the John Carter I know…"


	27. Out of Control

**Chapter 27 – Out of Control**

"Can you take this patient?" Carter asked looking agitated, thrusting the chart at Neela.

"Sorry I'm busy" She replied walking past him.

He shook his head and looked around for anyone else. He sees Abby walking towards the admit desk heading to the elevators. She noticed him watching her, the way she moves. Abby looked back at him nervously then tilted her head down to avoid him.

"Take this patient"

"No, I'm dealing with one right now" Abby waved.

"Doesn't look like you are…"

Abby stopped dead and turned round.

"Excuse me?" She tilted her head forward to look up at him.

"Where are you going?"

"I need to go and get the X-ray results" she replied and sneered "Why do I have to tell you what I'm doing, where I'm going?" Waving her arms "You're not my boss"

"I am the Attending here"

"Whoopee do!" She said sarcastically. "I will follow your orders when you cut that shitty attitude of yours" Oh dear… Abby has snapped wrongfully at a senior member of staff. She stormed off to the stairs by the elevators.

Carter watched Abby running up the stairs, suddenly his withdrawal symptoms started to take over him.

* * *

Carter rushed to the Men's room and checked every stall to see if they're empty. He entered the farthest one and locks the door. He is trembling with beads of sweat running down his temples. He is agitated with trying to get his next fix. Carter puts his hand in his lab coat pocket and grabbed a handful of syringes. He opened his fist to look at them, two different types - Fentanyl and an Anabolic Steroid.

A Steroid! Carter is taking them too, for him to cope with the endurance of long gruelling hours he works, with the depression it would make you lethargic that he wouldn't be able to keep up. He feels that they would make him more in control and powerful, you can see why bodybuilders who take them get moody, aggressive and controlling due to excessive testosterone running riot through their system.

He finds his fix less fiddly now that the syringes are pre-filled so he doesn't have to mess about with little vial bottles like he did 6 years ago. Carter pulled off the needle lid with his mouth and rolled up his sleeve. He pulled a strap out from the other pocket and wrapped it around his elbow. Tightened it. He looked down at his arm to study any protruding veins so he can slide in the needle.

"Shit! That little bitch is always right," He muttered to himself. He knows that Abby is very smart woman to work things out especially about her suspecting he's taking Fentanyl. He is thinking _'She needs knocking down to size so she doesn't succeed over me. I might even report her to Weaver, that will make her think'_

* * *

"Susan, have you seen Carter?" Abby asked her boss, who is busy working through the paperwork.

"No" The blonde replied, "I'm not talking to him"

"Oh?" Abby rubbed both hands together "Has he upset you too?"

"Well you could say that, his attitude stinks and I am upset about what he did to you, I can't understand that you still acknowledge him!"

"I've been avoiding him, well I tried to… I just want to help sort out his problem"

"After what he put you through?" Susan scoffed.

"Susan, you know that he's not like that and there is a logical explanation for his behaviour, ok?"

"Whatever you say," Susan said, shrugging her shoulders at Abby and carried on with the paperwork.

"Right… I better go and find him"

Susan looked up again and asked, "Why do you want him?"

"Because he has abandoned his patient in the next curtain," Abby said levering her arms.

"You're kidding me! I hope this isn't the patient that he tried to give to half the staff here?"

Abby nodded "Well the guy is suffering with chest pains and I 'm trying to do two, three things at once here"

"I'll better go and check on this patient and you go drag Carter's sorry ass back here!"

"Ok, Curtain 4" Abby said, walking away from the admit desk. Her eyes are scanning round the ER, popping her head to look, room after room and the ambulance bay. He is nowhere to be seen. She sighed, trying to think over where he could be and she focused at the door that she took a glimpse of.

"Ah" Abby sprang with surprise, realising that there's a possibility he could be in the men's toilet. She looked around to makes sure no one see her entering the room.

* * *

Carter inserted the needle into the protruding vein on his arm; he sees a ripple of his blood that he drew out, mixing in with the clear substance, then pushes the contents into his system. His body jerked and shuddered after he shoots up his dose of Fentanyl. He can feel the effect of the drug burning in his blood vessels throughout his anatomy. Repeated the shoot up with the Steroid.

Abby shuts the door carefully without making a noise and tiptoed around the room. She noticed that all the toilets are vacant except the one at the end. She heard a moan coming from that stall and a little' ping' noise, something has hit the floor. Abby squatted on her all fours and looked under the door of the cubicle. She can see a pair of black shoes standing in there and a used syringe rolling across the floor. She mouthed to herself "Oh my god". Abby gets up and the rubber on the sole of her shoes squeaked against the shiny floor. Carter flinched at the little noise and flew open the toilet door. She tensed her shoulders to cringe and stepped back to the sinks. Abby is frightened now because she cannot predict what Carter is going to do next. Carter stepped forward; he is intimidating her with his stare.

"Hi" Abby grinned, swallowing nervously with a loud 'gulp' noise.

"You won't back off will you?" Carter snarled and grabbed her throat.

"Ergh!" She gagged.

"You better not breathe a fucking word what you saw"

Carter's adrenalin rush took over his rage and his strength managed to throw Abby by the throat into a nearby stall. Abby cracked her head on the toilet cistern when she landed. She lays there unconscious…


	28. The Deepest Cut

**Chapter 28 – The Deepest Cut**

Carter walked to the Curtain 4, he is acting normal like nothing bad has happened, after leaving Abby unconscious in the toilets. He pulled back the curtain to see his patient again.

"Right then Mr…" Carter stops dead, he saw an empty bed. He moved his head in all directions looking for the man. He approached Haleh dealing with another patient in the opposite curtain.

"Have you seen my patient?" Carter asked looking confused

"Dr Lewis took him to Trauma 1" Haleh answered pursing her lips and gives him a disapproving looks.

"What?" Carter dashed off with both hands holding the stethoscope around his neck. He is dodging round the gurneys and trolleys to get to the trauma area.

Susan is in the trauma room with the two nurses Connie and Lily, frantically trying to revive Carter's patient.

"Vitals?"

"BP's down 90 over 50. Respiration 21"

"What's his rhythm on the EGK?" Susan asked Connie who then passes a strip of paper to her. She studied the reading. "It's V-tach, we need to shock him"

"He's in fib again"

"Paddles!" Susan shouted.

Connie gave her the paddles and squeezes gel on to them. Susan rubbed them together and placed them on the man's chest"

"I've turn the volume to 250"

"Ok Lily, Clear"

The body jolted up.

"Nothing"

"What happened?" Carter crashed through the trauma room door

"Your patient was crashing, where the hell you've been Carter?" Susan shouted holding the fib paddles "300. Clear!"

The old man's body jolted up again.

"No pulse"

"I see Abby found you eventually" Susan said, looking furious and instructed Connie to turn the volume up on the crash cart. "Charge up to 360"

"Clear"

"What? I haven't seen her" Carter replied lying through his teeth, shaking his head, Susan looked at him with his eyes wondering around. She suspected that he's hiding something. Truthful people look in the eye…

"Normal sinus rhythm"

"Good work guys" Susan praised her colleagues "Get him up to Cardiology"

Susan snapped off her surgical gloves and threw them in the bin. She walked up to Carter standing at the doorway. She had an infuriated look on her face and her lips are twitching to try stopping herself bursting out in anger.

"What the hell were you thinking?" She scoffed, putting her hand against her temples. "How could you abandon a patient like that, especially one with chest pains? You could have asked someone to cover while you disappear to your so called fantasy world"

"I did ask but they refused"

"They refused? Or they were busy dealing with other patients, what was so urgent for you to clear off?"

"I don't want to discuss it"

"Perhaps we can discuss it in my office at the end of the shift"

"Whatever" Carter said, thrusting his head forward close to her face, it made her flinched and walked away.

"Hell…" She muttered to herself blinking her eyes hard, unnerved by his strange characteristics.

* * *

Abby fluttered open her eyes, she is wedged between the toilet and the wall. She groaned and winced at the throbbing pain on her head where she impacted it against the cistern. She looked around trying to regain consciousness. She noticed there is blood on her lab coat and on the floor. Abby shrieked with panic, she tried to un-wedge herself to see where the blood was coming from. She feared that she might have lost the baby. She gets up unbalanced and looked down at her groin area of her pants – no sign of blood. Abby sighed with relief, rubbing her tummy _'Baby's ok, I think?'_ That was the first time that she had felt that she wanted the baby. Abby felt a cold trickle down the side of her face.

Abby opened the door and walked to the mirrors at the wash area. She sees a deep cut over her eyebrow with blood steeping out from it and part of her hair is matted from the ooze. Abby choked back in tears and grabbed a handful of paper towels from the dispenser on the wall and compresses the cut. She heard a whistle entering through the door. Abby stepped back into the cubicle so she can seclude herself. She looked through the crack on the door, with her hand raised up compressing her head. She sees Archie Morris using the urinals and breaking out in a song. He walked to the sink area; he looked in the mirror in admiration by clicking his tongue and winking. He bends over to wash his hand in the sink and noticed there was blood drops all over the surface. Morris eyes followed the trail on the floor to the stall. He pushes the door ajar and sees a bloodied Abby trembling in the corner, crying.

* * *

"Oh great!" Susan huffed "Abby's turn to abandoned a patient… now this is becoming a joke"

"Dr Lewis, a call on line 3" Frank said.

"Oh Frank take a message, I don't want to deal with any calls at the moment"

"It's Chuck"

"Ok I'll take the call" Susan walked over to Frank, taking the phone and placed it against her ear. "Hi"

"Hi Suse, just to calling to say that Cosmo is with the nanny, will you collect him when you finish work?"

"Oh ok, are you getting called in at work?" The blonde asked.

"No… I won't be there where you get home, I've gotta go the battery on my mobile is low" 

The phone line cuts off, Susan looked at the phone looking puzzled, thinking that was a strange abrupt call. Morris come rushing in, catching his breath, distracts her.

"Will someone give me a hand here? I've found Abby in the men's room, she needs medical attention"

"Oh god!" Susan gasped, thinking the worst… the baby…

* * *

"How you do you feel now?" Susan asked, leaning over, shining her penlight into Abby's eyes

"A bit fuzzy, but I'm ok"

"That's a deep laceration you've got there Abby" Susan said, leaning over again, examining her cut on her brow "Haleh can you get me the suture tray"

Abby is laid down on the gurney and she turned her head away. Susan puts her hands on her lower abdomen, check if there were no problems there. "That's fine"

"Carter did this to you, didn't he?" Susan asked discreetly sitting down on the stool. "I know this is a hell of a shock to you, I understand if you don't want to talk"

Abby turned her head, looks at the blonde and closed her eyes gently. She doesn't say a word. They sit there in silence for a minute.

"Look I am sorry about not being supportive early, you are my friend, I care about you, I don't want you to get hurt, especially you're carrying a baby now"

"Thank you" Abby mouthed

"When is your first booking in appointment with the OB?"

"Thursday"

"Ok…" Susan said looking around, trying to keep conversation with Abby, who is the patient of a few words and asked "Hey maybe I could give you a ride home, I finish my shift soon"

"That be great"

"Maybe get a bite to eat at my place first? Chuck says he won't be home when I come in. I don't really want to cook for one"

"Yep I would like that, I don't really want to be at home alone"

"Of course Neela is on 6 till 6 shift isn't she?"

"Here's your tray Dr Lewis" Haleh said giving Susan the suture tray.

"Thanks Haleh, Oh erm…" She gets up from the stool and walks with Haleh to the doorway of the treatment room. And whispered "Can you find Carter and get him to come in my office in about half hour?"

Haleh nodded at her boss and walked away. Susan stepped back on to her stool. She fiddled with the instruments on the tray.

"Are you going to be a good patient?" Susan asked tilting her head down smiling at Abby; she picks up syringe and injected the local anaesthetic round the wounded area. Abby winced at the needle pricking her.

"Ouch! I can see why patients moan at us when we do that" Abby mumbled. "There's not a lot of flesh there"

"I will perform a technique that will reduce the scarring" Susan laughed trying to humor her friend. Abby rolled her eyes and her mouth tweaked a little smile.

"Dr Lewis" Jerry said, popping his head round the door "I'm afraid Dr Carter has left the building"

"Shh" Susan turning round mouthed and sighed. He always has a habit of dropping it in. She rubbed her forehead "Thank you Jerry"

Abby narrowed her eyes at Susan, she is just finishing touches to the suturing.

"That's done nicely," She said putting down the suture thread. "We can go home now…"


	29. Dear Abby

**Chapter 29 – Dear Abby**

**Disclaimer:** Lyrics "No Regrets" belong to Robbie Williams.

"Lets put some music on," Abby said, leaning over pressing the button on the radio in Susan's car.

"You are listening to Radio FX We have the weather report, tonight's temperate is going to be 30 degrees, we have a high risk of sleeting, so stay well wrapped up"

"Oh? It looks like I'm gonna have to get my sexy thermals out tonight," Susan laughed gripping on the steering wheel.

"The next track I am going to play is 'No Regrets' by Robbie Williams, a huge star over the other side of the Atlantic"

_Tell me a story  
Where we all change  
And we'd live our lives together  
And not estranged_

_I didn't lose my mind it was  
Mine to give away  
Couldn't stay to watch me cry  
You didn't have the time  
So I softly slip away..._

The sleeting showers started to hit the windscreen and Susan puts on her wipers. The lights turns to green, The car pulled away.

"Spoke so soon" Abby commented about the sudden weather change.

_No regrets they don't work  
No regrets they only hurt  
Sing me a love song  
Drop me a line  
Suppose it's just a point of view  
But they tell me I'm doing fine_

_I know from the outside  
We looked good for each other  
Felt things were going wrong  
When you didn't like my mother_

Abby lets out a nervous laugh, Susan looked at her with a puzzled frown.

"What?"

"Felt things were going wrong, when you didn't like my mother!" Abby sang out loud. Susan snorted in her laughter at her friend and carried on watching the road.

_I don't want to hate but that's  
All you've left me with  
A bitter aftertaste and a fantasy of  
How we all could live_

"It won't take a minute for me to get Cosmo" Susan said stopping the car and gets out. Abby sighed and looked around, feeling paranoid. She leaned over to press the lock button.

_No regrets they don't work  
No regrets they only hurt  
(We've been told you stay up late)  
I know they're still talking  
(You're far too short to carry weight)  
The demons in your head  
(Return the videos they're late)  
If I could just stop hating you  
(Goodbye)  
I'd feel sorry for us instead_

A hard rapping on the window made Abby jump out of her skin. She looked and sees Susan waving at her, pointing at the door "Let me in!" She leaned over to unlock the car door. Susan shook her head for being stuck out in the sleeting rain and she strapped Cosmo in to the car seat in the back.

"I'm sorry Suse, I guess I'm just nervous"

"It's ok Hun, it's understandable"

_Often I sit down and think of you  
For a while  
Then it passes by me and I think of  
Someone else instead  
I guess the love we once had is  
Officially dead_

Susan gets in her drivers seat, shuddering from the cold and started the engine. She paused. "I don't fancy cooking right now, shall we eat out?"

"I don't mind as long I get something to eat, I'm starved!"

"Good I need to nip home first to get some more diapers and my credit card"

"You've got your mommy's smile," Abby said leaning over her seat talking to Cosmo, they're waiting for Susan who popped in her apartment to get her things. "Aunt Abby will have a playmate for you soon…" She looked down and patted her tummy.

Abby waits anxiously as her hunger pangs takes over, she rubbed the condensation of the door window and looked through it and sees Susan locking her front door. She stepped down the stairs and walked round to her side and gets in.

"All set?" Abby asked leaning forward to look at Susan who is turning her head away as if she doesn't want to be looked at. Abby puts her hand on her friend arm and nudged "Susan? Are you ok?"

She nodded looking down. Her face is not visible because her blonde hair hung forward. Then she shook her head and thrusts a note to Abby. Susan broke down in tears leaning against the steering wheel. Abby opened the note and reads the contents.

_Dear Susan_

Just a note to say that I've gone away for a while and I feel our relationship is no longer worthwhile. I am tired of our constant arguments especially about the hours we work. We seem to be more committed to our work than our marriage. You take a good look at ourselves, we've been kidding ourselves really, to be truthful we are really only staying together because of Cosmo?

I'll be honest, I have met someone else… a woman who will be there when I come home from work

My lawyer will be in touch about my access to our son.

Thanks for nothing

Chuck

"Oh Susan, I'm sorry" Abby said looking sympathetic

"I saw it coming" Susan sniffled.

"Why didn't you tell me about it?"

"Haven't you got enough on your plate as it is?"

"You've been there for me Susan, I expect to return the favor" Abby said rubbing her hand across her friend's shoulder. "Let's go to my place, talk it over and I'll order a take out to be delivered, I'll drive"

"No Abby you can't drive, you've had a concussion, I'll manage" Susan sniffled turning on the ignition "I can't believe that Chuck has been screwing around. Eww I've could have caught anything! Bastard!"

* * *

Abby walked up the steps to her front door; Susan followed her carrying Cosmo and wiping her eyes. The brunette opened the door and noticed an envelope on the floor. She picked it up and it is addressed to 'Abby'

"Uh you've got a letter too, is it your turn to be dumped" Susan said bitterly.

"Looks like Carter's writing?" Abby said showing the envelope to her then opens it and pulled out a letter. She unfolded the paper and reads it…

_Dear Abby_

_By the time you are reading this letter, I'm probably half way across the Atlantic on my flight to Kisangani._

_I am hoping you would hear me out for my behaviour; I am in the right frame of mind writing this letter. I could not bring myself to tell you face to face, I am a coward. I'm sorry that I hurt you dearly; I would not ever dream of laying my finger on a beautiful precious person like you. You probably hate me now._

_You are absolutely right I confess, I am taking Fentanyl and as you didn't know I am also taking Anabolic Steroids too. I am having bad withdrawals at the moment. You may want to know why I am injecting myself?_

_This is my reason - I have never come to terms with losing Joshua. I was devastated that my child was stillborn and it did not help Kem leaving me too. I needed the support but I had no one to turn to… You probably thinking why didn't I go to you… I know you are great listener but I felt awkward wanted to go to you especially that I finished our relationship last year, and met Kem. I had feared that you might have gloated the fact my relationship with her had failed. Abby, now I know you are not the sort of woman who gloats about things. I learnt that from that night we went out for a drink, of course one thing lead to another. _

_The event of that night resulted you being pregnant with my child (I'm sorry what I said on Christmas day, denying its mine). It had brought back memories with Kem's pregnancy. I started to be silly by getting paranoid the fact I am frighten that you will go through the same as her, losing the baby and stupid me I have put you at risk myself! I don't know how I would cope if that happens, then again you probably thinking I am being very stupid about the whole thing. I should have had therapy but I was too proud to go and get help. Look where it had got me… I might have lost you forever because of my unacceptable behaviour._

_I will not be away too long but I will keep in touch. Hopefully going to Kisangani will be good therapy for me, sorting myself out._

_I love you Abby, you are the only person I've ever really loved._

_You look after yourself and the baby. I enclose a cheque for $20,000 with my support so you can buy the things you need for the nursery._

_Love always_

_John xx_


	30. Prenatal Care

**Chapter 30 –Prenatal Care**

_The following Thursday…_

Abby is walking along the corridors of the OB floor, sporting a colorful bruising that developed round the laceration on her brow. She is heading for her first booking in appointment with the obstetrics. She knows what to expect after working few years as a nurse in OB. She feels a bit anxious going alone, as she would have preferred to have company of a friend to go with her, like Susan Lewis, unfortunately who is running late for some reason. Deep down she would like John Carter to be there, even though he has treated her badly, Abby feels forgiveness after he confessed to her in his letter he left her before leaving the country. At the end of the day, he is the father and should be part of the child's life.

She enters the waiting room and walked to the reception area. No one is present; she presses the bell for attention. Abby turned to look around the room and sees there is half a dozen pregnant woman sitting in the waiting room, doing various thing like flicking through magazines, doing breathing exercises and rubbing their swollen tummies comparing the sizes with each other. She spotted the very cosy Sam and Luka in the corner. Abby smiled and raised her hand to wave at them. They wave back and Luka planted a kiss on Sam's cheek, she turns to him to give him a full kiss.

"Get a room" Abby muttered under her breath

"Hello can I help you?" The receptionist greeted.

"Yes Abby Lockhart, I have an appointment with OB Doctor"

"Let me look" The receptionist looked at the PC screen "Oh yes Abigail Lockhart"

"_Abigail Lockhart"_ she mouthed and rolled her eyes

"Would you like to take a seat Miss Lockhart"

"Doctor Lockhart… thank you" Abby said correcting the woman who is wearing an embarrassed smile. She walked over to Sam and Luka and sits next to them.

"Hey Abby, your first appointment?" Luka asked holding Sam's hand

"Yep, it is, I guess this is your first scan?"

They both nodded playfully, they kiss each other again and giggled. Abby forced a smile thinking that she is going to throw up and her thoughts were when she was looking at them giggling away like two teenagers…

'_Looks like they've sorted their problems out then, maybe the baby has bonded them close again, lucky them I have no-one for sure, I don't know if Carter will ever be in my life. Life's a bitch then you die oh well I am going make sure this Carter Jr is going to have the best in life, the child hood that I never had"_

"So are you going to find out what sex of the baby at your 20 weeks scan?" Luka asked.

"Erm. I've haven't really though about it, probably not I'll leave it as a surprise"

"We want to know" Sam smiled "Good way of preparing the nursery"

"Hmm I am not going to do the nursery in pink if it's a girl" Abby laughed "I hated pink ever since Carter took me to a charity dinner and fished out a horrible pink dress for me to wear, I'm going to do a neutral color"

"If it's a girl I want to called it Lilijana after my grandmother"

"No Luka I don't want our child having a foreign name"

"Sam we agreed that you pick the boys and I pick the girls name!"

Abby raised her brows at the pair, wondering if this going to be a full-blown argument. She leaned over to pick up a magazine.

"What do you think Abby?" Luka asked

"What?" Abby raised her head from looking down at the magazine

"Lilijana"

"Nice but it's not up to me" She chuckled, flipping the pages. "Perhaps you could shorten the name to Lily?"

"Lily… that's lovely! Oh thanks Abby" Sam smiled. "What you think Luka?"

"Beautiful" Luka grinned, lost for words.

"Oh I'm sorry I'm late Abby" Susan said rushing in, out of breath looking stressed out "I got held up with my appointment with my lawyers, it took longer than I thought"

"That's ok, I wouldn't be offended if you weren't up for it"

"No not problem, I don't want to let you down, at least it would keep my mind off things" Susan sat down next to Abby and is surprised at who else were present "Oh hi Luka, Sam I didn't see you both there"

"Hi" The couple waved at the same time.

"Lawyer? You having problems?" Luka asked in curiosity.

Susan grinned, shaking her head; she doesn't want to talk about it.

A nurse walked into the waiting room and called out a name. "Samantha Taggart?"

Sam and Luka both get up and nodded at Abby and Susan. "Bye"

"Saved by the bell" Susan said blowing out air in relief.

"How did you get on with your lawyer?"

"Not good I am so…" Susan replied and lowered her voice to swear, "_Fucking_ furious with Chuck, he's applying for custody of Cosmo"

"No that won't happen, if it comes to the worst it be a joint custody" Abby said reassuring her friend.

"Yeah my lawyer said that"

"Susan, I've been invited to my cousin's wedding, back at home on Valentines weekend"

"That is nice for you, to get away"

"Well I was just asking if you wanted to come along. Give me company, thought you could do with a break yourself"

"I wouldn't say no to that" Susan's face brightened up "I love to go, I definitely need a break, to get away from here and I haven't had one since… well I can't remember!"

"We'll travel, early Friday morning, ok?" Abby asked leaning over to put the magazine back on the table.

"Fly or drive?"

"Minneapolis is only 400 miles from here which probably take 6 hours by car to get there"

"Yeah why not have a girly road trip!" Susan snorted in her laugh.

"I'll book the hotel rooms later this afternoon"

"Yeah try get a double singles please, I don't want to be alone in my room in a strange place"

"Strange place? You have never been!" Abby joked at her friend.

"Abigail Lockhart?" The nurse announced at the doorway.

"Off you go Abigail!" Susan nudged her friend who is unimpressed being called by her full name.

* * *

"Abigail Lockhart? Please take a seat," the Obstetric said, looking down at the notes in front of him. Then looked up and recognised his patient "Oh Dr Lockhart, I thought the name was familiar!"

"Call me Abby" The brunette smiled and sat down.

"Oh hello Dr Lewis"

"Hi Dr Trenton" She nodded.

"Right… as you know the procedure of your first booking-in for your antenatal care" He gets up from behind the desk and walks round to sit on the front of his desk. "Can I have your urine sample if you have one?"

Abby opened her bag and pulled out a Lab envelope containing her urine sample and her bloods.

"I've got my bloods here too to save you doing it" Abby gave him the samples.

"Thank you" He said looking surprised. He takes it from her and gives it to the nurse who is standing on the other side of the desk. "Janet, can you get me the result for these samples please"

Dr Trenton got up and walked back to sit behind his desk, he picked up a pen and opened the file.

"Can you tell me when was your late date of LMP (Last Menstrual Period)? How long your average cycle and how many days does it last?"

"LMP was November 14th, the average cycle is 25 days and lasts for 7 days"

The Doctor picks up a EDD (Estimated Delivery Date disc to check what date the baby is due "You are nearly 7 weeks pregnant and your baby's EDD is August 21st"

"Oh a Leo baby!" Abby chirped

"You have a Mulitgravida pregnancy history, on my records you had a termination 9 years ago, is that correct?"

"Erm… yes" She muttered under her breath. She closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip.

"Maybe I ask the reason for it?"

"My marriage was a sham, it was a bad time"

"Abby I have a few questions regarding you and your family medical history"

Abby turned her head to look at Susan, forcing a grin at her and mouthed_ "Interesting"_

"Do you or any one in the family have a heart problems, had a stroke, Cancer or suffer from asthma?"

"No"

"What about the baby's father?"

Abby leaned forward and puffed out her cheeks at the question, how much does she know about Carter?

"I know that his grandmother died last year from heart problems, but that was old age" She leaned back into the chair and crosses her legs "and of course his brother died of leukaemia when he was a boy"

"Is there any other conditions your family suffers from?"

Abby nodded at Dr Trenton and sat in silence staring at him. He looked back at her peering over his glasses waiting for her to answer. A minute passed and Susan leaned over to tap on her shoulder "Abby" She jerked when she is woken from her dreaded thoughts.

"Oh yes... erm… my mother and younger brother suffers from Bi-polar Disorder" Abby answered clearing her throat and folded her arms.

"Ok" Dr Trenton responded and writes in the notes "If you don't suffer from it yourself, the chances are low for your baby to get the condition"

Abby turned to Susan, raising her brows. She nodded in return.

"Right Abby how are you feeling in general? Have you had morning sickness?"

"Yes I feel generally well and I have had a few sickness, but it's easing off now"

"Ok I will have to do a pelvic exam on you now, would you like to hop on to the couch" Trenton asked pointing his arm in that direction.

"Is this a new procedure?" Abby asked with a frown "I don't remember this when I was a OB nurse, only happens if you have problems"

"Well medical rules change all the time, we have to check for prolapsed uterus or pelvis dysfunction, where the pelvis separates"

"Of course I should know that, I've dealt with them in the ER"

"Dr Lewis is here, she can chaperone for me"

Abby gets up and walked to the couch and Trenton drew the curtains across.

"Let me know when you're ready?"

A minute passed a voice calls from behind the curtains. "I'm ready"

Trenton drew back the curtain and stepped forward snapping on his surgical gloves. Abby is laid across the couch, without her pants on but a sheet draped across her pelvic area.

"Lube please" He asked putting his hand out at Susan who frowned back at him. _'Who does he think he is? I'm not his nurse, I am the Chief of Emergency Medicine!' _She slams the tube in hand. He squeezes the lube on two of his fingers.

"Please can you relax, I am going insert my fingers" Trenton inserted them in her and with the other hand; he examines her lower abdomen by pressing gently. Abby looked up at the ceiling, pursing her lips. "That's fine, no problems there"

"Thank you" Abby said sitting up and Trenton again drew the curtain.

A knock on the door, a nurse popped her head round the door. "Have the results here"

Abby drew back the curtain, finishing buttoning her pants. She sat herself down in front of the desk.

"The results come back fine, no protein or sugars in your urine. Your bloods results should come back in a few days stating your blood group and haemoglobin level, one last thing I need to take your blood pressure" He leaned over to strap the belt on Abby's arm and switched the machine on to read the pressure. "120 over 70, very good"

"Is there any question you would like to ask?"

Abby shook her head; she has the expertise knowledge in that medical field.

"We would like to book you in for a scan at 12 weeks"

Abby and Susan leave the Obstetrics office; they noticed Sam and Luka in the corridor entering the elevator. They are fixated at their scan picture of their baby. They rush to catch that ride, by the time they get there the door have already closed.

"I don't mind taking the stairs" Abby said catching her breath "Oh Susan… thanks for coming"

"No worries"

"And… would you be my birth partner?"

"Of I course I love to…but what about Carter?"

"Can I guarantee that he will be there? Anyway if he is present, I still want you to deliver our baby"

They both make their way down stairs.


	31. For Better or For Worst?

**Chapter 31 - For Better or For Worse?**

"Hi there" Abby walked in and threw her keys on the table.

"Hi" Neela replied lazing on the couch under the quilts covers watching daytime TV.

Abby pulled her bag over her head and hung it on the coats stand. Shed her coat off and puts it on a hook above the bag. She walked to the kitchen area.

"How did you get on at the prenatal care?" Neela asked with her hand wrapped round a mug.

"Fine, the baby's due on 21st August" Abby said picking up a glass from the cupboard and walked to the sink to turn on the cold-water tap and filled the glass. She took a long drink.

"My…! Pregnancy sure does make you thirsty" She muttered to herself.

"Have you had any cravings yet?"

"Nope, not yet but I've gone off coffee big time!" Abby said leaning back against the sink with her hand holding the glass, resting it against her chest. Then her eyes searched at Neela "Don't tell me you haven't got up yet?"

"I'm on nights tonight so I am not rushing about" Neela said, pressing the remote control button to change channels.

"Looks like that I may need to buy a new couch after when you find someplace else!" Abby laughs and pauses as something has dawned on her. "I must make that call to book the hotel room" Abby reached for the phone on the wall, she grasped the air, noticed that the cordless phone wasn't there. "Neela have you seen the phone?"

"Yes I was using it earlier but I have forgotten where I have put it?" Neela got up to shake the quilt and ruffled the cushions. "So you are still going to Minnesota alone?"

"No, Susan is coming with me" Abby replied bending down looking under the table.

"Oh? Well suppose she could do with a break, she looks really stressed lately," Neela said on her all fours looking underneath the couch. _"Still no sign of the phone"_ She muttered to herself tucking her jet-black hair behind her ears when she stood up straight.

"Yes she is… back in a sec" Abby walked into the bathroom and shuts the door behind her. She opened it again quickly. She is standing there with the cordless phone in her hand, pulling her face with disgust "I hope you haven't had a 'dump' whilst you were using the phone?"

Neela laughed with a guilty conscience.

"Eww Neela!" Abby winced tossing the phone at her and walked back into the bathroom again.

"_Good Afternoon Plaza Hotel, How I may help?"_

"Hello I would like to book a room with 2 singles on 13 and 14 February please?"

"Ok, would you like to hold while I check the availability" 

Abby puffed out her cheeks waiting for the response. She can hear the receptionist taping away on the PC.

"Yes there is rooms available for both nights" 

"Oh thank you, I would like to go ahead booking the room please and erm… I see there is discount for guests attending the wedding there"

"_Would you like to confirm whose wedding it is please, it's just to stop people conning their way of getting cheap rate!"_ The receptionist laughed out and Abby mimics her.

"It's Rachel Wyczenski and Thomas Krane's Wedding"

"_You get your discount!"_ She bursts out with excitement. Abby arched one of her brows and forcing out a laugh.

"I would like to pay by card please" Abby asked, pulling the plastic from her purse.

There is a knock on the door and Neela gets up to answer it. An unexpected person has turned up. It's Jake. Abby is trying to read her numbers of the credit card. The brunette spun on her heels to look at the direction of the door and sees Jake, she started to stutter with distraction from his surprise turn up.

"Oh sorry I'll read it out again" She said trying concentrate reading out the numbers on the card.

"Thank you, we will send you a confirmation letter by post, thank you for your custom is there anything else?"

"No but thank you, bye" Abby puts the phone down on the table and turned to her guest clasping her hands together. "Jake, what brings you here?"

"Hi I just wanted to drop by to say goodbye before I head off to San Francisco"

"Bye" She replied subtly waving at him.

Jake's blue eyes widen and bursts out with laughter at Abby's response.

"Well what can I say?" She shrugged "All the best"

"Thank you" Jake smiled looking at the brunette in admiration "I erm see you are having a baby, you look beautiful when you're glowing"

Abby nodded and looked down to avoid eye contact.

"So it's 50/50 chance that the baby could be mine?"

Abby looked up at him and shook her head with disagreement "No… no Jake we were being careful"

"Were we?"

Abby almost replied but stopped with her mouth open "What do you mean, were we?"

"I think I'll take that shower" Neela said getting up from the couch and rushed to the bathroom. They both watch her leave.

"Well I recall couple of occasions that we didn't use protection"

"What! When?"

"One example, remember that night we went to Bobby's party?"

"Yes it was a good 'Craic'" Abby replied imitating Jakes Irish roots by saying in Gaelic 'a good time' and he lets out cute chuckle. "But I was knackered, sober, and you were quite drunk"

"Well…it was in the middle of the night"

Abby frowned trying to recall the event. "And?"

"I woke up a bit sober and got a bit frisky, I asked you if I could you know" He said tilting his head to one side a few times like a rocking mode trying to imply what he is saying. "You were half asleep, you muttered yes"

"Huh! I can't believe you took advantage of me while I was asleep!"

"I did asked and you said yes! Otherwise I wouldn't have bothered rolling on top of you"

"And you didn't use protection then?"

"No, I realised that after a few minutes so I presume that you were on the pill, so I carried on"

"What? I can't fucking believe that I'm hearing this! Why do you guys always presume?" Abby said rubbing her head thinking can things get worst "I came off it months ago because I wasn't in a relationship then I met you and I didn't think we would last long so I didn't bother"

Abby's chest started to heave, she doesn't know whether she wants to burst out in anger or burst into tears. She walked away with her hand on her forehead and paced round the couch and nearly stumbled over Neela's quilt, half sprawled out on the floor. Abby tuts to herself with her foot tangled in the material. She headed to the window and pushes it open for some air. She felt suffocated with her persistent problems with overwhelming consequences attached to them. With her eyes closed, she take in a deep breath with her head hanging out overlooking the street, her lungs tingled when she fills it with the freshness of Chicago's winter air. Abby's bottom lip started to quiver; she is trying to withhold herself from crying.

"Oh god, how am I going to tell Carter? He is right; about what he said and didn't mean it 'I have doubts' too right I have doubts myself! I can't believe what mess I am in, I go at all lengths not get pregnant in my adulthood, then it happens it's like having men queuing round the block claiming it's theirs, even Luka could come along and says it his, even though we broke up 5 years ago. Oh stop it Abby! I'm being over the top with my silly thoughts, my stupid hormones!"

"Well the damage is done" Abby said looking down with her eyes following a car passing by.

"Here is my new contact details" Jake walks behind Abby and gave her a piece of paper. "I hope we can keep in touch, I am happy to do a DNA to see if the baby is mine, I want to know so I can help with the support and be part of it's life ok?"

"Thank you" Abby moved her head back inside the apartment and looked down at the paper "I know this is a silly question, are hoping it is yours or not?"

"Yes I hope so…" Jake grinned; he walked back to the door and looked down where his hand is resting on the door handle. "I miss you, I'm sorry I didn't workout between us, maybe we kinda rushed into things"

"I've…erm… kind of… missed you" Abby stuttered with a brave little smile knowing she can melt with those eyes of his. "I am sorry too, I was confused"

"I've got to go, I have a plane to catch, and I'm running late as it is" Jake leaned over to plant a kiss on her lips and whispered, "You take care of yourself"

Abby watched the door close in front of her. She stands staring in silence with sadness all over her face. How does she manage to keep her sanity together?


	32. Pick Up and Drop Off

**Chapter 32 – Pick up and Drop off**

_Over one month later…_

_February 13th_

Abby pulled up in front of Susan's house. She pushed her sunglasses up to rest it on top of her head and then blared the horn to let her know she's waiting. Abby purposely chose a black Cherokee Jeep the latest model to hire for the weekend, because she used to have one, an earlier model since then she has always been attached to them. Abby sold her Cherokee when she first arrived in Chicago, living in the city, it was pointless keeping if you are not going to use the vehicle especially that work is only a ride away on the EL. Abby sat with both arms stretched out to grip her hands on the steering wheel. She then fiddled with the adjuster near the side of her left leg. She levered it to position the seat correctly for comfort and a good view out of the front windscreen. Abby leaned over the passenger side to look out of the window and see her friend stood at the door with Cosmo under her arm, resting on her hip, waving and signalling 2 minutes with her fingers, the brunette nodded back.

Susan walked down the steps with her son in one hand and booster seat in the other hand. Abby notice 2 sets of baggage left on the doorstep.

"I'll get those for you while you strap Cosmo in" Abby assisting her friend, Susan puts her hand in her coat pocket to pull out a set of keys and gives them to her.

"Can you lock the door for me please?"

"Sure" Abby walked up the steps and picked up the luggage and walked down again. She opened the door to put them in the trunk. Susan finished strapping her son in and stepped in the passenger side. Abby got in, putting her seatbelt on and turned the ignition on to start the engine.

"Nice choice" Susan nodded commenting on the vehicle, she leaned over to poke and prod at the gadgets on the dashboard. A drinks holder popped out. "Are you sure you don't mind dropping Cosmo at Chuck's place?"

"Of course I don't mind" Abby replied, driving the car away.

"He is being awkward, I asked him if he'll pick him up but says the girlfriend using the car" Susan said pulling down the sun visor and looks at herself in the mirror, she puckered her lips. "Lately I've been doing the running round like dropping him off, he hasn't been around at my place since he collected his stuff, why won't he come round?"

"Oh yeah I've heard that one before, she may have control over him and won't unleash him"

"Really?" The blonde leaned her head forward looking at the brunette "I must be naïve then, telling me that Nicole might put her foot down"

"Nicole? That's her name?" Abby chuckled.

"What?" Susan shook her head wondering why Abby finds it so amusing "I found out her name last week"

"Oh just that when I was dating Luka, he has his eyes clapped on a Nicole and he finished up dating her after we broke up" Abby pursed her lip trying not to smile hoping that it's not the same Nicole, Chuck is dating.

"That was a year before I came back to Chicago, so I wouldn't know who she is"

"Which road does Chuck live at?"

"1345 Richmond Street West, that's his girlfriend place" Susan answered letting out a sigh.

"Have you met her?"

"No, I hope she is there so I can see what she looks like"

"Yeah well don't get your claws out, I am not in a position to restrain people!"

"Abby you are not much of a side kick!" Susan snorted at her friend.

Cosmo sitting in the back in his car seat with a juice beaker, he mimics his mother's and shouted, "Piggy snorts mommy snorts" and keeps repeating the words.

Abby bursts out with laughter and Susan's face turned pink with embarrassment.

"Aw Susie you're blushing!" Abby said giving her friend a gentle punch on her arm, teasing, "Cosmo is doing well with his words for a 2 year old"

"Yes he is" The blonde nodded clearing her throat and grinned looking over her shoulder to take a glimpse of her son "I want him to be intelligent like his mommy"

Abby saw the street sign 'Richmond Street West', she looked in the rear-view mirror and signalled to turn left. She drove the Jeep down the street, leaning forward looking at house numbers and Susan is doing the same, scanning the numbers.

"1345… There" Susan said, pointing her finger at the direction of the house. Abby pulled the Jeep up in front of the house and puts the handbrake on. Susan hopped out of the car and walked round and meets Abby getting out of her side.

"Do you need a hand?" She asked opening the back door for Susan.

"I think I'm ok, perhaps you can carry his bag, while I'll sort the car seat out" Susan answered leaning in the back, undoing the seat belt from the toddler booster seat

"Hi Abby" Chuck greeted the brunette, looking unshaven and tired out coming out of the house.

"Oh hi Chuck" She replied walking to the back vehicle, opening the door to lifts the bag up from the trunk and gave it to him. "Cosmo's staying over clothes"

"Thanks and congratulations!"

Abby paused for a second think what he is on about; she puts her hand on her tummy "Oh yes thank you"

A long blonde curly hair woman steps out of the house and slipped her hand into Chuck's hand and grasped tightly. Susan lifts Cosmo out of the car and paused to look at his girlfriend. Abby raised her brows in surprise how young she looked. Susan walked over to Chuck carrying Cosmo who is resting on her hips. She gave him the cold silent look. He reached his arms out to receive his son and Susan handed him over.

"How's my boy?" Chuck asked, giving him a hug.

"Hi I'm Nicole, you must be Susan" said the younger blonde stepping forward, putting her hand out to shake. The older blonde looked down at her hand and looked at her in the eye, being non-responsive. Susan looked at her estranged husband who is wearing a nervous smile.

"You take care of Cosmo" Susan asked politely, leaning over to kiss her son "I'll be back Sunday evening ok?"

Chuck nodded and he handed Cosmo over to Nicole and asked her "Can you give us a minute?"

Nicole narrowed her eyes at her lover and stormed off in to the house with the toddler. Abby and Susan both raised their brows and look at each other thinking about the maturity level of Chuck's lover.

"Do you have to be so rude?" Chuck snapped

"What? What the hell are you on about?" Susan pulls a puzzled face "I haven't said a word to her!"

"Exactly, you was being ignorant when she offered to shake hands"

"Oh sorry you want me to be best buddy with the kid" Susan said raising both hands up and pointed up her index fingers and bended them with sarcasm "who stole my husband? Go to hell Chuck!"

* * *

With her head facing the view of the road, Abby moved her eyes to the side to look at her friend, who is leaning her head against the door window with her arms folded looking bemused. Susan has been sat in that position for the past 15 minutes, since they left Cosmo with Chuck. Abby lifted her hand off the steering wheel and reached over to tap on Susan's lap, The blonde flinched, the tap had startled her waking her up from her angry thoughts about why her marriage has failed and where did it go wrong? 

"I hope you are not going to have a miserable face for the entire journey?" Said the brunette pursing her lips watching the road.

"I'm sorry" Susan replied sitting up straight, tucking the strand of blonde hair behind her ear. "I am not being fair on you"

Abby smiled reaching over to the dashboard to press the button to turn on the radio.

"What do you think of Nicole?" Susan asked

"I don't know her" Abby replied shrugging her shoulders.

"No what I mean is do you think she's attractive?"

"Yes I think she's pretty, she looks quite young"

Susan groaned sinking in to her seat "I thought the same, she pretty alright, she won the competition there, I'm the frumpy ugly one"

"Susan don't put yourself down like that"

"Well it's true, she's prettier than me and she probably got more energy then I have, I'm some thirty-something who is worn out physically and mentally"

"Susan you are a working mother" Abby said interrupting her friend "What does Nicole do?"

"She doesn't do anything and I heard that she's dropped out of college, to devote herself to him"

"You're kidding me," Abby shook her head in disbelief "I thought he would encourage her not to give up education?"

"Search me"

"You know what Chuck's problem is?" Abby said swinging her head to Susan "He cannot take the fact that you are a lot smarter than him and more successful"

Susan pulled her bottom lip out and nodded, agreeing with what Abby had said, she is right.

"And I don't want to hear you putting yourself down like that again? Just remember that you are a beautiful, caring human being, ok?" Abby scolded Susan with a little smile. "You are much better looking than Nicole ok?"

"Ok" Susan looked down feeling embarrassed the fact that she is like Abby, doesn't take compliments very well.

They are riding along the highway heading out to the open space and they see a big sign on the side of the road, it reads…

_You are leaving Chicago, please come back soon!_


	33. Road Trip Part I

**Chapter 33 – Road Trip Part I**

Disclaimer: Lyrics "If it Makes You Happy" – Sheryl Crow, "The Way I Am" – Eminem & "Here with Me"- Dido

The sun shone through the clear February morning sky, the air is fresh. The Jeep is pacing along the deserted road in the middle of nowhere. Abby laughed out loud, she just had wild thought. Susan looked at her, wondering what she was laughing about. The brunette presses the electric window buttons on her armrest, on the door panel. She wound down all the windows to let the outside breeze circulate inside the vehicle. Both females hair are blowing and flapping all over the place. Susan started to shudder and puffed out her cheeks to fight the coolness. Abby leaned over to place a compilation CD into the player on the dash and turns the volume up full.

The blonde jumped out of her seat when heavy guitar riffs started blaring out of the speakers. Abby started to nod her head, with her lips pouted and banging her hand on the steering with the rhythm.

_Well, o.k. I made this up  
I promised you I'd never give up _

If it makes you happy  
It can't be that bad  
If it makes you happy  
Then why the hell are you so sad

Abby leaned over again to turn the volume down to low and presses the door button to wind up all the windows.

_Well, o.k. I still get stoned  
I'm not the kind of girl you'd take home_

"Thank god for that" Susan praised rubbing her temples. "You crazy girl!"

"You don't like that one?" Abby laughed out loud.

"Yes I like the record, it's just the volume is a bit on the loud side"

_If it makes you happy  
It can't be that bad  
If it makes you happy  
Then why the hell are you so sad_

"Oh Susie since when you've turned into a goody goody in your old age?"

"I haven't!" Susan shakes her head defensively

"Whatever Saint Matron…" Abby said looking down at the dashboard to check the speed she is driving at and how many miles she has driven.

Susan scoffed at her friend's name-calling and sits back sulking, with her arms folded.

"Ok this is the plan, I'll drive the first 150 miles, then we stop for a pee break and you do the next 150" said Abby stating the routine of the driving matters.

"Ok" Susan winced rubbing her ears; they are ringing from the blaring music.

"Then I'll do the last 100 miles"

"Ok… Can we include breakfast with the pee break?" Susan asked

"Huh? You haven't eaten?"

"No, I didn't have time juggling about getting myself and Cosmo ready"

"Well can you wait…" Abby leaned forward to look at the odometer on the dashboard to see how many miles she had already done, she had reset it to zero when they left Chuck's place. "120 miles?"

"No" Susan answered in a low tone.

"That's no problem, there's a drive thru about 30 miles down this road" Then Abby chuckled at herself and confessed, "I have a craving…"

"Really? What?" Susan replied in amusement; she folded her arms again and cocked her head, as she is intrigued to hear what Abby's craving is.

"Hash Browns" Abby said then she laughed out loud "with chocolate sauce!"

"Eww Abby, that's gross!" Susan laughed pulling her face in disgust. "Mind you I have no room to talk, mine was banana dipped in teriyaki sauce"

"Bluurrrgh!" Abby pulled out her tongue, pretending to throw up.

They both shake their heads chuckling to each other then they sat in silence listening to the music.

_And I am, whatever you say I am  
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?  
In the paper, the news everyday I am  
Radio won't even play my jam  
Cause I am, whatever you say I am_

"I don't like this one" Susan grumbled, opinionating at the rap music and leaned over to skip on to the next track. She nodded gently "This one's nice"

"Susan I was listening to that!" Abby protested.

"Tough" She answered assertively.

_I didn't hear you leave  
I wonder how am I still here  
And I don't want to move a thing  
It might change my memory _

Oh I am what I am  
I'll do what I want  
But I can't hide  
I won't go  
I won't sleep  
I can't breathe  
Until you're resting here with me

"Where exactly are we staying in Minneapolis?" Susan asked, trying to make conversation to break the silence between them even though the music is playing.

_I won't leave  
I can't hide  
I cannot be  
Until you're resting here with me_

"Near St Paul's, where I grew up"

"Ok" She nodded "And maybe we should hit the bars tonight"

"Yeah good idea, I'll take you to my hang out bars" Abby suggested "That's if they are still there?"

_I don't want to call my friends  
They might wake me from this dream  
And I can't leave this bed  
Risk forgetting all that's been_

Abby's cell phone shrilled the ring tone. She looked down to get hold of it from the phone holder on the dash. She flipped the phone open and looked at the screen to see who is calling '_Neela' _

"Hello?" Abby answered, she winced trying to hear what Neela is saying, resting the phone between her ear and shoulder to reach the CD player button, to turn the volume down "Can you slow down, I can't understand a word you are saying, are you ok?"

"No… I am not… ok," Neela said, stuttering in a distraught broken voice. 

"What's wrong?" Abby asked being concerned about the tone of her voice.

"I'm sorry to ring you on your trip, I needed someone to talk to" 

"No worries, what's bothering you?"

Susan leaned forward to wave to get her attention. Abby double looked at the distraction her friend is giving her. Susan mouths, "Who's that?"

"Neela…"Abby mouthed, "She's upset"

"Pratt have just given me a right rollicking for something that he made in error" Neela broke down in tears "and he's giving me the blame for his actions!" 

The blonde tapped on Abby's shoulder again and asked. "Why she upset? Is she at work?"

Abby flinched as she is getting agitated trying to listen to a distraught Neela with Susan interrupting tapping on her shoulder and driving.

"Will you stop that?" She snaps at Susan who is again tapping away, jumps in surprise at her friend's abrupt reaction. "Neela, you cannot let him do that to you, you need to report it"

Susan sat back frowning at the brunette trying to work out the conversation, she can guess it's work related. She started to feel frustrated and curious about that she is suspecting that an incident has happened and she's outside of the loop which she needs to be aware what's going on, her role as the Chief of ER.

"I don't know why I'm giving you advice where I have our boss sitting to here eavesdropping!" Abby said, putting on a forced laugh "Do you want to speak to Susan?"

"Ok, I'm sure she will understand and believe me" 

"Yes I can assure you, she will" Abby thrusts her phone at Susan "Neela"

Susan takes the phone and answered. She sat back in her seat listening to Neela telling her side of the story about Pratt's error. Abby listened to their conversation, while watching the road. Abby took a few glances at Susan.

"Hey don't worry, I'll sort this out when I get back on Monday" Susan said, reassuring her colleague "Hey don't let him upset you, ok? You take care bye"

Susan flipped the phone shut and puts it back in the phone holder on the dash.

"Uhhhhhhhhhh" Susan lets out a long groan, sinking back into her seat and muttered. "Why can't I have five frigging minutes peace without ER phoning up with some sort of crisis they can't deal with?"

"Because" Abby smiled wryly "You handle them brilliantly"

Susan rolled her eyes, and sticks her tongue out, blows a raspberry… Leaned over to her friend and asked "Are we nearly there yet?"

They both laugh…


	34. Road Trip Part II

**Chapter 34 – Road Trip Part II**

"So have you decided what you are going to call the baby?" Susan asked trying to make conversation to break the silence they have endured for past half an hour.

"Yes and no" Abby replied concentrating on her driving.

"Yes and no?" Susan said, shaking her head looking puzzled.

"Well no one knows about this except Neela, because she was there"

"What's that?"

"The baby might not be Carter's"

Susan gasped and looked at her with the slightest trace of a smile. "Well it wouldn't surprise me, there's 50/50 chance between Jake and Carter anyway"

"Yeah he came round to my place to say goodbye before he left for 'Cisco" Abby said, pointing at the McDonalds 'drive thru' sign to let her hungry friend know that food is nearby. She puts the indicator on to turn the vehicle into the outlet. "It will have to be McDonalds"

"That's fine, anything"

"Anyway Jake heard that I was expecting and suddenly announced that it could be his because he recalled a couple of occasions that he didn't use protection"

"What? Surely you knew he was wearing a condom?"

"Not if you're half asleep and him rolling over on top of me in the middle of night then realized he forgot to put one on and then presumed that I was on the pill, he carried on"

"Hopefully he did it to you with your consent"

"Yes half asleep, I'm sure you've done things half asleep"

"Yes" Susan snorted in her laughter. "I do things wide awake!"

Abby drove the Jeep up to the ordering window. A standing in the booth is a teenage employee who greeted them with her wide smile. "Morning ma'am what can I get you?"

"Suse?" Abby said swinging her head and raised her brows to look at Susan.

"I'll have a sausage egg McMuffin meal with orange juice and a coffee please"

"Make that two" Abby signalling two fingers at the girl.

The assistant nodded and busily taps away on the till. She picked up a condiment bag and stuffed it with napkins and straws and handed it over to Abby.

"So if you decided on a name, why you need to change it if it's Jake's?" Susan asked carrying on with the discussion.

"Cos if it's a boy I was going to give it a middle name - Jonathan after Carter" Abby announced taking the condiment bag and puts it on the dash.

"Is that everything ma'am?" The girl asked interrupting their conversation.

"Oh yes can I have some chocolate sauce please?" Abby requested wryly.

Susan's response is to raise her hand to her mouth to keep from laughing at Abby's request for the sauce for her hash browns craving.

"I'm sure we can get some for you, that be six dollars and 59 cents"

Abby looked down at her purse to get her money out and handed the cash over to the girl.

"Thank you, your order will be ready at the next window, have a nice day"

Abby drove to the next window where a teenage boy who is waiting, handed over their brunch. Abby dumped the food and drinks on Susan's lap and drives off to leave the premises to go back on the road.

"I bet you are hoping its Carter's?" Susan asked, looking into the bag and puts her hand in to pull out a McMuffin.

Abby nodded, "Yep" She replied truthfully "I still love him even though he had his problems at Christmas, well I must love him if I wanted to help him"

"And what does Jake think about the baby?" Susan handing over the McMuffin to Abby who kindly takes it with her free hand whilst the other hand is gripping on to the steering wheel.

"Hoping that the baby's his" Abby replied taking a bite of her brunch "Mmm this is good… hopefully, the only way to find out who is the father when I have the 12 week dating scan"

* * *

230 miles into the journey and Susan is now doing the driving. She has already driven 80 miles since taking over after stopping at the service for toilet break. Abby is sat in the passenger side and keeps drifting in and out of her sleep. Her tiredness has caught up from driving 150 miles. She kept waking up every time her head flopped forward or rolled to one side. She lets out a groan in frustration and sat up straight. She rubbed the back of the neck to ease the stiffness from resting her head in an awkward position whilst sleeping. Susan grinned at her friend who keeps grumbling.

"Hmm… Why is my life so complicated?" Abby muttered.

"Erm…" Susan murmured, gripping both hands on the steering wheel, blinking hard and she bites her bottom lip, recollecting her memories of her up and downs. "Gosh I thought my life was complicated at one point like ten years ago when I had to watch out for Chloe who turned up out of the blue, she then kept pinching my stuff to feed her drink/drug habit, going missing for days and got pregnant then abandons baby Susie by dumping her on me. Then years later after I came back to the County, Susie goes missing in New York, I had to go over and help find her"

"You can come up for air," Abby laughed, interrupting her friend waffling on.

"What else?" Susan took a deep breath, she didn't hear Abby interrupting. "Oh yes I met Chuck, did a silly thing by going to Las Vegas and married each other at the spur of the moment. We haven't known each other long, didn't workout, got divorced then got back together, fell pregnant, had Cosmo and now I'm on my own because he ran off with a girl who is barely out of her teens because I am a career woman not a woman who gets the dinner ready on the table when he comes home"

Abby chuckled at Susan's motor mouthing about her life story. "So what's the future holds for you Susan?"

"The future?" She answered with her eyes concentrating on the road "I think I need to move on"

"Move on?"

Susan nodded frantically "Yes, a new start for me and Cosmo, now I'm not with Chuck nor I ever want him back"

"What are you planning?"

"Well I did once said I loved my job and County is my home" Susan took a deep breath and pursed her lips. "Well I think it's time"

"What? Are you suggesting that you are leaving?" Abby asked leaning forward and narrowed her eyes.

"Leaving Chicago, yes I'm thinking of going back to Arizona"

"Nooooo! Why?"

"What have I got here apart from friends?" Susan shrugged taking a quick glace at Abby "My parents move to Arizona and my sister lives in New York, well what does that leave me? I think it would be good to let my parents watch my son grow up considering they have missed out on Susie"

Abby sunk back in to her seat and chewed her bottom lip looking out of her passenger door window.

"And you are the first person to know this…"

The disappointment has hit Abby. She sat in her seat in silence, she doesn't know what to say, she is starting to feel bitter because Carter has already left and now, hearing Susan announcing that she is planning to leave too. Abby tried to stop her mind wondering off thinking about being left behind by her friends. She leaned forward and punched the button turn on the radio to let the music drown out the thoughts whizzing round her head. The shock of her best friend leaving has already spoilt her trip even though it is only the beginning…


	35. Plaza Hotel

**Chapter 35 – Plaza Hotel**

After a 6-hour long journey from Chicago, Abby and Susan arrive at the Plaza, a hotel rising 15 stories above the pulse of the city of Minneapolis. Abby drove the Jeep down into the parking lot, situated underneath the hotel and pulled up in front of the barrier. She rummaged through her bag to get out her hotel reservation documents and removed a parking card that is attached to it. She pressed the button on the door to wind down the window and reached out of the door to insert the card into the machine. Abby drove into the parking lot after the barrier went up and automatically finds a parking spot and swerved into the free space.

They walked into the lobby of the hotel with their luggage in their hands. Their eyes marvelled at the impressive interior design with retro furniture in the lounge section. Far left is the entrance to the hotel bar and restaurant which is opened to the public not just for the hotel users. The place was bustling with clients on business and vacation. They both walked to the main reception desk.

"Hello, how I may help?" The receptionist greeted, She stood up with a welcoming wide smile, She has auburn colored hair, which is neatly tied up in a bun and smartly dressed in the official hotel company suit. You could mistake her for an airline stewardess.

"Hello I like to check in for my reservation please, the name is Lockhart"

The receptionist sat down in her chair and tapped Abby's name on the PC. She stood up again and walked to the back of the reception area. She removed a letter and key card from the pigeonhole number 45. The receptionist signalled the bellhop over to assist taking the luggage up.

"Please can you both sign here please, for security and fire regulations" She asked sliding the book onto the counter surface towards Abby and Susan.

Abby picked up the pen from the holder and scribbled her signature. Susan scribbled her name too.

The bellhop who is in his early twenties, with ruffled up hairstyle greeted the two women. They both winced as he reeked of body odour. He takes their luggage and signalled to lead the way to the elevator.

"You're kidding me," Abby whispered, pinching her nose dreading having to take a ride with a stinker.

"Enjoy the aroma in the confide space of the elevator" Susan chuckled nudging her friend.

They entered the elevator and he pressed the button for the fourth floor. The doors slowly closed and while they hold their breath they watched at the numbers lit up above the door as they passed each floor. They were praying for the quick ride to the designated floor.

The elevator dinged and the door slid open. Abby and Susan both coughed trying not to gag as they arrived on to the fourth floor by stepping out to the long corridor. They followed the young man to their room, only a few doors away. He slid the key card into the door and opened it to enter the room.

The room is large and spacious with cream and lilac colored emulsion on the walls with two copy prints of Monet's artwork hanging opposite directions. Sliding doors with long curtain draped down the sides, leading out to the balcony. There is a double bed on the left side of the room with high quality cream cotton duvets and crisp linens. On the right, a doorway to the en-suite bathroom with gleaming gold taps and a free standing shower. Another door leads to a walk-in closet. In the corner of the room stood a large plasma screen television with in-room entertainment system providing music, video and hotel information on demand.

"Here you go" The young man smiled lowering the luggage down to the floor and puts his hand in his trouser pocket. "Let me show you around"

Abby and Susan glanced at each other realising that the room has only one bed.

"Erm I think you've got the wrong room" Abby pointed out.

"No ma'am this is room 45"

"But there must be some mistake, I booked a room with two doubles"

Susan shook her head and couldn't help grinning at the mix up.

"Well you will just have to go down to the reception and sort it out from there"

"Damn right I will!" Abby said, feeling disgruntled, she puts her hand in her pocket and handed over a bill to tip the bellhop. "Thanks anyway, I think we can find our way round"

"Nice room" Susan commented with her arms folded, having a nosey round. She grimaced as watches the bellboy leave the room scratching his head frantically. Susan squatted down to see what's behind the cupboard door underneath the television. It was a mini bar, full of miniature bottles of bourbon, gin, vodka and cans of sodas.

"Don't make your self too comfortable I need to get this rooming matter sorted, I won't be long," Abby said letting out a sigh feeling tired from the journey and cranky about Susan's sudden decision about leaving Chicago for good.

Susan glanced at Abby taking a letter out of her bag and jumped when the brunette slammed the door behind her.

* * *

Abby stormed out of the elevator and quickly walked across the lobby to get to the reception desk. She can see that there are about half dozen people standing, waiting to be served and pushes her way through the queue. She ignored their disgruntled murmurings.

"Excuse me!" Abby waving her arms and placed her hands flat on the counter leaning forward and abruptly queried, "We've been given the wrong room, I asked for a room with two doubles!"

"I'll just check on the system for you" The receptionist cleared her throat feeling threatened by Abby's assertiveness. She gently tapped away on the PC and scanned her eyes over the information on the screen. "I'm sorry it says double room on the screen"

Abby scoffed "Well one of your colleague has made a mistake inputting the information on the PC because I have a letter here that confirms I have booked a room with two doubles" She said, waving her letter under the woman's nose.

"Oh I'm sorry"

"So can you get the room the I request for please?"

"I'm afraid that we are fully booked up this weekend due to a wedding here"

Abby rolled her eyes and huffed "I gather that would happen, but it's not good enough, your colleague didn't do their job properly"

"You will have to make do with that room or go someplace else"

"Well I have no choice, it's been a long day after travelling for 6 hours and I don't want to mess about by finding another place to stay"

"We are happy to refund the difference"

"Good and I expect to be compensated for the let down too!"

"I will have to look into that, will you excuse me for a minute I need to speak to my manager"

Abby watched the receptionist leave her seat and disappeared through door situated behind the reception. She impatiently drummed her fingers on the counter and forced a smile at another receptionist, who is looking back at her, irritated by the tapping noise. She looked at the customers who are shaking their heads at her for pushing in the queue. Abby thought to herself that she wouldn't ever normally do this, barging through like she did, she is a patient person then again she chuckled to herself because she blamed it on her pregnancy hormones! _'Oh well'_

"The manager is happy to give you a voucher for free meal for two in our restaurant with our compliments" The receptionist kindly announced the good news to keep her customer happy.

"Oh… thank you…" Abby said, in a high tone with the surprise.

* * *

Abby walked back into the room looking annoyed and threw the letter onto the bed by the flick of her wrist where Susan is sitting, punching the buttons on the remote control, flicking through channels.

"Is everything ok?" Susan asked tucking a loose strand of her hair behind her ear.

"Sorry Suse, we'll have to make do with this room, they're fully booked up and good thing is we got a free meal ticket out of it!" Abby answered waving the voucher.

"Oh well, I don't have a problem sharing the bed with you… and great free food!" Susan chirped and pressed the 'off' button on the remote.

"Susan"

"Yes?" The blonde replied in a soft tone, swinging her head round to look at Abby.

"Since we are sharing this bed…" The brunette said, with one hand on her waist and the other with her finger pointing at Susan's direction.

"Yes?"

"Don't you ever… DARE touch me or you're dead!"

"Likewise…" Susan laughed at her friend's playful threat and rose up on to her feet to place the remote control next to the television. She rubbed her hands together "So are we gonna get something to eat?"

Abby nodded "Sure" picking up her bag and followed Susan to the door. She muttered, "I wonder if any members of family have arrived yet?" 


	36. Old Flame

**Chapter 36 – Old Flame**

"Abby Wyczenski, you are looking beautiful than ever!" A voice said from behind.

Abby turned round to look who it is and her jaw dropped to the floor. She is in the middle of eating her free meal with Susan in the hotel restaurant.

"Oh my god Howie!" Abby screamed as she rose up to his eye level then leaned forward to put her arms round his neck to give him a hug. "How are you doing? You look great!"

"I'm fine thank you," Howie answered. They both stare at in each in silence for a moment. Susan took a sip of her drink watching them, waiting for them to say something. She nudged Abby's arm.

"Oh yes, sorry" Abby shook her head and introduced them to each other "This my friend Susan Lewis, Susan this is Howie Thomas"

"Hi" They both greeted each other in unison, shaking hands.

"I have a friend waiting over there, maybe when you finished your meal, you both can join us?"

Abby answered "Sure, if that's ok with you Susan?"

Susan nodded.

"Ok see you in a bit" Howie left them to meet his friend who is standing at the bar.

"So I have finally met the guy whose name sounds like a plumber who gave you the longest 16 seconds of your life!" Susan laughed. "He is very cute"

"Hmm he has improved with age," Abby said, sitting back down in her seat watching him walk away. "His friend is not bad either"

"Where? Where?" Susan jerked her head up trying to see where Abby was looking. "Ooh he's nice, I'll have him and you stick with Howie"

"Jeez Susan…" Abby sneered, taking a swallow "You sound worst than a teenager!"

Susan chuckled taking one last mouthful of her meal. While chewing it slowly, she studied Abby's face.

"What?" Abby asked, stabbing a piece of chicken with her fork and looked up.

"Oh you can talk now…"

Abby seemed confused "What do you mean?"

"You have spent the entire meal not saying a word to me until your old flame appeared"

"I don't like to talk while I'm eating" Abby said picking at her food.

"Right… don't talk crap Lockhart" Susan snapped and grabbed hold of the napkin to wipe her mouth. "Sometimes you talk that much you complain that your food's gone cold"

"I'm tired ok?" She said, defensively.

"Well I'm tired too, I know what your problem is… you're upset… upset about my sudden announcement"

"Yes…" Abby answered honestly.

Susan raised her brows, She knew herself that she was right, she knows Abby too well. With her moods and expressions, she can almost read her like a book.

"What did you want me to say about that?" Abby asked and puts on a sarcastically whiny "Oh Dr Lewis I am so pleased for you!"

"Well that would be nice" Susan said forcing a grin

"Phffttt!"

She shook her head "I hope you are not going to spoil my weekend with your silly unpredictable moods?"

"Oh Susie that's too bad cos you've already spoilt mine"

Susan scoffed at her friend in disbelief. She shot up from her seat and leaned forward to grab her glass of wine and knocked back the contents in one go. Susan angrily threw the napkin on the table and leaves. Abby cringed at her friend's reaction and watched her head off to the ladies room.

* * *

Susan stormed in to the ladies room seething and headed to the wash area. She rested both hands down flat on the counter and stared at herself in the mirror. She sighed to give herself chance to calm down for a minute. Susan left the room and headed straight to the bar. Susan noticed that Abby was no longer sat at the table. Her eyes raced round the room and spotted her with the Howie guy. His friend is no longer to seen. Abby quickly glanced back at her and carried on chatting.

Seated on a bar stool, Susan asked "A tequila please"

The bar tender placed a shot glass in front of her along with a lime and some salt. Abby turns to watch Susan suck on the lime, licks the salt and knocked back the tequila. She groaned and shuddered from the bitter potent taste. Susan tapped the glass on to the bar "Another one please and a margarita to follow!"

"Is your friend ok?" Howie asked, trying to distract Abby from watching her friend sulking.

"Oh yes she's ok…" She forcefully grinned and came up with an excuse "She didn't want intrude… you know me and you catching up with things"

"Yeah it's not fun listening to two people going on things they don't know about"

"No it's not," She agreed.

"You better watch your friend so she doesn't have a hangover at the wedding tomorrow" He chuckled.

"So… where is your friend?" She chirped

"Oh he gone to meet a family member, he'll be back soon"

Abby nodded. "So Howie, What do you do for a living?" She asked, sipping her iced tea.

"I work for myself, I am a plumber"

Susan overheard their conversation and bursts out in a hysterical laughter. Abby rolled her eyes and quickly turned round. She glared at her friend, pursing her lips trying not to laugh with her.

Abby mouthed, with a trace of smile. "I'm gonna kill you!"

Susan laughed again and knocked back another tequila.

"What? Is she ok?" Howie frowned looking over Abby's shoulder.

"Oh yes, just ignore her she can be weird sometimes when she has a drink" Abby said amused at Susan's raucous laugh.

"She is weird…" He agreed.

"No she's not really, you don't know her, she's lovely, and she just had a stressful few months"

"Haven't we all?" Howie laughed taking a swig from his bottle of beer "So did you decide to be a doctor in the end then?"

"Eventually"

"Oh took that long?"

"I started out as a nurse, because my ex husband Richard, blew away my tuition money, remember Richard?"

"Yes Richard Lockhart, God I can't believe you finished up with him?"

"Neither can I" Abby answered subtly "I divorced him 7 years ago"

"How come you are not drinking?" Howie asked, flirting with Abby by brushing his hand against hers and made an excuse to move closer to her is to put his empty bottle on the bar where she is leaning her back on it. Abby raised her brows when she noticed that his face is very close to hers.

"Because I'm pregnant," Abby answered with a smile.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realise that you were with someone" He apologized, he stepped back letting out a nervous laugh "So who's the lucky guy?"

"There is no guy" She frowned looking down, tracing her fingertip round the rim of the glass. To keep her complicated affairs, simple. She felt that the easiest answer was... "He left the country"

"Oh I'm sorry," Howie said sympathetically looking down fiddling with his fingers, "I have 3 kids, they live with my ex wife"

"Whoa 3 kids…" Abby raised her brows.

Susan gasped when she spotted a familiar face entering the restaurant. She waved at Howie for attention. He pointed to himself. Susan shook her head and pointed at Abby.

"Your friend is waving, she wants you" Howie said

Abby took a quick glace at her friend, turning back, she said "Oh just ignore her she's being silly"

Howie shrugged his shoulders at Susan. She drew in a deep breath and got down from the barstool. She nearly stumbled when her leg gave way. It has surprised Susan as she underestimated the alcohol level from the Mexican firewater.

"Don't say I didn't warn you…" Susan said calmly, walking past, with a serious look on her face.

"What the hell is she on about?" Abby frowned looking confused and watched Susan walk out of the bar to the lobby.

"Abby!"

Abby's body froze when she recognized the voice. She slowly turned round with her shoulders all tensed up, gritting her teeth. The voice belonged to her mother Maggie Wyczenski…


	37. Wrestling with Madness

**Chapter 37 – Wrestling with Madness**

"Hi, I erm… didn't expect you to arrive till tomorrow?" Abby asked, rubbing her forehead.

"Bill and decided to fly in today" Maggie replied with a wide grin.

"Bill? Who's Bill?" Abby shook her head.

"Look at you, you're still pretty but you've put some weight on" Maggie commented, leaning over inspecting her daughter's figure. "You've put weight on sweetie!"

She is unaware that her daughter is carrying her grandchild. Abby quickly placed her hands to cover her pregnancy bump.

"You doctors eat at irregular hours, you should know better, I have a better figure than you!"

Abby rolled her eyes in disbelief upon hearing this. She shook her head at Howie and when Maggie wasn't looking she mouthed, "She doesn't know"

Howie's mouth formed into a silent "Aah"

"Oh hello Howard, I didn't see you there you certainly grown up! You should have stuck with my daughter all these years, she shouldn't have married that loser Richard, he has ruined my daughters life" Maggie said and asked "where is Richard these days? If I see him again I will kick the stupid fuck's sorry ass!"

"Hey watch your language!" Abby shouted

"Don't you tell me to watch my fucking language young lady" Maggie snapped.

Abby flinched at her mother's reaction.

"Aren't you going to say hello to me Howard?"

"Erm hello Mrs Wyczenski good to see you again, sorry I couldn't get a word in!" Howie chuckled nervously; his eyes are moving round fast, starting to feel uncomfortable.

"I won't be Mrs Wyczenski for long now" Maggie sighed gleefully looking at her ring on her finger.

"What do you mean?" Abby frowned with her eyes fixated on her mother's diamond cut.

"Bill and I are getting married"

"For the second time… who the hell is Bill?"

"My fiancé" She answered, "Oh sweetie, didn't I tell you? No, no, no, no" Maggie shook her head and paused for a second "No I didn't because you're not interested in my sorry life, you're just selfish carrying on with your own life like jumping into bed with different guys"

Abby scoffed in disbelief "I can't believe I'm hearing this!"

"Like that Euro doc and that lovely rich boy, what's his name?" Maggie put her hand on her temple and closes her eyes tight trying to think "John, John, John… JOHN!"

"Look Abby I've got to go now, I'll catch you at the wedding" Howie awkwardly interrupted their conversation.

Abby sighed, feeling embarrassed and she thought to herself _'Gee thanks, leave me with my mad mother' _

"Aren't you going to introduce me to Bill?" Abby asked, she is intrigued.

"Of course!"

Maggie got hold of Abby's hand and leads the way to her table. Sat there was a distinguished looking gentleman who is busily scanning through the menu.

"Bill…"

He looked up and quickly gets up from his seat.

"This is my daughter Abigail"

"Oh hello, Maggie told me all about you, you're her favourite daughter!" He leaned to shake Abby's hand.

She frowned with confusion _I'm the only daughter?_

"My-my what a fine looking daughter you have Maggie" He commented with a grin "I can see where she gets her good looks from… you!"

"Oh Bill!" Maggie giggled and fluttered her eyes. She leaned over to give him a wet sloppy kiss.

Abby shuddered watching them two, getting all lovely dovely. She wanted to throw up. Maggie and Bill both sat down. Abby noticed her mother starting to look very shocked. Horror is written all over her face.

"This fork is dirty, it's dirty, it's dirty" Maggie rose up and waved the object at the waiter "Excuse me this fork is dirty, I must have a clean one"

"Ok ma'am" The waiter nodded and tried to take the fork out from her hand. She firmly gripped it as he struggled to take it off her. Maggie lets go causing him to go to lose his balance. She tapped on his shoulder as he turns away.

"A clean one, clean one" She pointed her finger up. Maggie seated herself again and looked up at her daughter. "Why don't you join us dear?"

"Erm no, I've already eaten thanks" Abby hesitated "I've got a friend waiting, I have to go…"

"Oh you brought John?"

"No, my friend Susan"

"Susan? Let me think" Maggie goes into deep thought trying to remember who her friend was "Oh the sweet blonde one"

"Yes"

The waiter comes back with another fork and placed it on the table. Maggie snatches it and studies the silverware.

"No I can't have this, cant have this, it's dirty, it's dirty, and it's fucking dirty!" She protested and got up to threaten the waiter with the fork. Thrusting the object at him, the young man is starting to freak out at her behaviour.

"Nooooo" Abby groaned, burying her head into her hands. She tried to restrain her mother and wrestled with her to get the 'weapon' out of her hand. "Just give him the damn fork!"

Maggie threw herself onto the floor and tried to pull Abby down too.

"No no don't…" Abby begged, she feared that she would put the baby at risk if she were knocked to the floor. Unfortunately it was too late. Abby is on the floor. She lifted herself to kneel over her mother trying to get the fork off her with one hand and the other, protecting her stomach by blocking her kicking tantrums. With her luck Abby grabbed the fork off her mother and raised her arm up to give it to the waiter. He quickly takes it from her and ran off. Abby got back on her feet again when Maggie surrendered. She gave Bill a disapproving look wondering why he hasn't helped.

"It's dirty Bill!" Maggie shouted, feeling alarmed.

"Yes Maggie it's dirty, " He agreed.

"Bye" Abby tried to walk away but Maggie held her back by pulling her by the arm.

"Hey sweetie, I'm better, better these days, Bill keeps me better"

Abby raised her brows at looks at Bill to see if she telling the truth, He shrugged and smiled.

"You will never get better…" Abby said honestly in a calm matter. "But you can have it under control if you keep take the meds"

"I do!" Bill jumped up like a kid, nodding frantically "I do, I-I-I keep taking mine"

Abby blinked hard and her mouth is slightly open, she couldn't believe what she is hearing, is her mother's partner bipolar too?

"Hey Maggie"

"Yes dear"

"You think everyone got it in for us? They've made the forks dirty?" Bill asked, worriedly.

Abby gasped and puts her hand in front of her mouth and slowly stepped away from their table.

"Catch you both tomorrow" She said and quickly dashed out of the restaurant before Maggie has the chance to catch up and get the last word in.

* * *

Abby walked in the room and quickly closed the door behind and locks it. She bends over trying to catch her breath. She realised she just did a silly thing by rushing up the stairs like mad especially after doing a wrestling match with her mother. She felt the strain on her stomach. Her head was throbbing with tension. She noticed the light from the half opened bathroom door is penetrating through the darkness of the room. She walked towards to the bathroom and pushes the door ajar. The bathroom was very steamy and mirror was thickly covered in condensation.

"Susan?" Abby called out, in a soft tone, popping her head round the door to see if her friend is present "Susan?"

Susan sat in the giant bathtub with foam up to her neck. She is resting her head against a waterproof pillow with her eyes closed. She opened one eye and quickly looked at Abby. Susan ducked her head underwater and stays below for a few seconds. Abby looked on by and starting to get worried about the length of time she is staying under. She stepped closer and startled herself when Susan shot out from under the water. Her hair and face is caked with foam. She tried to rub away the soapy froth away from her eyes, as they are stinging. Susan tried to reach over for the towel and struggled to find one at arms reach with her vision blurred. Abby quickly stepped in to grab the towel and gave it to her.

"Thanks" Susan asked rubbing her eyes "Did I scare you?"

"Hmmm" Abby nodded, "Look I'm really sorry, I'm sorry that I overreacted"

"Apology accepted" Susan said, not looking at her friend and dipped lower where the foam is at her neck level again.

Abby looked on at Susan waiting for her to apologize but she doesn't do it. The brunette narrowed her eyes and starting to feel really annoyed so she stormed out of the bathroom. Susan amused herself when she opened her eye to see Abby go off in a huff.

Abby walked to her luggage and unzipped the side to pull out a bottle of Tylenol and takes a couple. Abby walked to the bedside to switch on the bedside lamp and picked up the telephone. She looked at the hotel number list and punched the number 9.

"Hello room service" 

"Hello this is room 45, I would like to order two hot chocolates and a large bottle of water please, ASAP"

"Would you like Marshmallows, chocolate flakes and whipped cream on them?" 

"Ooh yes please" Abby moaned with excitement, hearing what she ordered has sounded heavenly.

Susan walked out of the bathroom wearing the hotel's complimentary bathrobe with a towel wrapped round her head. She saw Abby replacing the telephone on to the receiver.

"Abby I'm sorry" She apologized, sitting herself next to Abby. "You didn't give me chance to say it when you left the bathroom earlier."

"No worries" Abby smiled "Are we still friends?"

"Friends? Always" Susan answered who is still slightly drunk.

"Good because I've ordered hot chocolate with all the works"

"Friends forever!" She laughed.

"I'm going to bed soon, I'm whacked" Abby yawned.

"Yes it's been a very long day," Susan said walking over to her luggage to get her pyjamas out. "So did you talk to your mother?"

Abby nodded "God I dread tomorrow"

"Ignore her"

"I can't. Everyone expects me to clear the mess up and sort her out"

Abby lips are quivering and she started to cry. Susan sat back down next her, she pulled Abby in to a hug to comfort her. Abby tells Susan the full story about happened in the restaurant earlier.


	38. Cousin Rachel's Wedding Day

**Chapter 38 – Cousin Rachel's Wedding Day**

_February 14th Valentine's Day_

"Oh god!" Susan moaned when she fluttered her eyes open. She is suffering from a slight hangover. She thought to herself. _I didn't have that much to drink…?_

She realised that she is snuggled up to Abby with her arm round her. In shock of her position she quickly moved away from her. Susan grimaced as she rubbed her head when she positioned to sit up.

"Suse" Abby groaned with her eye still closed "My tummy hurts"

"What?" Susan got up. She kneeled on to the bed and leaned over Abby. "Your tummy hurts? In what way? The baby, tummy bug or abdo strain?"

"I don't know Susan" Abby replied, "It feels kind of different"

"Well I'm not surprised that you feel this way after that incident with your mother"

Abby got out of bed and walked to the bathroom, holding her stomach. Susan gritted her teeth thinking the worst, hoping that her friend isn't having a threatened miscarriage or having complications.

"Do you want me to check you over?" Susan asked, watching her friend come out of the bathroom.

"Please" Abby nodded and lies back down onto the bed.

"You didn't have any bleeding when you went to the loo?" She asked

"You would have known by now if I did"

"I'm sorry, I'm in that patient-doctor mode, just habit" Susan smirked with embarrassment.

Susan rubbed her hands together to warm them up and placed them on Abby's stomach when she lifted up her t-shirt. She carefully examined the lower abdomen area.

"Does it hurt there?" Susan asked, frowning. Her firm prodding made Abby winced "Thought so…it feels tender and lumpy"

"So?" Abby rounded her lips.

Susan chuckled at the diagnosis before she has chance to tell her what's wrong. "You wouldn't believe it, you have a hernia!"

"A hernia?" Abby jerked her head up "How did I manage to strain myself that much? Surely my mom didn't cause it"

"Could be anything, you've could have had it a while and yesterday's incident could have aggravated it"

"It has just occurred to me it yesterday was Friday 13th!" Abby slapped her forehead. Both laughed at the coincidence about the superstitious day.

"I'll refer you when we get back to work, so you can get booked in for surgery after you've had the baby"

Abby commented "That'll be the end the year when I have that done"

Susan sucked in a breath and nodded in reply.

"You be gone by then…"

Susan nodded again getting up to walk into the bathroom. She is trying to avoid the subject from any confliction with her friend.

"Susan! Don't walk away" Abby shouted.

The blonde paused on the spot, dropped her shoulders and turned back to sit next to Abby.

"I want to talk"

"What is there to talk about?"

"About… if you are still going to be there to deliver the baby?"

"Of course I will still be your birth partner" Susan reassured her friend by patting her back. "I will book the time off around your estimated delivery date"

"I'm scared doing this alone, I don't know if Carter will ever come back?"

Susan shook her head "I thought you said it was 50/50 between Carter and Jake?"

"I just know its Carter… I just know"

"Well I hope so myself, He'll make a great father"

"That's if he comes back"

"Abby, he will, he wouldn't miss it for the world being part of that child's life"

"That's if it's his"

"We'll worry about that later, when we come to it" Susan smiled "Hey you are welcome to visit me with the baby, spend sometime away from Chicago"

"Yeah I'd like that" Abby's face brightened and looked at her watch "Ooh! We better get ready to go to the wedding"

* * *

The wedding processional is playing on the Church organ as Rachel makes the journey down the aisle, escorted arm in arm by her father. Her meringue looking wedding dress is in a traditional white color. Half dozen little bridesmaids wearing lemon colored fairy-like dresses follow Rachel. They are trying to keep up with her pace with their little wedding march, which is out of sequence.

"Aww aren't they cute!" Susan laughed.

"Her dress is horrible" Abby commented, in a whispering tone "I don't do dresses"

Susan smiled wryly "What did you wear when you married Richard? Shorts and T-shirts?"

"Erm… a wedding dress…" Abby replied hypocritically.

They are both sat a few rows back from Maggie. Abby chose the seats because she wanted to avoid sitting near her mother.

Rachel met Thomas at the front and they both stand before the Reverend.

"Today is the day we celebrate the love of Thomas and Rachel," The Reverend announced, giving the introduction to the marriage.

After his speech about love and god, they sang a few hymns and the Reverend started to read out the vows. Thomas repeats after him.

"I, Thomas, take you, Rachel Jane, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish till death us do part, according to God's holy law; and this is my solemn vow"

Rachel repeated the vows to Thomas.

Footsteps is heard entering the church, Susan is one of the number of people who turned their head to see who it is. The footsteps got closer to them and the sole of the shoes squeaked when it stopped behind them. A firm tapping on the shoulder startled Abby.

"Have I missed much?"

Abby gasped with her eyes widen. She recognized the voice and turned her head round. It was her brother Eric arriving late as usual. He was still tapping on her shoulder until Abby swiped his hand away with annoyance.

"Where's Mom? Is mom here? Where is she?" Eric asked.

"Shush!" Abby scolded at him.

"Am I late? I've been watching non-stop cable TV at the hotel since Tuesday Abs…"

Susan's jaw dropped and sniggered after she could not believe that Eric has been glued to the television for 4 days straight. Abby nudged her friend giving her a disapproving look.

"Hey Abs have you got Cable TV yet? You ought to have cable TV," Eric asked resting his head on Abby's shoulder, reeking of alcohol.

"For god sake Eric will you shut up!" Abby shouted in her whisper and grimaced wafting her hand to get rid of his smelly intoxicated breath. "We are in a middle of a wedding here!"

Eric sat back in his seat and put his legs up on the bench, in an unmannered way. He pulled out a pocket TV from his jacket and twiddled the knob trying to get a reception. The crackling noise distracted the nearby sitters and Susan nudged Abby and signalled her eyes at Eric.

"Will you put that away!" Abby asked when she turned to her brother.

"Hey Abs I can't get cable on this damn thing"

Abby gritted her teeth and clenched her fists in frustration. "I wish I haven't bothered coming now"

"But first I am required to ask anyone present who knows a reason why these persons may not lawfully marry, to declare it now" The Reverend asked.

Abby sank further into her seat, dreading the thought of mother might jump up and cause a scene by putting the world to rights about relationships. But no, Maggie stays put, she is stroking Bill's hand smiling like a Cheshire cat. Abby blows out a sigh of relief.

Eric stood up and jumped over the bench to the aisle and stumbled to the Bride and Groom. Everyone in the church is cursing and shaking their heads in disbelief.

"Shit!" Abby covered her eyes with her right hand and sank back in to her seat again and hid herself by snuggling up to Susan.

Before Eric could get to greet his cousin and her groom, he clumsily knocked the candle stand. Dozens of lit candles rolled along the rug, on the aisle, Eric who is laughing out loud, went after them stamping his feet to put the flames out. There were a few gasps and the Reverend started to look upset seeing that rug is now singed.

"Don't cry Rach, I know wedding days are emotional" Eric said, continuing to stamp, even though the flames are now long gone.

Rachel is merely upset at his interruption on her most important day of her life. Thomas is seething as he sees him shaking his hand with the Reverend.

"Hey I need a piss, do you know where the bathroom is? I need a piss? Pee?" Eric asked vulgarly grabbing his crotch trying to mimic the noise of urinating. "You know pssssssssssss" The church is drowned out with gasps. Abby felt so embarrassed that she wanted the ground to swallow her up and Susan is nearly in tears from the amusement.

Rachel's father yelled "Eric will you sit down!"

"Eric sweetie, do as Uncle Bob says" Maggie called from her seat. "Do as Uncle Bob says, did I mention that you do as Uncle Bob says?"

"Hi Mom, did I tell you about this new cable TV?" Eric said, walking back down the aisle heading to the doors to leave the church. He then walked back down the aisle to have another stamping session to make sure the flames are out. Abby sat up straight feeling relieved when he finally left the building. Susan tried to give her a sympathetic look.

"I thought my sister Chloe was BAD!" The blonde snorted in her whisper, wiping her watery eyes. "I shouldn't laugh really…"

The ring bearer stepped forward in front of the couple reading for the exchange of the rings. The Reverend started the blessing of the rings for the bride and groom to follow.

The groom placed the ring on the bride's fourth finger of her left hand. He holds it in place and then says: "I give you this ring as a sign of our marriage. With my body I honour you, all that I am I give to you, and all that I have I share with you, within the love of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit"

Rachel placed the ring on Thomas and says her part. When she finished her blessing and Reverend asks everyone to join in the prayer.

_Now you will feel no rain for each of you will be shelter to the other _

_Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other. _

_May your life together be good and long upon the earth and may all that is beautiful and true abide in you forever _

The vicar pronounces the couple husband and wife, and says that they are married in the eyes of the church. The bride and groom are then invited to kiss. Everyone gave a round of applause. The bride and groom move to one side with the best man and bride's father to sign the marriage certificate. While they do that the congregation sing a hymn. Rachel and Thomas are accompanied by the recessional music when they exit from the church. Everyone stood outside of the church throwing confetti over the bride and groom. Before they head off to the reception, they have a photograph session. Gathering all the family members together for the shoot even Abby was pushed in to be in some of the pictures!

Eric is nowhere to be seen…


	39. Facing Up

**Chapter 39 – Facing Up**

Abby and Susan are back at the hotel, in the function room, where they joined the bride and groom along with all the invited for the reception.

"I can't bring myself to tell Maggie," Abby said worriedly, hesitating on telling her mother that she has a grandchild on the way.

"Maggie? Have you ever called her mom? You're like my sister, she always called mom, Cookie" Susan muttered, walking round with her, scanning for their names on the cards that are placed on the table. "Abby she will know sooner or later"

"Yes I might make things worst if I leave it longer" Abby said, she shuddered as she thought that she is hoping they are not going to be sitting near her mother or Eric.

"She might change for good realizing that she need to be responsible for her grandchild" Susan said, "My father changed when little Susie came along 10 years ago, he was the laziest person ever"

Abby raised her brows feeling optimistic about whether her mother would change her ways.

"Here" Susan pointed as she found their names.

Abby carried on scanning making sure that Maggie and Eric's name are nowhere near them otherwise she would plan on moving the cards elsewhere. She said, "Thank god were with the normal part of the family!"

"Well Abby haven't you got something to say to me?" Maggie asked, coming up from behind.

"What you mean?" Abby turned round and shook her head in confusion.

"I am not stupid sweetie" Maggie winked

"Well just babble out what you think?" Abby snapped.

"Come on sweetie" Maggie's hand moved towards Abby and placed it flat on her stomach. "Are you too frightened to tell me?"

Abby stepped back and her jaw dropped to the floor. She knows that her mum isn't stupid, even with her condition, she is highly intelligent woman and doesn't miss anything, and Abby is the stupid one to underestimate her mother again. She took a long hard swallow and nodded, biting her bottom lip.

"John's?" She asked dryly.

"Yes" Abby giving that quick answer to her mother, she doesn't want to complicate things having to explain that she is unsure whether he is 100 the father. She doesn't have the energy to go down that road.

"Oh I'm pleased" Maggie grinned, "Sweetie you have made me happiest woman in the world!"

"I thought I made you the happiest!" Bill said aggressively, interrupting their conversation.

"Bill go and sit down, I'm talking to my daughter".

Bill snapped, "No woman tells me what to do!" With anger he swung his arm and hit Maggie across the face with the back of his hand and knocked her to the floor. Abby gasped in shock watching on. He spat out loudly "Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch!"

"I think it's best that you leave" Abby asked darkly, squatted down beside her mother. She stared at him then squirmed when he raised his fist at her.

"Just go!" Susan shot up from her seat to protect her pregnant friend. "Don't even think about hitting her"

Two men appeared and restrained Bill. They wrestled and escorted him out of the room.

"Thanks, I didn't know you were that brave!" Abby said, watching her mother's lover disappear through the door.

"I'm not, but the last thing I want you spending the rest of this weekend in hospital."

Abby and Susan both help Maggie get up back on her feet.

"Are you ok Mrs Wyczenski?" Susan asked

From nowhere an almighty slap hit Susan across the face. From the blow, she fell back and hit her head against the floor. The angry strike was from Bill who they didn't see come rushing back in the function room.

"No woman tells me what to do!" He shouted. The hotel securities come rushing to take him away. They can still hear him shouting and cursing out in the hotel lobby.

"Susan?" Abby asked, worriedly rubbing her friends cheek who is rolling her eyes trying to bring herself round. She puts her finger on Susan's wrist to check her pulse. Everyone in the function gathered round them like an audience

"Is she ok?" Maggie asked.

"She's slightly concussed"

"Bill does this all the time sweetie"

"What?" Abby frowned in disbelief

"Yes sweetie, he hits me all the time"

"Do we need to call a paramedic?" The hotel manager interrupted, pushing his way through the crowd.

"No it's ok, she will come round in minute," She answered

"I think we should"

"No it's ok, I am a Doctor"

"Oh, ok, is there anything you need Doctor?"

"I could do with some ice please, wrapped in a cloth?" She asked and carried on the discussion with her mother "Bill hits you all time?"

"Yes dear" Maggie chirped.

"I don't believe this!" Abby scoffed. "I can't have my mother marring an abuser!"

"Oh" Susan groaned

"You ok?"

"Think so"

"How many fingers have got up?" Abby asked raising her hand up.

"Four fingers and one thumb" She winced.

"Good girl"

"Are you ok sweet Susie?" Maggie asked

"Yes thanks" She replied focusing back at her.

"Are you sure?"

"Just a bump, ok" Susan nodded. She rose herself up unsteadily trying to get back on her feet with the help from Abby. The manager comes back with the 'Ice pack'. Susan took it from him and placed it on her head.

"I'm going to find Eric"

"He'll find his way here"

"I need to get some air," Maggie said, walking away towards the door.

"We still need to talk"

"Later, I'll leave you girls to it"

"Girls? Huh" Susan grumbled

"Well she still sees me as her little girl" Abby shrugged "I'm sorry Susan that you got hurt"

"Not your fault, I've shouldn't have stepped in but I only wanted to protect you"

"Thank you" Abby said, softly

"I can't remember the last time when I had a good slap?" Susan said amusedly, rubbing her head and wiggled her jaw as she sat down in her seat "Probably about 10 years ago when a guy was coked out of his mind who ran the red light and killed a little girl and I had to tell his mother about him and she wouldn't believe that her son was drugged up or did drugs"

"I've had my fair share of slaps in a lifetime!" Abby laughed.

They spent the rest of the reception with Abby reuniting with her other family members and catching up with things and events since last Abby left St Paul's… In the evening they flirted with the men and danced the night away… Abby caught up with Howie and said their goodbyes. They never did see Eric again; they suspected that he might have gone back to his hotel and endure the whole weekend watching television. Maggie and Abby never had their talk in the end, she left early had she said she couldn't cope with the loud music and wanted make amendments with Bill. Abby disapproves her mother for doing this but then again she is stupid enough to do what she wants in life... They left Minneapolis early Sunday morning for their journey back home to Chicago…


	40. Susan's Farewell Party

**Chapter 40 – Susan's Farewell Party**

Disclaimer: Lyrics "New York, New York" belong to Frank Sinatra

_Three months later…_

_Abby is 6 months pregnant… She has her 12 and 21 week scans. From her 12 week dating scan she has worked out who the baby's father is… it's Carter's! Abby is confused because she hasn't heard from him since he left. She surprised that he hasn't phoned, texted or written a letter to her. He has only contacted Kerry Weaver and Donald Anspaugh about the construction of his outpatient project "The Joshua Carter Outpatient Centre". Abby is bitterly hurt the fact he hasn't had the decency to ask Kerry Weaver how she was. Kerry has mentioned Abby's well being to him but he seem to cut the conversation short…. Abby is trying to stay strong, thanks to Susan Lewis's support who has been by her side since his departure and again Abby is sad because Susan makes her farewell to the ER staff to start her new life going to New York to be near her family… Susan originally considered going back to Phoenix, Arizona but she opt for the better position at a top New York hospital…_

It is an emotional day for Susan Lewis as it is her last day at County General. She is standing in the chief of ER's office trying to clear up the remaining of her desk.

"All done?" Abby asked, popping her head round the door.

"Nearly" Susan muttered and sighed looking at her watch "1 hour and 43 minutes to go and I'm out of here"

"Not only if something major arises"

"Abby don't say that!" Susan gasped at her friend hoping that she didn't speak too soon "I've got to hand my house keys over at 4 pm, I'm hoping the removal men are done by then"

Abby pitifully smiled at Susan, watching her filling her box with files, her medical journal publishing's, pictures, certificates and little personal things.

"Hey I've heard who's filling in your position" Abby chirped.

"I already know…" Susan nodded, picking up her curved double-framed picture of her son Cosmo and her niece Susie. She quickly glanced at them.

"You kept that quiet"

"Abby since when you've known me as a gossiper?" Susan answered flicking her blonde hair back looking at her sincerely.

"True" Abby nodded with agreement.

"It was up to Luka to announce his new position, ok?" Susan lifted the box. Walked round the desk and lowered it next to the door. She walked back behind the desk.

"I came in to say that Kerry Weaver wanted to have a word with you and hand over your office keys"

"Ok, I'll come up to her office shortly"

"Actually she's in the lounge," Abby said, sitting down on the edge of the desk. "She's just having some coffee and hoping you would join her for one"

Susan sucked in a breath and nodded "Ok, I'll be there in a minute"

* * *

Susan walked along the corridor with Abby. She frowned at she noticed the lounge was a little dark then again the blinds were nearly closed. Susan opened the door to walk in the lounge and the lights came on, music blaring out and everybody jumped at her to shout "Surprise!" Susan flinched back at the sudden unexpected surprise. 

_Start spreading the news, I'm leaving today  
I want to be a part of it - New York, New York  
These vagabond shoes, are longing to stray  
Right through the very heart of it - New York, New York_

"Oh god!" Susan bent herself over burying her face in her hands and laughed "Jeez, you guys caught me off guard!"

Everyone laughed at her reaction. She kept blushing and saying thank you. The room was packed out with staff, taking their moment to say their farewell. They decided to have the farewell party on the morning, as it wouldn't clash with Susan's schedule with the estate agent. Susan laughed some of the crazy staff wearing "Statue of Liberty" hats and she laughed at the music too, Jerry chose the Frank Sinatra number "New York, New York". The party food also had a New York theme – breakfast of bagels and pretzels. And they had the usual… muffins, pancakes with syrup, bacon butties, doughnuts, orange juice, and coffee all spread out on the table.

_I want to wake up in a city, that doesn't sleep  
And find I'm king of the hill - top of the heap _

These little town blues, are melting away  
I'm gonna make a brand new start of it - in old New York  
If I can make it there, I'll make it anywhere  
It's up to you - New York, New York

Jerry suddenly turned the music off.

"Thanks Jerry" Kerry Weaver hobbled up to Susan. "Susan, we are wondering if you have anything to say"

Susan looked at the grinning red head and coughed as she is trying to think of a speech.

"Erm…" She puffed out her cheeks and quickly took a sip of her drink. She is trying to distract herself from bursting in to tears in front of everyone.

"Bye!" She waved and laughed. "No I'm only kidding… erm. I like to thank everyone I have worked with and you've all been good friends… oh god I'm not good at speeches… Well take of care yourselves and I'll be in touch… Actually I'll be back soon to deliver that bump of Abby's..."

Everyone turned to look at Abby. Abby's eyes widen, as she's being looked at and smiled at them all.

Susan gave a sad smile "I will miss you guys…"

"I think we should do a toast for Susan" Luka nodded.

Everyone raised their drinks in the air and said "Susan"

"Thank you"

"Susan, we would like to give you these" Kerry announced, handing two wrapped gifts. "As a thank you and goodbye presents"

"Thanks" Susan unwrapped one of her presents. She gasped as her eyes marvelled at the 22-carat gold dress watch, a sentimental gift. "My god, thank you!"

She unwrapped another present; it was a "Rough Guide to New York" book as a joke gift.

"Just what I needed!" Susan laughed waving the book "I can't rely on Chloe showing me round!"

Susan spent rest of her time at the party chatting away with the colleagues.

An hour has passed by, Susan looked at her watch and it was time for her to go. She announced to everyone that she was leaving. She hugged everyone one by one, Pratt, Morris, Haleh, Chuny, Ray, Neela, Sam, Dubenko, Jerry, Frank, Lily, Weaver and another dozen members of staff. She noticed Abby looking down her pager and dashed out of the room.

Lastly Susan hugged Luka. "You take care of this place won't you?" She said to him, handing over the keys for the office "You'll make a great chief Luka…"

He nodded and puts his arm round Sam who approached them. Susan looked at both of them and gave them her wishes, hoping that everything goes well with the arrival of their baby.

Susan walked up to her locker, opened it to get her bag and coat out. Closed the door. She paused for a few seconds looking at her name badge displayed on her door. She forcefully pulled it off and puts it in her pocket. She leaves the lounge, through the door taking one last look. Susan strode through round the ER, watching the commotion that she is leaving behind. She watched her colleagues that she made friends over the years, busily working away treating patients. She found Abby in one of the trauma rooms frantically trying to revive a bloodied man. Susan popped her head round the door to say her goodbyes; Abby only got a glimpse of her standing at the doorway. The blonde stood there for a few minutes looking at her watch. Abby still carrying on defibbing then looks at that direction again… Susan was gone…

* * *

"Here you are" Susan said handing over her keys and paperwork to the estate agent "I hope you keep my house in one piece when you lease it out for me" 

"No problem Mrs.. I mean Doctor Lewis" The agent stuttered.

"I'm relying this place as my future investment" She raised her brows at him.

The agent got distracted when he noticed an Ambulance pulled up beside them. Susan turned her head and frowned. Abby popped her head out of the window.

"Abby?"

"Thank god for that!" The brunette shouted getting out of the passenger side, "I thought I've missed you"

"What you doing here?" The blonde frowned.

"What the hell you think? I came to say goodbye properly" She answered "Didn't get chance to do it when I got tied up in the trauma room, you were gone when I finished."

"I had to get here on time" Susan stated the fact she had to leave quickly.

Abby looked round and noticed everything belonging of Susan's has already on its way to New York. She did notice there was no Cosmo.

"Where's Cosmo?" She asked

"He's with his dad, I'm meeting him at the Airport" Susan replied "Chuck wanted to spend some quality time with him before we go"

A taxi pulled up, they both look at the vehicle and looked at each other again. They pull themselves into a hug

"You take care of yourself and that bump, ok?" Susan said with her head resting against Abby's, holding each other tightly.

She nodded "Sure will do"

They broke from the hug and looked at each other with their lips quivering.

"I hate saying goodbyes" Susan started to cry and then took a deep breath. "That's why I normally don't do farewell parties"

Abby nodded "I guess I'll see you in few months?" She said, looking down with sadness on her face, tracing her hand over her bump.

"Yes" She sighed, reached her hand out to gently pat her friends swollen belly. Susan shrugged "I guess this is it? I don't want to keep the driver waiting"

"You take care of yourself Susie" Abby said wiping a tear from her eye.

"I'm on the other end of the phone if you need me" Susan gently squeezes the brunette's arm.

"I'll keep that in mind"

Abby moved forward, tugged Susan's arm and planted a goodbye kiss on her lips "Have a good journey, bye…"

Abby watched Susan putting her baggage in the trunk and got in the taxi. She wound down the window and gave her a little wave. Abby waved back and watch the taxi leave. Disappearing from the end of the street. She got back in the Ambulance to take her to the County…


	41. Braxton Hicks?

**Chapter 41 – Braxton Hicks?**

_Two months later…_

Abby and Sam walked through the floors of a Mall to designate themselves to a baby store. They are both now on maternity leave and both are heavily pregnant, feeling uncomfortable with their huge bump. Sam was due a few days before which is not unusual for the baby to arrive late. She is feeling fed up and impatient waiting for the birth. Sam decided to fill the time by going shopping dragging Abby along to buy the last remaining things for the nursery. Their eyes marvelled when they entered the baby store. The place is filled with nursery equipment, cots, strollers, beddings, clothing and toys.

Sam puts her hand on her lower abdomen and winced.

"You ok?" Abby asked, tilting her head looking at her.

"Yeah I'm ok" She replied, her curls bounced when she shook her head. "It probably just Braxton Hicks, I've had them since 31 weeks…

"I first got it at that time too"

"This pregnancy feels so different from when I had Alex"

"Good news is that most women who have their second or more, they usually give birth quicker"

"Yeah I can't wait for that, I was 28 hours in labor"

"Uh you don't tell me! I've got a good endurance test ahead of me"

"I need to pee again," Sam moaned, rolling her eyes.

Abby laughed "It's a bummer really, baby pressing on your bladder"

"I'll just nip to the ladies room, won't be long"

"That's ok, I'll be in the bedding section" Abby watched her colleague head off to the toilets and walked to the bedding section.

Sam entered the ladies room and walked in one of the stalls. She sat down on the loo. She bends over clutching her stomach, groaning out loud in pain. She overheard a woman talking to another woman in the wash area.

"Sounds like she's constipated" She muttered. Sam scoffed in disbelief after hearing this. She lets out another groan.

Abby is browsing around until someone called her name caught her attention. It was an old acquaintance of hers. They got chatting for a while. When Abby finished her conversation with her friend, she realized that she has lost track of time. She frowned as her eyes scan round the baby department looking for Sam who is nowhere to be seen. Abby spotted an assistant and walked up to her but paused on the spot. She hesitated asking because she just realized what she was going to ask her… _have you seen a pregnant woman here?_ And the whole floor was full of them!

Abby decided that she would check the ladies room. She walked in and heard Sam groaning from one of the stalls. There was a young woman who was washing her hands.

"I've already asked if she is ok" The woman said, "She didn't reply"

Abby nodded "Ok" She watched the woman leave and knocked on the door "Sam? Are you ok in there?"

Abby heard the door bolt being unlocked.

"Sam!" Abby gasped when she pushes the door ajar and stared at the mess on the floor "Your water's broken"

Sam winced. "I can't move, it's so painful, I think the baby's coming, AARGH!"

"You're not wrong about that," Abby said, looking down with her hands on her waist. "Jeez Sam why didn't you tell me you were REALLY in labor? Not some Braxton Hicks"

"I dunno, like I said this pregnancy feels different"

"I want you to breathe in and out… in… out… in…" Abby rounded her lips and gracefully moved her hand in a breathing motion.

Sam laughed at Abby's face looking serious, trying to instruct her with her breathing technique.

"Ok… well I'm going to call the paramedics"

Abby squatted down to kneel on the floor. She had to catch her breath as the baby is putting pressure against her lungs when she leaned over. She got her cell phone out of her bag and flipped it open to punch in the numbers 911. Placed it to her ear and she listened to the ring. Waited for the operator to answer.

The operator answered, _"Please state your emergency?_"

"Hello I am a Doctor and I need the paramedics urgently, a pregnant woman in labor, need to get her to the hospital, her water's broken"

"Your location?" 

"We are at the 900 North Michigan Shops, a Mall on Michigan Avenue, in a store called _"GALT Baby"_ on Level 5… I think it's level 5?"

Abby flipped the phone shut and placed it on the floor.

"Paramedics are coming" Abby said, rubbing Sam's hand, who is nodding frantically, huffing and puffing. "Do you want me to contact Luka?"

Sam nodded "Please, oooooh!"

Abby picked up her phone and flipped it open again. Punched in her work number. She placed it to her ear listening to the dialling tone.

"_Hello ER"_ Jerry answered.

"Hey Jerry, it's Abby. I need you to get Luka"

"I'll page him for you and he can contact you, when he's free" 

"Aah!" Sam gritted her teeth.

"No Jerry!" Abby scolded down the phone "I need to speak to him now, at this instant, it's a matter of urgency"

"Ok, ok, who's making that noise?"  
"Never mind that Jerry… Get Luka now!" Abby shouted down the phone abruptly.  
"Erm… yes, hold the line, I'll see if I can find him" 

"Thank you" Abby said, rolling her eyes. She placed the phone on her shoulder and wedges it with her ear. Abby leaned forward to Sam and puts her hand on her bump to examine her. She can feel the contractions coming.

"They can't find Luka?" Sam asked, blowing air in and out repeatedly.

"Jerry's gone to fetch him" Abby replied. "Sam, I'm sorry to ask you this, I need you to lie down so I can check how far dilated you are"

"Just as well I am wearing a skirt today!" Sam said abruptly, widen her eyes at Abby "Go on have a nosy!"

"I just need to know whether the baby will come in here, in the ambulance or hopefully at the hospital, ok? I haven't got time for your embarrassment, not like as I've not seen it before"

"Oh yes… I forgot that you used to be an OB-GYN nurse" She winced again. "Eeeeeee!"

Abby lifted Sam's skirt to examine between her legs. She raised her brows and looked at Sam "Oh god you're 5 cm dilated!"

"Abby?" 

"Hello?" She answered holding the phone properly after unmerging it from between her shoulder and ear.

"Aargh!" Sam groaned in the background

"Dr Kovac will be waiting for you both" 

"Thanks Jerry" She hung-up and flipped the phone shut. Abby reassured Sam by saying "Luka's waiting at the hospital"

"Hello?" said a voice, echoed in the toilets.

"In here" Abby called out.

The paramedics have arrived...

* * *

Abby came rushing in through the ER doors, with the paramedics pushing a gurney with Sam on it. Luka came rushing to them.

"It's ok Sam I'm here" He said kissing her forehead and holds her hand. "Fill me in Abby?"

"She is now 7cm dilated" Abby replied, out of breath "We need to take her up, baby will be long coming"

"My god Sam I can't believe our baby's coming!"

"Oooooooh" Sam groaned, gritting her teeth at Luka.

Most of the staff in the ER stopped what they were doing and watched them all going past. Abby stopped for second to catch her breath back and carried on to catch up with the others. As she strode past the admit desk, she caught a glimpse at someone who is standing, looking and smiling at her. John Carter… She stumbled nearly tripping over her own feet in shock, when she got her balance back everything went in slow motion, as if she was in a dream. She started to feel dizzy. She could hear Sam shouting for her from a distance begging Abby not to leave her. She needed her to assist the delivery. Abby took a good look, elated with mixed feelings, feeling pleased but then again feelings of anger, hurt and rejection. She doesn't smile back and walks off…

"Abby?"

"What?" She snapped swinging herself round on her heel.

"Aren't you gonna say hello?"

Abby scoffed and folded her arms. She cocked her head to one side. Stared hard at him

"Wow look at you! You're glowing and your bump is so big" Carter chuckled. The expression on her face wiped the smile off his face. He knew she was not happy, he knew that there would be a lot of work to build up the trust back and amend their relationship. He feels optimistic about it because he has left her twice….

Abby still hasn't said a word to him. She took a deep breath and walked away…


	42. Gas n' Air

**Chapter 42 – Gas n' Air**

"Eeeeeeeergh! I want an epidural!" Sam shouted in her push. Her curls look straggly from the sweat.

"No Sam it's too late, I can't give you one, you are too far dilated" Abby answered. She is sitting between Sam's legs, which are up on the stirrups.

"God! I can't stand this anymore"

"You'll have to make do with gas n' air, ok?" Abby smiled wryly at her.

Sam lets out a long groan and glared at Luka "This is your fault Luka, putting me through this, Aargh!"

"What?" Luka shook his head and stroked her hand.

"Get off me, you are not much use here," She snapped.

Abby looked up at them and try not to laugh at them. Luka walked round to Abby and whispered in her ear.

"Abby, why is she being horrible to me?"

"Luka you should know this"

"I'm not a woman"

"Thank god for that!"

"Abby…?"

"Luka… Sam is going through the transitional stage ok, where the baby is almost there, so be prepare for her to say "fuck off" to you" Abby grinned at the worried Croatian, he looked back at her. _She's kidding right?_

Luka pursed his lips and took a hard swallow glancing back at Abby who is smiling broadly at him. He ran his fingers nervously through his floppy fringe.

"Come on Sam you can do it"

"Will you fucking shut up Luka!" She snarled with saliva dripping from her mouth, huffing and puffing.

"Ok Sam, I want you to push again," Abby instructed, sitting on a stool leaning over to find how near the baby's head is.

Sam lets out a long hard push. "Eeeeeeeeeeeeurghhhhhh!"

"Ok the baby's crowning, I want you to stop pushing"

Abby probed her finger into her opening and swept round to make sure the umbilical cord not wrapped round the baby's neck.

"Ok you can push again"

Sam lets out a loud scream and Luka rushed to beside of Abby who is pulling the baby out. Luka choked with joy when heard the baby cry. Chuny hands over a towel.

"Here" Abby puts the baby straight on to Sam's chest "You have a beautiful baby girl"

Sam lets out a laugh then cried with relief. Abby asked Luka to cut the cord and Chuny hands over a towel for Abby to wrap the baby up.

"Oh she's so beautiful!" They cooed.

"Thank you Abby" Luka said, looking at her with a grin. "We decided to call her Lily, after your suggestion at the prenatal appointment"

"Oh that's wonderful" Abby answered with flattery. She watched them looking so happy. Abby felt a little sadness because she doesn't know what her future holds with Carter. She looked at Chuny who is grinning and asked her to assist her to take the baby from them, to be weigh and cleaned up…

* * *

Luka walked out of the delivery room with his new baby in his arms. He was surprised at the turn out from the colleagues, waiting anxiously to see the new arrival. Everyone rushed to him to have a glimpse at the new arrival.

"It's a girl!" Luka grinned.

"Oh she's beautiful!"

"Oh she's got your dark hair"

"She's so small" Neela putting her finger in the baby's tiny hand.

"Not that small if she weighed 8 pounds 9 oz!" Luka chuckled.

"Congratulations Luka" Carter said, shaking his hand.

"Hey welcome back" Luka nodded.

Pratt came up to Luka and puts his hand out "Congratulation's man"

Abby groaned as she arched her achy back as she walked out from the delivery room. Everyone looked in her direction.

"What?" She shook her head defensively and laughed, "No no I'm not in labor!"

Everybody started to chuckle and blew out a sigh of relief.

"What a shame, would have been nice that you both deliver on the same day" Haleh said.

"Oh give me a break! I'm knackered," Abby said, walking towards the brooding crowd. She sighed to herself after seeing Carter, who is already present, smiling at her.

"So does she have a name?" Neela asked, putting her finger in the baby's tiny hand.

"Lily"

"Oh that's beautiful!"

"Named after our nurse?" Haleh asked as she was referring to Nurse Lily Jarvik.

"No no after my grandmother Lilijana, but Sam didn't want her to have a foreign name, Abby came up with short version"

"Aww how sweet of you Abby"

"Actually I like to say again a big thank you to Abby for delivering this beautiful thing" Luka smiled.

Abby gave an embarrassed smile. The baby started to wail and Luka rocked her gently.

"Oh? Tata better return Lily to her mother, she might be hungry" Luka announced.

"We'll pop by see Sam later" Haleh nodded. Everyone left to go back to the ER.

Abby looked at Carter and walks pass him without saying a word. He turned and reached out to grab her arm and pulls her back.

"Hey!" He snapped. Abby glared at him after she looked down at his firm grasp. Carter lets go of her "I understand that you're angry with me, ok? Please don't ignore me"

"I think the word hurt is best described"

"I'm not proud ok? I least I cleaned myself up" He nodded with his brows raised "I wish I could find a way of repairing the damage between us"

"Hope so and hope you do, you look well"

"Thanks and how have you been with pregnancy?"

"Why you should ask? You haven't bothered to be around" Abby gently folds her arms and rest them on her bump.

"Do I have to explain myself again? You want me to grovel?"

"Too damn right I want you to grovel." Abby puts her hands on her waist trying to look assertive.

"What did you want me to do, hold your bump past 8 months?"

"No…" She looked down biting her lower lip and sighed nervously, "I wanted you to hold me…"

They looked at each other in silence. Carter gives her a sad smile and sighed.

"I wanted love and affection but you neglected me"

"Abby I'm so sorry" Carter said in a strangulated voice. He started to cry. "I'm sorry I screwed up!"

"No you didn't you screw up, you went through a hard time coming to terms with the loss of your son" Abby blinked hard at Carter, watching him breaking down in tears, she doesn't whether she should give him a hug instead she gave him a pat on his back at arms reach. She may sympathise but still very bitter because he wasn't there when she is most in need of comfort "I fully understand but running away from it all doesn't help"

"No it doesn't, you're right, I've learnt that now" He agreed, "I've had bereavement counselling when I was away"

"Good for you, I hope it has helped"

"I wished I gone earlier"

"We've all put things off when we can't set our minds straight"

"So who's been by your side, with the antenatal?" Carter sniffed "I hope you haven't been doing this alone, have you been tagging along with Sam then?"

"Not much, we work different shifts, Susan has been there for me"

"Oh Susan? Where is she?" He asked moving his head to look around "I'm surprised that she isn't here to brood over the baby"

"She's not here" Abby shook her head.

"Oh it's her day off" He nodded

"No, she's gone…"

"Gone?"

"She left for New York, 2 months ago"

"Oh? I'm shocked, I thought she was doing great as a Chief"

"Yes she was, but she wanted to move on after splitting with Chuck"

"They've split?" Carter scoffed "Seems like nothing lasts round here"

"Damn right Carter nothing does"

"No one told me downstairs about Suse"

"Oh they assume that you knew then?"

Carter nodded and looked down twiddling his thumbs. He nervously asked her "I was wondering if you would like dinner tonight?"

Abby tilted her head forward to peer her eyes in to his "As a date or as friends?"

"Whichever you want"

"A date… no, as friends? Well I suppose"

"That was a bit vague"

"John… I think we've got a lot of work to do to rebuild that trust you broken"

"Oh it's my fault is it?" Carter asked defensively.

"You left me twice"

"No once"

Abby frowned.

"We weren't together when I left in the New Year"

"Oh I forgot it's only a one night stand? Is that what you call it?" Abby snapped "Jeez I feel better now that I'm a slut"

"Well you're not trustworthy yourself"

"What you mean by that?"

"You were seeing Jake"

"I dumped him after sleeping with you" Abby waved her arms, protesting. "I made my decision wanting to be with you"

"But you had a funny way of showing it that you wanted to reconciled with me after that night"

"I was confused" She shrugged her shoulders.

"Confused about who you should be with?"

"No! Aargh!" Abby growled and clenched her hands with frustration "I wanted to be with you but I put my guard up because you hurt me in the past and I fear that you would clear off again… and you did!"

"You know what our problem is? A breakdown in communication" He pursed his lips.

"Yes… you know what they say _action speak louder than words_"

"Absolutely…" Carter grinned. "I guess you only want me around just for the baby?"

"Well support would be great but then again, I still want you, I wanted you before I fell pregnant"

"Aah you still want me!" Carter laughed and nodded playfully.

"I didn't say that" Abby said, defensively.

"Yes you did"

"Did I?" Abby smirked and shook her head.


	43. You Must Love Me

**Chapter 43 – You Must Love Me**

Disclaimer: Lyrics "You Must Love Me" Madonna

Abby is curled up on her couch reading a book and drinking herbal tea. She is relaxing after a strenuous eventful day shopping and delivering a baby. She heard the unlocking of the door and it's Neela arriving back home from her shift.

"Hi" Neela greeted putting her bag down on the table.

"Hi, good day?" Abby smiled wryly tracing her hand over her huge bump.

"Abby, I have something to tell you"

Abby jerked up and turned to her head at Neela who is in the kitchen area, getting a glass of water.

"I'm moving out, I've found another place"

"Oh ok"

"I want to be out of your hair before your baby arrives"

"So where are you going?" Abby asked, lifting her up mug to her mouth level.

"Ray's"

Abby almost takes a sip but paused as her lips touched the rim of the mug. She smiled and frowned at Neela "Ray's?"

"Yes"

"But I thought…" Abby stuttered doing a pointing gesture.

"Well that's another thing I need to tell you" Neela interrupted

"Well go on…"

"Erm…" Neela giving her a nervous smile "Ray and I have been seeing each other"

"Really?" Abby chirped, raising her brows. She tried not to laugh, "So that explains you coming home at all hours?"

"Yes" Neela coughed

"So How long you two erm… you know?"

"About 3 months"

"Gosh you both kept that under wraps" Abby noticed Neela's face turned in to a shade of red "Neela you're blushing!"

Neela laughed nervously again "I bet you think I'm mad? We have been getting so well and we both admitted that we like each other" She said, in her posh British accent. "We both clashed when we lived together before because of sexual tension, he liked me and I liked him and we had no idea"

"That happens all the time Neela, been there and done it"

"I see you and Dr Carter talking again"

"If you call it that"

"So what are you doing tonight?"

"I'm having dinner with him" Abby glanced at Neela who is looking puzzled "Yes we are going to talk about the baby's future ok?"

"Oh so it's not a date?"

"Maybe… depends how long it takes for us to argue"

"Because you put your stubborn head on"

"I won't take crap ok, I am not passive like you" Abby said honestly.

"Maybe you should set up a club so I can join _Abby Lockhart's Kick Ass Club_ to build up my assertive skills."

Abby had to laugh at Neela. The young Indian maybe extremely intelligent but she can be a bit ditzy at times.

"Ow!" Abby winced.

"You ok?" Neela jumped to Abby's side.

"Yes I'm fine, this baby has a hell of a kick" Abby rubbed her tummy "It's like a soccer match in there"

Abby struggled to get herself up on her feet, Neela rushed to her to help her up.

"Well I will be moving stuff one by one, hopefully when Ray's gets the band's van off Brett so we can shift more stuff"

"Ok, I'm going to miss you Neela" Abby pulled her into a hug.

"I'm gonna miss you too" She smiled sadly "Well we will still see each other"

"Of course"

They were interrupted by a knock on the door. Abby opened the door and stood a blonde woman carrying her toddler on her hip.

"Susan!"

"Abby Hi!" Susan grinned as her eyes fixated on the size of Abby's bump "I know I'm a day early, I managed to get the extra time off because I have got things to sort out"

"Ok"

"Hey Neela!"

"Hello Susan"

"Wow Abby you look great and huge!" Susan commented as she lowered Cosmo down on to his feet and bends over to talk to Abby's tummy "Hello bump!"

Abby grinned "So what brings you here early, you know the stuff need to sort out"

"Just general things I need to clear up, if it's a problem I'll find a hotel"

"No no you stay here"

"Well isn't it a bit crowded with Neela on the couch?" The blonde asked

"Neela is half way moving out and she doesn't stay here much"

"Going anywhere nice?"

Neela opened her mouth slightly to answer but she is interrupted by Abby.

"Ray's!" She laughed with tease.

"Really?" Susan joined in the laugh "You two finally got it together!"

Neela blushed "Yes, well I must go now"

They watch Neela rush off with embarrassment. Susan's eyes searched for her son. She spotted him fiddling with Abby's hi-fi system's volume.

"Cosmo no touch!" Susan demanded as she took him by the hand and pulled him away. "I'm sorry Abby"

"That's ok, I've got all that to come with this little one" Abby grinned pointing at her tummy. "Susan you look really well, your hair has grown longer"

"Yeah I feel well, I feel more relaxed now after so much going on earlier this year"

"Well you said you felt relaxed on the phone, enjoying your new position"

She nodded "I do miss County…"

Abby winced again clutching her tummy.

"You ok?" Susan asked patting her friend on the back

"Damn Braxton Hicks" She groaned straightening herself up "Look Susan, I won't be any company cos I'm going out tonight"

"That's ok because I have plans too…" Susan nodded "Hey well done for delivering Sam and Luka's baby"

* * *

The doorman opens the door for Abby to enter the "Beaucoup" restaurant; she is seduced by the stylish surroundings with relaxed atmosphere. The dining area is basking in the glow of soothing state of the art lighting. The interior design presented in stylish, walnut flooring, distinguished art collection hung up on the cream colored walls and a wood burning fireplace. Tinted windows display the outside world with awe-inspiring views of the Chicago skyline and the river.

"Hey" Carter greeted, standing at the bar.

"Hi" Abby sat herself on to the barstool. She sighed with relief after carrying the extra weight. She turned her head away so Carter cannot see her wincing at a sharp pain in lower abdomen. The bartender paused to look her face and she mouthed at him "I'm ok…"

"I could have picked you up"

"It's ok I am big girl I can find my way here" She replied, turning her head to look at Carter "Actually Susan dropped me off"

"Susan?" Carter pricked up his ears and asked, "Is she back in town?"

"Yes"

"You look nice" He studied her in admiration. Abby is wearing black slacks and a black close fitting top that hangs nicely over maternal figure.

"Thanks" Abby replied and looked at the bartender "Can I have sparkling water with slice of lemon please"

"Our table should be ready in a minute"

"Good cos I'm starved"

"Well you are eating for two" Carter chuckled

Abby curled up her top lip to sneer, "Carter, that's a load of crap about eating for two, it's an old wives tale ok? It's not good for you or the baby to eat too much anyway"

"I know" He picked up his beer and takes a sip. "Abby…"

"Yes?"

"You're acting different"

"In what way?"

"Up tight"

"Up tight?" She repeated after him "I just exhausted ok, it's been a long day and I'm getting tired everyday carrying your child around"

"Carter?" asked the restaurant manger.

"Yes"

"Your table is ready sir"

Carter signalled Abby to go first to be ushered to the table. Carter pulled out a chair for Abby to sit down and seated himself opposite. The waiter hands over the menus and asked them if they wanted drinks.

"Is it an insult John, for you to choose a French restaurant?" Abby commented, scanning through the menu.

"I don't know what you mean?" Carter shook his head.

"Yes you do"

"I love this place, Kem and I…" He paused to stop talking before rubbing the salt into Abby's wound after it has dawned on him what she was implying. "I didn't pick it intentionally, if you want to go someplace else…"

Abby interrupted "No no this looks great"

"Abby"

"Yes?" She answered chewing her bottom lip without her eyes leaving the menu.

"Do me a favor, please don't mention her, I'm trying to move on ok?"

Abby eyes left the menu to look back into his eyes and pouted at him.

The distinguished looking waiter approached them with a writing pad, leaning forward gracefully. "Are you ready to order? Madam?"

"Erm… Yes I'll have the Poached Beef Tournedos Rossini, seared foie gras medallion, potato purée and sauce Périgueux" Abby said pointing at the menu.

"Monsieur?" The waiter asked after jotting down Abby's requests.

"And I'll have the Roasted Venison Loin, sweet corn & chanterelle ragoût, creamy polenta, summer truffle salad, and red wine sauce"

"You're being adventurous" Abby smiled handing over her menu to the waiter and picked up her glass. Her eyes never left Carter as she takes a sip of her water; he stared back at her flirtatious move.

"So what have you spent with the 20 grand I gave you?" He asked.

"Nothing" Abby answered with a sigh.

"Nothing?" Carter leaned forward laughed uncomfortably.

"How am I to pay for a nursery where I only have a one bedroom apartment? I can only manage a cot in my bedroom"

"That baby isn't going stay in your room when it's gets bigger"

"I'll find somewhere else later ok? I trying to cope doing this on my own at the moment and the last thing I want is moving home heavily pregnant, I want to relax and chill out"

"Why don't you move in at my place?"

Abby paused with her mouth slightly open "I can't do that"

"Why not?"

"Because it wouldn't be right"

"I have plenty of room"

"I know you have!"

"Why don't you and the baby move in my top floor, it like annexe, I use it for my guests, two bedrooms and ensuite bathroom"

"I don't know John, I really don't want to think about moving"

"The offers there ok? You weren't considering staying at your apartment?" He raised his brows at her trying to state what's best for the child "God you are still defensive aren't you?"

"Well what you do expect? You left me on my own during the entire pregnancy, You weren't there for the first scan, seeing our little one on the screen, I cried in front of Susan because I was distraught at the fact you wasn't there"

"Yes ok, don't have to keep rubbing it in, you don't know how I felt"

"Can we not talk about that again? I don't want to ruin the evening going over stuff that will not get us anywhere, I'm looking ahead, leave whatever behind, tonight is the chance to talk and work things out, ok?"

Carter nodded in agreement "Ok" He said and quickly changed the subject "So you know what sex it is?"

"Nope"

"You didn't ask?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise, is that ok?"

"I'll choose the boys name"

"No you're not" Abby snapped, "You are choosing the girls name, and I already have a name for a boy ok?"

"Oh yes, tell me…"

"No it's going to be a surprise" She shook her head.

The waiter arrived with their food; He lowered a plate in front of Abby and then Carter. Her brows arched as she inspected her gourmet meal. A meal that she would not afford, main course started at sixty dollars. Abby thought to herself that she might have to drop by at a fast food joint on the way home due to the molecule sized portion. Carter noticed Abby's childlike gawp at her plate; he read her mind _Jeez Carter_ _is this it?_

"It's quality not quantity," Carter boasted, he is experienced in the lavish lifestyle. Then he was muttering to himself thinking of baby's name while he picked up his cutlery. "I might give it a middle name like Eleanor after my mother"

"I like Eleanor, becoming fashionable again, well it least is better than my mothers Margaret or my middle name Marjorie" Abby said, prodding at her food then dropped the fork as a sharp pain went right through her. The clatter from the cutlery landing on the plate made everyone turn and looked at Abby wincing.

"You ok?" He asked leaning forward with his eyes racing round looking at the diners watching on.

"I'm ok… Just cramp"

After battling with their tensions, their civilised conversation relaxed their moods as the evening went on, building the connection…

* * *

_Where do we go from here?  
This isn't where we intended to be  
We had it all, you believed in me  
I believed in you_

"Would you like to go for a walk?" Carter suggested "It is a beautiful night only if you can manage"

"A walk would be lovely" She smiled. Abby waddled with Carter across the road to stroll along the riverside as the last light of the day fades away.

_Certainties disappear  
What do we do for our dream to survive?  
How do we keep all our passions alive,  
As we used to do?_

"Give me your hand" Carter gestured his at Abby, she lifted her arm and placed her hand into his and clasped them firmly. They both walk hand in hand, Carter glanced at Abby and she smiled back at him.

_Deep in my heart I'm concealing  
Things that I'm longing to say  
Scared to confess what I'm feeling  
Frightened you'll slip away_

_You must love me  
You must love me_

Carter stopped to turn and their eyes searched each other face and he could not resist to lean his head forward to kiss her. Abby did not hesitate from his move, when their lips met, she went ahead parting her mouth to probe her tongue to swirl it inside his mouth. Her arms clung round his neck and he just managed to wrap his round her waist.

_Why are you at my side?  
How can I be any use to you now?  
Give me a chance and I'll let you see how  
Nothing has changed_

_You must love me_

_So is it goodbye?_

Abby broke away from the kiss, clutching to her tummy again, she is feeling discomfort and they carried on walking. From a distance Carter glanced at a couple with a toddler asleep in the pushchair, kissing by the riverside.

"That's nice that those two over there with a kiddie, they are still loved up" Carter pointed out.

Abby froze on the spot "My god… That's Susan and Chuck!"

"What?" He shook his head and laughed "I didn't recognized Suse, her hair is longer, I haven't seen her for 8 months"

They headed to the estranged couple and surprised them with their presence.

"I see you got your stuff sorted out Susan?" Abby smiled wryly, with her head cocked to one side.

Susan gasped as she broke away from their kiss, her face turned in to a deep shade of red. Abby raised her brows waiting for her to say something.

"John!" Susan broke the awkward silence "Good to see you again, you look well"

"Thanks, you look great" Carter replied and nodded at Chuck

"Well Chuck and I have been trying to work out stuff between us, why it went wrong and we though we give it another try"

"And why not" Abby said gritting her teeth as another eave of sharp pain. She stumbled to the nearby bench and sat down to take deep breaths. Everyone rush to her and crowded round her to make a fuss.

"How long have you these pains?" Susan frowned as she placed her hand on the bump to feel for contractions. Carter is looking excited like a kid in a candy store, watching then discussing the possibility of Abby is going into an early labor.

"Since early afternoon, it's coming on more frequently in the past two hours," Abby replied groaning out "I might be in full labor by the end of the night!"

"Hey Abs if you get the baby out quickly, it will have the same birthday as Sam and Luka's baby!" Carter chuckled.

"This baby is not due for another two weeks!" Abby clenched her jaws.

"My god, what if I didn't come today and stuck to the original plan coming tomorrow evening, I might have missed the delivery!" Susan said putting her hand over her mouth.

"I call it fate," Chuck chuckled.


	44. The Arrival

**Chapter 44 – The Arrival**

**12.16 AM**

"We need to get her up to OB!" Susan shouted bursting through the ambulance bay doors, helping Carter holding on to Abby who is staggering in pain. Jerry dashed from the admit desk and grabbed nearest available wheelchair and Abby dropped herself in to it when he parked it behind her. Susan rushed to the admit desk to phone to inform the OB that they are on their way. Pratt and Morris who are on their night shift watch Carter rushing Abby into the elevator.

"Just breathe in and out" Carter doing the breathing technique.

"Hee hee ooh ooh" Abby panted watching the elevator door closing.

"Whoa whoa wait for me!" Susan shouted rushing in after jamming her hand to stop the doors from closing.

"In and out, in and out"

"Shut up will you? You're not the one in pain here!" She snapped

Carter looked at Susan pursing her lips trying not to smile. They both winced at Abby's deafening scream inside the elevator.

"Aargh!" She screamed in agony.

"Just breathe slowly," Susan said leaning over rubbing her back. Abby nodded as she cocked her head to bury it into Susan's side, she pats her on the head "You're doing just fine"

The elevator door opened and they rush out to the corridor and swerved the wheel chair in to one of the free delivery rooms.

"How are we doing?" The obstetrician asked wheeling in the Electronic Fetal Monitor.

"Fine at the moment, her membranes ruptured an hour ago" Susan said, putting on the yellow protective gown on. "She's having contractions every 4 minutes"

"You will manage ok, if you need any assistance I'm next door dealing with another patient"

"Thanks"

"Oooooooh!" Abby moaned as she puts on the surgical gown and placed herself on to the bed.

Susan picked up the belt from the EFM and strapped it round Abby's tummy to monitor the baby's heartbeat and contraction. She then placed the tiny electrode on to the baby's scalp. Susan looked at the VDU for the readings.

"Everything looks good" She commented loosening the belt. "You have very string contractions"

"Do you need your back rubbing?" Carter asked softly, as he feels as though he is treading on eggshells.

Abby nodded "Please"

He sighed with relief and starts to rub her back.

**1.02 AM**

"I need an epidural!" Abby cried in pain. "Eeeeeurrrrrrghhhh!"

"I'll just check the dilation" Susan leaned over to examine underneath Abby's gown. "You're 5 cm apart, It's ok you can have one, I'll go and get the anaesthetist"

Susan left the room to get the anaesthetist from next door.

"You're just doing fine" Carter said, rubbing Abby's back as she is wincing with pain.

The anaesthetist followed Susan as she walked back in to the delivery room and he starts to rummage through the drawers for the equipment. He stood by Abby lifting her left hand and inserts an IV drip. He kindly asked her to curl up in to a foetal position then inserts a spinal-block injection in her lower back. Susan held her hand while Carter stroked her hair.

**2.04 AM**

"You are fully dilated" Susan said, looking between Abby's legs. "I want you to start pushing on your next contraction ok?"

Carter dabbed a cold flannel over her grimacing face, her hair is tied up but the sweat has made her loose strands clung to her skin.

"Eeeeeurrrrrrghhhh!" She groaned in her pant.

Carter grasped hold of Abby's hand and rubbed it. "You know Abby I want this baby have the best in life"

"I am not having this child spoilt like you ok?" She sneered at him then screwed up her face as she goes for another push "Neeeeeurgh! Ooh ooh!"

Her honesty wiped the smile off his face then glanced at Susan, she is nodding in agreement. Quite true Abby doesn't want their child to have _everything_. She wants this child to have a normal up bringing regardless that Carter is stinking rich.

"I don't want to rush things between us John" Abby gasped.

"Ok you can have all the time you need"

"Take things one as a time ok?"

"What ever you want Abby, I will always be there"

"Will you? I'm being optimistic about it"

"I will this time"

"Will you? Oh I'm sure you will!" Abby said sarcastically. "Ooooh!"

"Guys, cut the domestic!" Susan interrupted shaking her head.

"Yeah what's with you and Chuck? You said you would never go back to him"

"Well I am a hypocrite ok… happy now?" She nodded frantically "you two don't have any room to talk"

They all look at each other seriously thinking about what they all just been saying. A smile crept up on their faces and they had to laugh about it.

"What are we like?" Abby laughed then lets out a grunt.

Carter started to massage her shoulders but Abby pushed him away.

"Get off you are annoying me," She growled.

Carter laughed, "I can tell she's going through that transitional stage!"

"Righty ho John" Susan nodded, looking down examining Abby's vaginal opening.

"Can you see the baby's head yet?" Carter asked walking to Susan's side and cocked his head to look. He raised his brows.

"Nope" She answered, "How are you feeling Abby?"

"Absolute shit!" She yelled "I am not going to have anymore children! Aaaargh!"

"I said that when I went in labor with Cosmo!" The blonde guffawed

"God Susan!" Abby begged with her bottom lip quivering "I can't do this anymore, I'm so tired!"

"Abby you are doing ok, you're doing well" She praised her with a smile "We are nearly there hun…"

**2.32 AM**

"I can see the head crowning, I want you to stop pushing" Susan instructed.

Abby is experiencing the urge to bear down but trying to resist. She started to pant as she tries to control her desire. As the baby's head emerge Susan probed her finger into her opening to feel around the baby's neck to make sure that the cord is not present. Gritting her teeth, Abby then pushes on her next contraction, as the baby's shoulders are free. Susan asked for a suction to clear the mucus and then guided the baby as it slithered out of her vagina followed by a great gush of amniotic fluid.

"It's a boy!" Susan cried with joy as she lifted up the tiny little baby carefully with its face screwed up crying, looking bluey-purple covered in blood and amniotic fluid. She placed the baby on her chest and dabbed it dry with a towel.

Abby felt a sob caught in her throat as she looks on at the brand new life. Tears came streaming down Carter's face. Abby looked at him laughing and crying. He leaned over to kiss her. Susan clamped the umbilical cord and Carter cuts it. She then wrapped the newborn in a towel and placing him on Abby's chest.

"He's beautiful!" Carter choked as he felt a lump in his throat.

"Riley Jonathan Lewis Carter" Abby announced, stroking the baby's cheek with her finger.

"Lewis?" Susan gasped in surprise.

"Yes I wanted to give him a middle name after you" She smiled "Well both of you"

"It's perfect" Carter grinned and leaned over to kiss Abby again.

Abby tugged Susan's arm for attention. Pulled her to herself and gave her a kiss. "Thank you"

Susan grinned with tears welling up in her eyes. She took the baby off Abby and carried him over to get him, cleaned up, weighed and checked over while the OB nurse delivers the placenta.

"He weighs seven pounds and two ounces" Susan announced the baby's birth weight.

"He's got all the right things in the right places" Susan commented. She started the apgar scoring. "Heart 2, Breathing 2, Movements 2, Color 1, Reflexes 2"

Abby's teeth started to shatter as she shakes and shivered after the delivery of the placenta, her body is adjusting from the deprivation of the heat it produced. Susan walked over to Abby with the baby cradle in her arms.

"You may want to give him a feed?" She asked.

"Sure" Abby takes her newborn in her arms. She latches him on to one of her breast for him to drink the colostrum. She jerked in surprise at his strong sucking reflex.

"I better notify our families about the arrival" Carter said excitedly, he leaned over to kiss Abby and looked at her exhausted face "I love you…"

Abby watch him leave the room and looked at her child in admiration stroking his face while suckling away. Susan sat herself on to the bed next to Abby leaning over to coo at Riley.

"He's beautiful"

"I can't believe that I'm a mother now"

"I think you'll be a great one too"

"It's gonna be hard work, I'm going to be better mom than my own mother"

"I'm sure you will" She grinned "Abby… John loves you"

"I know"

"But how you feel about him?"

"You know Susan…"

"I've informed everyone…" Carter walked back in to the room with the biggest smile. He is still overwhelmed at the arrival. Abby unlatches Riley from her breast and she handed over Riley to Carter to hold him. His eyes are fixated on his son "He's got the Wyczenski nose"

"John…" Abby reached out to tug his arm to bring him towards herself and kisses him. She lets out a weary sigh when she broke away from the kiss and said, "I love you…"


	45. Short Closure

**Chapter 45 – Short Closure**

_Six Weeks later…_

Their bodies moved back and forth under the bed covers, moaning out loud with the rhythm. After the last groan, they threw back the covers to come up for air.

Abby laughed out loud feeling happy.

"I love you" Carter whispered in her ear while still lying on top of her "I still can't get your voice out of my head when you first said _I love you_ when Riley was born"

Abby nodded in reply.

"Well I've waited years for you to say that"

"Well I've said it"

"Eventually"

"What you expect? I've have been hurt in the past"

"I know"

They both kissed deeply again, with Carter stroking her hair.

"So how is it for you both living here then?" Carter asked breaking away from the kiss.

"Well we've only been here three days so I don't know, Riley seems happy in his nursery"

"Must have been good because you hardly slept in the guest room haven't you?" He said playfully.

"How could I resist? It's been a while John, I do have my needs" Abby moved her head up to plant a kiss on his lips and whispered "I love you"

"I promise I won't leave you again"

"How can you prove it?"

Carter shrugged his shoulders. "I am going to get a drink, do you want one?"

"Yes please"

Carter climbed out of bed and Abby is looking at his naked butt in admiration as he walks out of the bedroom, grabbing a robe from behind the door. She then sinks her head deeply in to the pillows letting out a sigh then closes her eyes for a moment. Abby is woken up by Carter crawling under the covers from her feet, sliding himself up her to meet face to face.

Abby shakes her head looking up at Carter "Where's my drink?"

"That will follow" He answered "First thing first"

Abby narrowed her eyes wondering what he was up to.

"You know when we said that we wouldn't rush anything"

"Yes"

"We have sort of" He nodded playfully "I said to you that you can move in when you're ready"

Abby said in a long tone "Yes"

"And erm… we've made love a few times since you moved in"

"Come on Carter what is it you are trying to say?"

"I am saying that you are not hesitating things with us? Seems that we've rushed everything"

"So? These things happen"

"Oh good I just wanted to know how you feel" Carter lets out sigh "I said I would not ever leave you again and I want to prove it"

"Ok how are you going to prove it then?"

Carter jiffled about whilst lying on top of Abby, trying to slip his hand into his robe pocket. Abby frowned at his frustration trying to reach something. Carter smiled and brings up the item to her face. A small jewellery box, he flipped the lid open and inside is a diamond ring. Abby lets out a gasp as her eyes marvelled the glistening cut sitting on top 22-carat gold band.

"Abby, will you marry me?"

Abby lay speechless, she is dumbfounded at Carter's unexpected proposal.

"Abby? Are you going to say anything?" He asked worriedly, having thoughts that he might have regret asking her as she may turn him down.

"Yes!" She laughed out loud.

Carter laughed with joy, he pulled the ring out of the box and slipped it on Abby's third finger of her left hand.

"It's beautiful"

"Yes beautiful like you" Carter leaned in to kiss and they cuddle for a while.

"How long have you been planning this?" Abby asked out of curiosity "The proposal"

"Since before we broke up, I've kept this ring since then"

"What?" Shaking her head in confusion "That long?"

"You remember that meal we had before I first left for Africa?"

"Yes"

"I was going to ask you then"

Abby mouth widens in shock "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I couldn't, not after what you said, thinking that we had no future"

"Oh god" Abby chews on her bottom lip starting to feel bad "I got scared that things were getting heavy between us…"

"Well that's all in the past ok?" Carter interrupted "What happens now is what matters to us"

"Yes"

Carter leaned in for another kiss, Abby broke away and looked into his eyes.

"Well remind me again how gifted you are in bed?" Abby gave a dirty laugh.

They made passionate love again before the baby in the nursery wakes up from its afternoon sleep.

The End


End file.
